Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Please help me help dn

49 replies

strawberriesarenot · 08/12/2021 20:37

My nephew has indicated to me that he is miserable. He has had severe depression before, notably in 3rd year uni. He nearly quit, but hung on and got a 2.2 He graduated straight into the pandemic, and despite applications by the dozen, and using his university re CV help can find no work but covid testing at an airport. This is his 2nd winter of it, and he says he can't stick it much longer. The work is outsourced to an agency, its zero hours, and freezing cold. How can I help him? It seems to me he needs resetting on a career path. He's done bar work and odd shifts of ecology survey work and a lot of wildlife volunteering. He has been applying for NHS admin jobs but having no experience except good literacy and organisation skills, never gets anywhere.
Is there any place he can train for such things?
I hate to hear him so miserable. He was a very bright boy, musical, fluent French, fond of reading, well spoken. He lost his way after a shattering love affair 2 years ago and hasn't found it since.

OP posts:
ArblemarchTFruitbat · 08/12/2021 20:44

I'm sorry to hear this. Has he considered a customer service or hospitality role where he could gain some admin skills on the side? Not perhaps his forever job, but something that's in demand at the moment and would broaden his skill set - and could be a proper full-time contract in a reasonable working environment.

tensmum1964 · 08/12/2021 20:52

Could he privately tutor children in French or teach a musical instrument. I got my daughters maths tutor from tutorful. They seem to get a good hourly rate.

strawberriesarenot · 08/12/2021 20:53

He has applied for so many such jobs. He is in the North, they say workers are lacking, but not there. He has done bar work at festivals all through university, and a few months in Tesco, just to help him finance himself.
He can't talk to his parents. They don't get on, thinking he wasted his time at uni. (He was down for a 1st.) He's only got me.

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

strawberriesarenot · 08/12/2021 20:57

Yes, dh tutors online maths, and has got him signed up for French, but nothing and it's been months now. He plays a flute (very well, passed all the grade exams with distinction) but I know music teachers myself that are struggling to find work and they are experienced.
I was wondering if there was any one I could pay for some sort of life advice.
I am very worried about him self harming. He's done that before. (Not for years).

OP posts:
Gingernaut · 08/12/2021 21:00

There are apprentice and kickstart roles advertised - if he has family support, these might be a way in.

NoSquirrels · 08/12/2021 21:02

What’s his degree, and what does he want to do?

ArblemarchTFruitbat · 08/12/2021 21:05

There are careers coaches but I'm afraid I don't have any recommendations - I don't know if you might be better asking for word-of-mouth recommendations locally?

Has he got to interview stage with any applications, and received any feedback?

You mention temporary work at Tesco - could he talk to any contacts there about a permanent role, or even temp to perm?

If further study is an option, has he thought about going into school teaching? There are bursaries depending on subject - maths is very in-demand.

strawberriesarenot · 08/12/2021 21:05

His degree is biology/ecology.
He wants to save the planet, basically. He's very idealistic.
He's living in a room in a shared house. No financial support from family. I could help him if he would let me, i've got 5k he could have.
I'm very fond of him. I remember the little boy so well.

OP posts:
StormyCornishSeas · 08/12/2021 21:08

Science Technician in a school? Check out the Cleapss website for jobs.
Guessing he likes science... due to his degree. Then as he gets settled introduce himself to the MFL department to see if they want this help. Or maybe Music department for his help in instruction on school orchestra etc.

ArblemarchTFruitbat · 08/12/2021 21:10

Bursaries are definitely available for science-based PGCEs.

EcoLegg · 08/12/2021 21:12

Has he looked at the Civil Service Jobs website? Getting into the Civil Service at any level will allow him to then apply for internal vacancies. There are lots of apprenticeships and graduate schemes.

JaffavsCookie · 08/12/2021 21:13

So if he is at an airport in northern England ( apologies if he is Scotland as I don’t know about the job situation there) then yes there are lots of other jobs nearby. Is he Manchester, Newcastle or Leeds?, or further south and doing it at a tiny airport. I know you don’t want to identify him but giving the airport may help with suggestions.

