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Original poster

Did you end up with the type of partner you thought you would?

42 replies

Wundering · 21/12/2021 16:38

I’m messaging/ seeing a man who is lovely and kind, works hard, would be a great partner in life but he’s very serious. I am not sure about things obviously.

I am quieter myself but always thought I’d meet my opposite, someone more lighthearted…

OP posts:
icelolly12 · 21/12/2021 18:33

But you have to enjoy his company... if you enjoy his company and feel happy around him and get excited to see him that's great. However, if you're checking your watch and thinking how to fill the silence and feeling bored in his company.. maybe not. Only you know and maybe you need more time to assess the situation and your feelings.

SwedishEdith · 21/12/2021 18:44

@Wundering

No, he’s not made me laugh :/
Not even a warm chuckle that's made you think there might be something there? If not, then no.
Original poster
Wundering · 21/12/2021 18:50

He misunderstood something and I thought it was funny, and he had a few really interesting stories, but no, not really.

OP posts:
Autumnscene · 21/12/2021 18:54

My first husband.. well. Quite opposite from me. Academic, dependable, serious but good husband and father. But complete opposite interests and desires.

Second husband.. complete crazy whirlwind romance, love bombed you might call it, enjoy his company, get excited to see him, makes me laugh all the time but is dependable, generous and definitely the guy I need to end up with !

Lindy2 · 21/12/2021 19:43

No. I actually didn't really like my husband when I first met him. He was a bit loud and a show off.

Once I got to know him I discovered a much softer side to him.

We've been together 29 years now despite lots of people thinking we'd never last.

Sometimes being a bit different is each other works.

Lindy2 · 21/12/2021 19:46

He makes me laugh though. Laughing is important.

WalkingOnSonshine · 21/12/2021 19:48

He balances me, he’s exactly what I need.

I bring him out of his shell, make him less serious & less self-absorbed.

ImInStealthMode · 21/12/2021 19:48

I'd give him a chance OP, if you're enjoying his company. I know a couple of Men who come across quite serious on first impression (largely because of their serious jobs I think) but settle into being a riot when they've got to know someone and relaxed.

Odile13 · 21/12/2021 20:00

It interests me that as a quieter person you wanted to meet somebody who is the opposite! I wanted somebody who was also ‘quiet’ like me.

DH and I are both introverts but then again we also both joke around a lot and have compatible sense of humour.

goodwinter · 21/12/2021 20:01

@Wundering

No, he’s not made me laugh :/
No way could I be with someone who didn't make me laugh. I wouldn't even think of pursuing it.
Terribleluck · 21/12/2021 20:05

No I thought I would end up with some chubby guy, but my DH is my "dream man" from when I was at uni, so can't complain!

Wormwoodgal · 21/12/2021 20:23

Have you made him laugh yet?

Original poster
Wundering · 21/12/2021 20:59

Yes, I have made him laugh. I’m quiet but there’s a certain type of extrovert that I tend to get along well with- I can be really quick and love puns and wordy jokes, if that makes sense.

OP posts:
ZaraBananaAnd · 21/12/2021 22:02

Looks wise, yes. Because I’m so so fussy and have such a specific type and would rather have nobody than someone I didn’t find attractive.

Personally wise , I’m surprised the sort of man dh is. As above I chose looks first then just thought I’d have to hope I was lucky and he had a good personality (he does but he’s not what I expected if that makes sense but not in a bad way !)

ZaraBananaAnd · 21/12/2021 22:02

*personality

Heartofglass12345 · 22/12/2021 12:25

No - I grew up with an absent father and living with a violent relationship with my mum and stepdad from the age of 13. Both my sisters ended up with twats, I assumed I would end up the same.

I married someone who would never dream of treating me badly. He would do anything for me. He is much quieter than me with regards to socialising etc but that's fine by me! I count myself very lucky.

TwoBigNoisyBoys · 22/12/2021 13:51

I’ve actually ended up with the man I had a huge crush on when I was 16 🥰 we always liked each other but were never single at the same time, and looking back just as well because although I always fancied him like crazy, I’m not sure we would have been so well suited back then. Fast forward 30 years, we’ve both matured and are both divorced with similar aged children, who get on well. We don’t live together but have been together for 4 years now and he’s perfect ❤️ He’s funny, kind, thoughtful, helps me with all the stuff I can’t do, clever, hardworking and still utterly gorgeous. He’s also currently supporting me through cancer diagnosis and treatment and I literally couldn’t manage without him. So yeah, I’ve ended up with the one I dreamt about 30 years ago and I count my blessings every day ☺️❤️

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