Is it too late to make amends?

[Twisterchrista]

We moved into a new house 3 weeks ago. I met one set of neighbours who are lovely and have been very welcoming.
However the neighbours on the other side have made it clear they have no intention of being polite or civil in any way.
I have said hello to the lady, which was ignored, I then posted Christmas cards to everybody on the road at the weekend and received cards back from everybody but this couple.
I have been racking my brains to figure out what could have caused this. We are a quiet family with one older child and there has not been any DIY noise at all as of yet to have caused resentment. In fact the previous family had 6 children and I’m sure were extremely loud to live next door to.
However today I have found dog poop in my back garden. This couple are the only people on the road with a dog. It definitely isn’t fox or cat poop. We were also woken every hour during the night by a loud blast of music for 15 seconds or so each time, against our bedroom wall. There has been loud banging all morning from their house too.
This has upset me a lot because it feels personal but I’m scared of a fall out.
I am considering speaking to other neighbours but I’m concerned they may be friends and it may make things worse if they tell them. My husband naturally wants to knock at their door and have it out with them but I know this is the worse possible thing to do.
We moved away from our home town almost 2 hours away for my husbands new job and it feels ruined. I just want to go home but we can’t afford to move again. I feel like they are going to make our life hell and I don’t know what to do, please help.

You made amends if you’ve made a mistake. You haven’t made a mistake. Your neighbours sound like absolute nightmares! And I suspect they are not people you will be able to have a reasonable conversation with.

Well you probably now know why the last lot left

That sounds worrying, indeed.
Keep a record of events.

Just don't try anymore.
My next door neighbour stopped saying hello back aswell for no reason, so now I just walk past.
They are neighbours not friends, not everyone has to get on.

The music thing is weird though? I would mention that whilst passing.

My husband naturally wants to knock at their door and have it out with them but I know this is the worse possible thing to do.

On what planet is that the 'worse possible thing to do'?

If someone was playing music like that nextdoor to me, I wouldn't have even waited until the morning to discuss it.

They might just be odd types but the 15 seconds of loud music periodically through the night can’t be anything other than deliberate. I’d go round, or send your DH round, the neighbours have demonstrated they don’t want to be friends, so nothing to lose.

Thanks for all your replies, I have chosen to give up but it upsets me after 3 weeks there are already issues and this is supposed to be our forever home. My husband can be hot headed and I think if he confronts them it may make us look like trouble to other neighbours, plus people like this may enjoy knowing we’re upset by their actions and continue to do it. I don’t want it to turn into tit for tat basically.

Well someone has to speak to them and if it's not you or your husband then who?

If he tends to be 'hot headed', he'll have to sit and think about how a mature man with a wife and child would speak to them and do it that way.

See what they say and then take it from there, although it doesn't look like your chances of being happy while living next door to them are going to be high

Just go and knock the door and talk to them.

At least then you'll know if their behaviour is intentional and where you stand.

You need to speak to them about the music

If your husband is hotheaded, go yourself - wish them a happy Christmas and calmly remind them that you can hear it so please use headphones if playing music at night.

I’d leave the dog poo this time.

But start making a note of everything.

Don’t make yourself miserable by assuming they will be nightmare neighbours, they may just be a bit weird and rude. Rather than ignore them, just politely say hello when you see them - it will help keep channels of communication open to manage any issues going forward

But do put on your big girl pants and go see them.

A ring doorbell and CCTV on the back, they sound like nutters.
Ignore them as much as possible and just get on with life, don't make any adjustments for them at all.

I don't understand why you wouldn't just knock on the door and talk to them.

I think you're taking the Christmas card bit a little too personally, that bit probably isn't you.

If you don't want to speak to them about the music/noise then I'd just back off and leave them alone for a bit and see if that helps. They don't want to be friends and that's fine, don't take it so personally.

As for the noise, see how it goes over the next few weeks. Don't assume that everything is ruined three weeks in! If the noise continues, then you'll need to agree on a course of action.