Just hiding in the toilet for five minutes…

[TheLightSideOfTheMoon]

I don’t mind cooking.

I don’t mind washing up.

What I CANNOT do is cook or clear up with PEOPLE hovering in the kitchen.

It is a small kitchen. It is made smaller with two more people hanging around. It is made EVEN SMALLER when one of those people opens a drawer (like, that’s half of the width of the floor space) then stands in front of it (almost touching and nudging me while I deal with HOT THINGS) debating over which of the twenty identical teaspoons they wish to use.

Fucking move. I want to dish up. You can see me holding HOT POTATOES. Take a spoon and GO.

This is why I stopped having my parents here for a weekly meal. I remember now.

Merry Christmas every one.

Kitchen lingers deserve a poke in the eye. With whatever teaspoon they eventually pick.

Worse when your chef dc is clearly twitching in your small kitchen.. Wanting to help but doesn't want to overstep..
Just grab a knife and get carving!

Why don’t you just say

Thanks for trying to help but small kitchen…why don’t you guys sort the drinks or take a seat and I’ll be in with the food in a minute

I feel you OP. Im just taking 15 mins out to chill on my bed.
I tidied up earlier and actually said to our guests "right can you all please sit in the other room and leave me to it for 30 mins". I can't bear lingerers.

I’ve tried a million times to say thanks but no thanks.

I used to have them around once a week for a meal but my mum’s insistence to hover (somehow blocking the fridge, sink and exit despite not being especially large) put a stop to that.

It doesn’t work. You can say, “There’s actually not enough room for you to be standing here.” or constantly saying, “Excuse me, I need to get to the fridge. Excuse me, I need to get to the sink.” I doesn’t go in. She still gravities back in.