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Help - self isolating with toddler and newborn

2 replies

Afreshstart2021 · 12/12/2021 14:33

Advice needed please, or a good shake.
DP tested positive two weeks ago, self isolated. Me and ds 2 and ds 5 weeks tested negative until a week later, when me and older ds tested positive. Luckily minor symptoms for both of us.
However, I have five more days of self isolation and am really struggling. DP back at work in week so it’s me on my own in very small house with tiny garden from 7-5. Older ds is a real handful at the moment - he’s very unsettled after arrival of baby brother and also by DP being away isolating (which in the end didn’t work anyway!).
I’m crying all the time. I wake up each morning knowing that each day is going to be shit, trying to balance baby feeding with difficult toddler, trying to instigate games/arts and crafts when ds2 would rather watch tv, but he gets bored of that then starts being naughty. He was really naughty a few days ago and hit the baby, hasn’t done that since but I can’t relax at all.
Had bad PND with baby number 1 after terrible birth and feeding problems, baby number 2 much more straightforward in that regard so thought I’d escaped PND but I can feel it all flooding back.
I feel like a total failure, and so guilty about amount of tv being watched. Am exhausted too, baby wakes every 3 hours at night normally and takes 45 minutes to finish feeding and go to sleep.

Sorry, I know people have it tougher than me. Am so fed up. Can’t stop crying at the thought of another 5 days.

OP posts:
MouseholeCat · 12/12/2021 15:12

You don't need to apologise for feeling low in this situation. It sounds incredibly difficult and it must be taking everything you have to get through each day right now.

It sounds like the TV time is a temporary thing that's helping you to manage your older DS. When you feel guilty about it try and remember that it's not forever and you're just in survival mode right now.

No particular advice but as someone going through PND my heart goes out to you managing in this situation. Make sure you reach out for help for your PND as soon as you can if you think it's coming back.

You really are doing an amazing job in an utterly crappy situation.

Bloatstoat · 12/12/2021 15:13

Please be kind to yourself. Just having a newborn and a toddler is hard enough without adding covid and isolation into the mix!

When you had PND in the past, what sort of treatment did you have? Could you contact your GP and/or health visitor by phone? If you feel it's starting again it's good to get support as soon as possible.

Honestly, I would allow some extra TV for now. When my second baby was born she had terrible colic and used to cry for hours, my eldest watched so much YouTube he started getting a bit of an American accent Blush But it wasn't forever, and it hasn't done any harm. Do what works to get you through the next few days, things will get better - don't add extra pressure on yourself for things you 'ought' to be doing, I'm prone to this and it only ends up making me feel worse. You are not a failure, you are tired and ill and only a few weeks post partum, you are actually doing a great job just getting through the days Flowers

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