"Listen, ..."

[NinnyNewName]

Since when did it become necessary to start a sentence with "listen", and does it drive anyone else mad?

@Letsallscreamatthesistene

I do it when I want someones undivided attention and I want them to pay attention to the point im making. Its very effective when used well.

If someone started a sentence with “listen” I would say “no”. Or “why”?

And surely if you want someone to pay attention you need to make what you’re saying interesting?

Not demand that they “listen”.

@givethatbabyaname

So patronising.

Almost always used by men, of course.

Yes, I think you're right. I don't think I've heard a woman start with "listen".

I agree. It comes across as so rude.

@LittleOverWhelmed

Shoot me now. I say “listen”. It is only fairly recent. I do hate it when I say it. Only to DS (11) and DH (49). Because neither bloody actually listen. DS has a diagnosed listening / processing issue. I think he gets it from DH and DMIL

I honestly never say things once in this house. I say then 2 or 3 or 1000 times.

Strangely, at work, everyone listens to me. Quite frightening. I never need to say “listen”…

So did the expert who diagnosed your DS’s listening / processing issue suggest you started your sentences with “listen!” to get his attention?

Is it a Dublin / Irish thing though? My parents' generation start sentences with it all the time - more in the sense of You know what / ooh let me tell you something you'll enjoy than the bossy tone people seem to get from it on this thread. Men and women alike. Not a mansplaining thing at all.

@DevonSunsets

I think a tutor mentioned it's actually to do with thought patterns and how people learn/relate to the world.

People who learn visually tend to use looking words 'I see, looking good' , People that learn more by touch/doing with tactile words 'I feel' and people that use hearing with 'listen, sounds good' and so on.

I have just looked it up and

Visual learners. ...
Auditory learners. ...
Kinesthetic learners. ...
Reading/writing learners.

You win most interesting post I have read today!

Listen...

@gingernaut this was the only reason I opened this thread! I'm delighted someone else out there is as mature as me.

Surely you only say it if you think the person you're talking to isn't listening?

"We're completely out of loo rolls, can you pick some up while you're in Tesco?"
"The Tories have lost the by-election blah blah blah blah ..."
"Listen. We need bog rolls NOW."

@warmduscher thats fine, and there I would end the conversation. I use it at work with difficult patients who need to have their attention focussed because their bouncing off the walls. It can be very effective.

I hear politicians doing it all the time. In my head I hear, 'The following is a lie'.

Just realised that in Polish people say "listen" or "I'm listening" all the time. Almost like in English when say uh huh to confirm on the phone they are following the convo (I have a Polish Dad).

[quote Letsallscreamatthesistene]@warmduscher thats fine, and there I would end the conversation. I use it at work with difficult patients who need to have their attention focussed because their bouncing off the walls. It can be very effective.[/quote]
In education, with working with a child with receptive language issues, we would use their name to get their attention.

It’s personal, and best of all, isn’t a command, which is an incredibly rude way to speak to someone for whom communication is challenging.

@LittleOverWhelmed

No, but 11 years of trying pretty much everything to engage his attention (and DH’s) is wearing pretty thin .

There is little point talking to him (them) casually because that just doesn’t work. Even starting the sentence with their names doesn’t work.

Yes, I also hate starting a sentence with the word “listen”, but fairly flat out of answers… as an expert what do you suggest?

I didn’t say I was an expert, I asked what was the advice from the expert who diagnosed him.