WWYD - new job and TTC

[Mushrooms0up]

I’m hoping to gather some opinions as I’m going round in circles and it’s driving me crazy!

I’ve been working in my current role for about 10 years and whilst I absolutely love the team, the actual job is super stressful (client demands, billing targets, timesheets). I also said I would stay in my current role until I had a baby as the mat leave benefits are great (as are the pension contributions).

However, a job has come up (that I’m in the final interview stage for) for a niche role that I think I would really enjoy and it is very very rare to be offered. However, it’s only a two year fixed contract (with potential to be permanent but no guarantees). I’m confident that in 2 years if it wasn’t made permanent I could get a job in a similar role
To what I’m currently doing.

The pay for both roles is about the same (and good) but more scope for progression in my current stressful role, but not sure id went the ‘next level’ job anyway.

The problem is me and DH have just started TTC!! I could put this on hold for a bit but I’ve no idea how maternity leave works for a fixed term contact, so either I annoy the new employer or hold off TTC for 2 years.

The other issue is I’m 30 and have PCOS so it’s probably going to take awhile - we could start trying now and it take 3 years anyway but it might not!

We have decent savings but not enough for me to take unpaid mat leave.

WWYD in these circumstances? I really can’t decide at all.

Do what will make you happy now. Getting pregnant is an unknown. I wish you all the luck ttc

Hopeful bump

If it were my decision then i would stay in the role i were currently in, especially if, as you say, the maternity and pension input is good. While the 2 year contract is obviously a progression why add that stress of the unknown to what may well be a stressful period TTC. I would re look at my options once little one were here and that dynamic has been established.
Obviously there are many different ways this whole scenario could play out, with all the potential pros and cons to both but unfortunately none of us have the benefit of foresight, so if it were me i would err on the side of caution.

Go for the new role. TTC.

You will not regret having a baby and you have no idea how long it will take to get pregnant. Best case scenario you’re pregnant tomorrow - that’s still 9 months in a role you’re not absolutely happy with

For me, having a family is the most important thing in my life, although i would also like a decent career too... im 30 now and have been broody for years! Started uni at 27 and kept telling myself that family will happen once graduated and settled in a career (id have been about 32 when start trying) anyway... decided im not going to plan life anymore as you never know whats going to happen (covid started) and i fell pregnant last year.. we have out baby girl..still carrying on with uni.. point is..dont plan so much..decide whats most important to you like you said it might take a while.. if i were u, id go for the new job and start trying.. you will still get maternity pay x

Thanks everyone - most people seem to think I should go for it!

Does anyone happen to know how mat leave even works for a fixed term role? (I will also Google!)

Op I'm of a different opinion the stress of trying to conceive while trying to learn a new job and new people coupled with the potential financial impact of unpaid maternity leave would be too much for me!!!

Plus If you get pregnant straight away the exhaustion that comes with pregnancy will make a new job tougher!

Do NOT put off TTC would be my advice. I'm the same age as you and DH and I are two years into an infertility journey, fuelled by my PCOS and other issues. It's impossible to know when you'll fall pregnant and it's just not worth delaying in my opinion. Best of luck! X

@Mushrooms0up I am in the exact same position. After a LOT of deliberation I have decided to stay in my current role as I figured that starting a new job is always stressful (probably not on a par with my current job but likely in a different way) and the security is something that doesn’t make sense for me to give up right now (literally just started TTC this month). Such a tricky one as you just don’t know how long TTC will take. Maybe push for more money with the new role and see if that could justify it

@HelloPippa I’m leaning towards staying in current role (I think). I had a real chat with DH over the weekend and we both said baby would take preference and we don’t want to to stop TTC, so given I have a three month notice period the timing just really isn’t great.

Hoping for a fairly quick BFP as if it takes over 2 years I’ll be kicking myself!!

I think you should stay.

HA I feel you. I feel like I physically cannot do my current job for two more years. In fact the job will probably be affecting my ability to get pregnant with the stress 😂 but onwards and upwards - good good luck to you

If it was me, and I am struggling with fertility, then if the new job came with significantly better pay and benefits or brought something extra like 4 day week, then I would take it. Otherwise I would stay put. Especially so with only a 2 year contract.

One other consideration would be if I hated my current job then I would move regardless.

Thanks all - pay is almost exactly the same but benefits are significantly better at current job.

But exactly @HelloPippa the stress!! It’s almost reached like a Stockholm syndrome where I can’t really imagine actually quitting?! It’s bizarre. Fingers crossed for both of us!

(I’ve also told myself if I end up not having kids in the next 4 years I’ll just quit and go travel the world or something, so I have that hahaha)

I would stay but thats because we literally couldnt afford for me to take mat leave unless its significantly paid. I get 16 weeks full pay where I am now and have been saving since the first lockdown to help me take further months as I'm the main earner.

Wish I could leave my job now but I'm 30 and weve been ttc since august and just have to hope it happens soon because I'd have to go back straight away (as in weeks) if I wasnt getting enhances mat pay. I think most places require you to have been there for 2 years by the time you go off in order to get any kind of enhanced pay.

It's difficult isn't it. We're 2 years into ttc / 9 months in IVF. I want to leave my job, but it seems impossible now. Obviously there's no way of knowing what happen over the next few years. If only there was a way of having a little look just to check 😬

Will you regret not going for the new niche role? What if ttc takes a while and you’re still in the same old job 2 years later? So what if you get the new job and fall pregnant, win win?

@mumsie8

If it were my decision then i would stay in the role i were currently in, especially if, as you say, the maternity and pension input is good. While the 2 year contract is obviously a progression why add that stress of the unknown to what may well be a stressful period TTC. I would re look at my options once little one were here and that dynamic has been established. Obviously there are many different ways this whole scenario could play out, with all the potential pros and cons to both but unfortunately none of us have the benefit of foresight, so if it were me i would err on the side of caution.

I agree with this..

I would not underestimate the comfort/security of good mat leave policy.

If you have no joy in 12 months then l'd pause ttc naturally while you wait for diagnosis/IVF/whatever and in that time get into a new role with good maternity.

I thought I was on easy street with 6 months full pay 3 months statutory.
While i know I am VERY fortunate...now I am "looking down the barrell" of 14 months mat leave, I am thinking hard about finances and still it's not as comfortable as I'd like.

@Mushrooms0up I spend too much time fantasising about quitting my job and moving somewhere remote to start living off the land 😂😂 whatever helps eh.

@ sorry to hear it’s taking this long and good luck to you!

That was to @CurbsideProphet