Constant worry of being a burden

[PumpkinSpicedLatte]

I have been suffering from severe mental health for over 18 months. Ever since towards the end of my pregnancy.
I am lucky I have a great support network but I have this constant fear of being a burden and the more suicidal I feel, the less I want to talk because I don’t want to be annoying or a pain. I have people who care, my best friend would drop everything and come to me if she needed to and lives 10 mins away by car. But I don’t want to intrude. I know she has work or her own life. And I fear that the more suicidal I feel, the more I’ll maybe ask for help and I don’t want it to get annoying. I make no sense. I went to run away. I don’t know what to do. My Little one is at her dads. I’m by myself out in the dark

Is there a crisis team you can ring?

@Fluffycloudland77 they’re not good. I’ve had numerous failed communications with them. They discharged me 4 days after my last overdose

Are you under the perinatal mental health team? They tend to be better staffed and resourced. Have you rung the Samaritans? You might find it easier to talk to a stranger. Do reach out to someone

Ring your best friend. She’ll want to know you feel this way.