Redburnett · 08/12/2021 21:14

It is sad to hear parents are not very supportive.
Would teaching be a possibility for him?
If not perhaps a Masters with a vocational slant that might lead to a job? Something in IT maybe?
I know Masters often ask for a 2.1 but if has something else to offer, eg experience there may be possibilities.

FictionalCharacter · 08/12/2021 21:44

Good on you for supporting him.
I can only advise him to keep applying for jobs, even if he ends up applying for hundreds before he gets something better. However many he applies for he needs to take care with each application, making it look like each vacancy is just what he’s looking for and he’ll be perfect for them! I’ve binned many an application that was clearly written for another vacancy, not the one I’m shortlisting for.
I applied for over 80 jobs before I got my first one post-graduation and that was years ago.
I hope he gets something better soon.

NoSquirrels · 08/12/2021 21:49

Why is he applying for NGS admin jobs if he wants to work in ecology or conservation?

How2Help · 08/12/2021 21:59

If he is near Newcastle the Lighthouse Lab were looking for staff. Some require no experience but hopefully a science background and covid testing experience might put him at an advantage. I’m not sure there are current vacancies but worth keeping an eye out or joining LinkedIn etc?

careers.nuth.nhs.uk/your-career/integrated-covid-hub-north-east

onlyreadingneverposting8 · 08/12/2021 21:59

Poor lad - I really feel for him and don't even know him!! My eldest is 3rd year of uni and so worried about finding a job - she's applying and applying. I keep telling her she's doing the hardest thing - trying for a career job straight out of uni. My next is working after A levels and also looking for his "career pathway". It's so tough for them all atm.

Back to your nephew - just keep telling him he's doing really well staying mentally on an even keel - that is THE single most important thing and he should be patting himself on the back everyday that he's got to where he is.

If he wants to work in conservation/ecology then I'd be focusing on any work or work experience he could get in that area. Zoos, country houses, parks, councils, charities. If it's unpaid work experience then I'd suggest he supplement that with anything he can do that he doesn't hate! Whether it be supermarket work or otherwise.

lollipopsandrainbows · 08/12/2021 22:04

What about the NHS graduate scheme? Starting salary is £23k and they move around roles. Alternatively look at NHS subsidiary companies - those who provide services for the NHS but aren't part of the NHS. So community interest groups, academic science networks, prison healthcare? Or even become a 111 call handler...it's how I got my foot in the NHS door many many...many moons ago.

MMMarmite · 08/12/2021 22:06

What did he study?

TerribleCustomerCervix · 08/12/2021 22:26

Environmental Health?
Environmental Health and Safety?

strawberriesarenot · 08/12/2021 22:27

Thanks so much, lots of help here. He has done a lot of conservation volunteering, and a bit of paid work, bat surveys and reptile surveys, but it's very seasonal. He has been thinking he could work for NHS which he adnires very much (his grandpa who he adored was NHS and I think the company would suit him) and fill in between with conservation, which is v poorly and underfunded. He just needs a start somehow. It's easier for me to be a friend than his parents. They have their own problems and were very disappointed with his 2. 2. He just seemed to chuck everything and they had tried so hard to support him with not much money. I will see him at Christmas and was hoping to have some ideas to put forward. Thanks for this so much.

OP posts:
TheresACrackInEverything · 08/12/2021 22:27

I'd agree about looking at the Kickstart scheme. The deadline for employers to apply bid this month, so there are likely to be a few coming on stream. I do feel fior him. A lad I know dropped out during lockdown, over halfway through. So well done him for asking the degree through. Lots will have undershot what they hoped to get. He's lucky he has you at least.

thesandwich · 08/12/2021 22:32

Worth him contacting the national careers service.
Also, is he in LinkedIn? Following companies that interest him? Could he do voluntary work in organisations that interest him?
He could improve his skills with free on line courses- futurelearn, coursera, Google etc.

PollyannaWhittier · 08/12/2021 22:37

How about a paid traineeship with a wildlife charity ? They can lead in to a career in conservation.
eg www.nottinghamshirewildlife.org/get-involved/working-nature-trainee-scheme