Year 7 Whats App

[MarysEasyCooking]

Does your Y7 ds or dd have a form WA group? I know that WA is 16+ but all the kids are using it to stay in touch and not being on WA means you're left out. We don't allow TT or any of the other social media apps but WA is very tricky to deny as that is where all the conversations happen.

Ds goes to a good secondary with generally good behaviour and happy kids but OMG, the WA group shock.

Swearing, rudeness, and some borderline explicit gifs and videos being shared.

We do spot checks every few day, which ds knows and he has been very good not to get drawn into the gif spamming and general rudeness but answers or asks the occasional homework and after school club question.

Do most parents keep an eye on their dc communications? Or not? How do you navigate this?

Not a chance. She struggles with friends etc stuff anyway, so there’s no way I’m inviting it into our house unmoderated.

@womanity

Not a chance. She struggles with friends etc stuff anyway, so there’s no way I’m inviting it into our house unmoderated.

Thanks womanity, how does your dd arrange meet ups or stay in touch? By SMS?

Mine is y9 and I started monitoring the whole class chat in y7 but then lost the will. I think she did too, I don't think she reads it much . Sometimes when she's with her mate they will message on it. I don't think you can care too much about profanity once they're at secondary- all that will happen is they hide it from you . I find it better to let it go but try and keep her a bit open with me

Mine hasn't had any drama. There was once a bit of a spat when someone added in someone toxic from another class but dd quite cleverly set up a new group chat and everyone left and joined hers instead

Also wouldn't worry about being called a nerd . That's a badge of honour for dd.

I think it's been good generally for her having WhatsApp tbh

I didn’t realise whatsapp was 16+ (I don’t have kids!) but my friends kids who have a phone (age 11+) all use it because it doesn’t charge them for sending photos in the way that text messaging can. It’s the only way I contact them (totally clean and innocent messaging only!!).

Fair enough @tootyfruitypickle, it's my PFB so I might just be a bit pearl clutching . They are all still so immature and let loose on social media it just seems quite crass. I guess, I'll have to let him navigate it but remind firmly not to share anything inappropriate. I must say I'm also really surprised at all the talk about who is hot and not but then maybe that's a bit hypocritical as in my time, my friends and I were definitely discussed boys a lot and had crushes at that age.

@emmathedilemma

I didn’t realise whatsapp was 16+ (I don’t have kids!) but my friends kids who have a phone (age 11+) all use it because it doesn’t charge them for sending photos in the way that text messaging can. It’s the only way I contact them (totally clean and innocent messaging only!!).

It used to be 13+ but the minimum age was increased to 16+ a few years ago.

@MarysEasyCooking I'm like that too and these were all new kids to me as we moved so I was a bit shocked, as was dd with all the swearing. But she's a good kid, no harm done and she works hard and likes being known as brainy. WA is all part of growing up imo

I feel sorry for kids that so few parents give a shit about them online. Is weird to me. I don't want my kids around those kids really. Once they get to e.g. year 10 they are self selecting and have nothing to do with those kids.

Best to skip it IMO.

In my experience if you can try and hold off until year 8, its better as by then all the big class groups of Yr6/7 have died down.

My DD has had it for about 2 months. I cant say that I like it and I've been shocked at the amount if swearing on there, but from what I understand, they are hearing these words being spoken everyday anyway & from what my DD tells me what's written on the back of the toilet door is just as bad.

I would prefer it if she didn't have it, but I think if you have restrictions in place & check regularly this definitely helps.

I'm always shocked at how some parents allow their kids to have their phones in their bedrooms at night though?. Surely the only thing you want your child to be doing at night is sleeping? Call me old fashioned, but isn't that just asking for trouble? I just don't get it?!

Dd has limits on her phone, not for WhatsApp as actually she ignores lots of that, but her issue is with Pinterest and TikTok as she gets really obsessive about scrolling certain things / themes. So she has a time limit on many things on her phone and it's shut down completely at 8pm and is rendered useless ! . And it is kept down stairs overnight . I only unblock it for sleepovers .

Have it, don’t have it. Don’t expect school to deal with it!

My Y7 is in a few whatsapp groups but it's mostly innocent nonsense and emojis.
I'm amazing most of her friends with seemingly nice parents, have Snapchat, TikTok and Instagram - not a chance that's happening here.

@MarysEasyCooking
Yes, SMS and, incredibly, voice calls! I’m perfectly happy for her to do 1-2-1 chats, calls etc, just no big groups.

Also no tiktok, Snapchat etc.

They’re far too young to be trusted in y7 IMO.

Basically what toothyfruit said, my Y7 has it and my elder DC had it at same age. Really not concerned by swearing, they’re like this verbally amongst themselves and it does no harm, but then I swear all the time so am a bit biased. We’re deluding ourselves if we think they’re sweetness and light away from us, WhatsApp actually gives you a bit of insight into the reality!

I monitor it relatively frequently but it’s just boring AF. For my DC phones stay downstairs overnight anyway but there hasn’t really been any particular drama on the big groups, if anything the drama I hear happens on the smaller groups when friends fall out. Most of the time it’s important for social aspect of staying in the loop. Also quite invaluable for keeping you in the loop.

Not allowed Snapchat here but I allow TikTok - mainly because I like it. We use it together on my iPad.

Also we solved Instagram debate by our cat ‘having Instagram’ which I then manage as such int hat it’s linked to my account. DD quickly found she wasn’t actually interested in Instagram but now the friends want our cat to do more stories…

Mine doesn't have Instagram or Snapchat and accepts my reasons why. She doesn't need TikTok but she actually mainly uses it for book recommendations, there's a YA community called booktok (areas in bookshops devoted to this )That's what she follows the most. Also a lot of space related content is interesting to her . She's always coming out with info and when I ask her where she says TikTok. mn hates TikTok but it's been a positive here so far but I do have a dd who has specific interests and so doesn't follow the random stuff so much