Tips for surviving the mundane grind of motherhood?

[CastMeAdrift]

I enjoy being a mum. I like doing crafts and baking and going on beach walks with them. I love seeing their personalities develop and emerge. And I love them so much it hurts sometimes.

But, my god. The daily grind is getting to me. The school run, the what to cook for dinner the cleaning, the washing, the squabbling, the hobby organising, the lunch box, the homework etc etc.

My weeks pass in a blur fitting it all around work. My DH is good and does his share of school runs and hobby ferrying, does washing and shopping etc. though I definitely the most of the life admin and he’s so shit at clearing up anything that’s not in the kitchen.

What are your tips to survive this period of my life? Or simple solidarity will do. I know it won’t last forever but mine are 3 and 6 so a while to go. I know there is no magic solution. I can’t throw money at it sadly. All I have is a cleaner once a fortnight which doesn’t make a difference as the place is instantly trashed, but at least I know the bathroom has had a scrub!

very similar to my two in age so I hear you!

I’d look at reducing the extra curricular stuff. Mine do after school club and one other thing at the moment. I drop off everyday and my DP picks up which means there’s no faffing, no thinking needed, no mental load. Obviously there are exceptions, but these are very much the exception, we stick to it.
With dinners, sometimes we eat later so we can have something more adventurous. Usually at least one week day. It gets us out of the shepherds pie/spaghetti Bol/chilli routine

Thank you for all the solidarity! There are some good tips. To the PP that said I should keep pushing their boundaries, you’re absolutely right. I think I might start serving up a note adventurous meal once a week. And I like the variation on a theme approach to planning.

I do run which I took up in lock down and was my saviour. I really enjoy the time to myself and I’m lucky to live in AONB so enjoy the beautiful scenery. But finding the time to fit it in is hard, especially in the winter as I won’t run in the dark (scaredy-cat).

I think the extra curricular stuff probably needs to drop. But DD really enjoy the ones she does so I feel mean stopping her. Especially as they don’t cost much (rainbows and rugby). She does swimming as well which is expensive but as we live by the sea I feel that is so important and one she has to do.

Get hobbies that have nothing to do with your dc.
Get out in the evening no matter how tired you are. An evening class? Learn a new skill
Will boast your self confidence

That daily grind doesn’t not stop for another 15 years

One thing that helped me was a shift in mindset, realising that housework (and especially washing) is never actually finished. It's always going round in a cycle, there will always be more to do so it helps to think that jobs don't have to be always done/finished/completed. Cut yourself some slack. Also, if I'm the only one who's going to do certain jobs, I'll do them when I feel like it and if anyone wants it done sooner they can do it themselves (they never do!).

Here for the solidarity. It doesn't help that it's been really wet and freezing this winter and Everyone Is Always Poorly. Makes the grind seem extra bleak.

I've outsourced the meal planning to hello fresh next week on the basis that everyone keeps asking me what's for breakfast/lunch/tea like I am a member of staff.

Also just to say podcasts really get me through the endless folding stuff, cooking and endless clean up, scrubbing of sinks/baths etc.

One podcast is a language (Irish) one is a work related one. I have a few hobby related ones (clutterbug, for housework motivation). Gives my brain something to do other than seethe about how much I hate the task in hand

Totally agree with @frugalkitty - instead of thinking of tasks done/not done, think in %s and start being content with 80%

The other thing that helps me is job twinning so if I’m sorting the laundry then I’m listening to a favourite podcast. If I’ve got to go to softplay then I meet a friend there. Do ironing in front of a favourite tv program. That sort of thing

It helps my brain to reframe whatever the thing is by thinking about the pleasurable aspect rather than the drudge.