Suggestions for bedtime hell with 6 and 2

[asha456]

Please help 😔What can I do?

2YO used to go down like an angel at 6.30. Then she learned to climb out of the cot. Now she just gets up x 1000 and won't go to sleep until 9pm. She then comes in at least once overnight and then up at 5. I'm exhausted. She just won't stay in her bed. The whole evening is a battle.

6YO gets jealous and comes in if I spend too long trying to settle the other one. Has anyone been here and can give any suggestions?

Can you put a babygate on 2yos door?

If they're climbing out of the cot I would also switch to a toddler bed if you can, they could hurt themselves.

Yes sorry she's in a proper bed now with a little sidebar thing. I think she would just climb a stair gate as well unfortunately.

How long since 2 year old switched to climbing out/in toddler bed? If it's not been too long I'd just keep doing the same old (calmly taking back to bed every time she gets out, no talking, being as boring as possible) and assume it will get better once the novelty of the new bed has worn off.

Keep taking her back to bed, don’t make eye contact, don’t speak. No fuss, no attention. Put a stair gate up too. It will at least slow them down.

630 is very early for 2yo

Sticker chart!!

Both mine were keen to come out of bed. We agreed on a carrot and stick approach.

Stick - if they get out of bed they're taken straight back into bed without eye contact or any words. It's not fun for you but gets the message across that they don't get attention for it. You have to be consistent and keep doing it.

Carrot - sticker chart in their room. Every time they do a good bed time and stay in their bed all night they get a sticker. At the end of the week they get a treat. Worked first night with both mine and we didn't need the stick.

My youngest was so funny doing it. She was desperate for her Elsa school bag. You could see the concentration on her face as she resisted the urge to get out of bed lol

Thank you for the suggestions. Perhaps it has coincided with her needing a bit less sleep. She still has a decent nap in the middle of the day and is a mess if she misses it. I could try holding off trying to put her to bed until 8 or so. Can you share your routine? Maybe I can push dinner back as well as they eat around 5 or 530. I could give a more substantial snack after school and then dinner at 6 or something.

She's just turned 2 and I don't think would get the concept of a sticker chart. I'll try that for the older one, though, to try to stop her coming in and disturbing things.

It has just been a couple of weeks so I think i have to be more boring and be coming with taking her back rather than caving and shush-patting or letting her in my bed.

Do you have someone to help? If yes, take a kid each. If not, I’d give 2yo a screen while you focus on 6yo and yes to later bedtime.
I would put 6yo down first and give them as much fuss and attention as possible, and yes to sticker/reward chart. Then I’d follow bedtime routine with 2yo and sit on the bed the first few nights, then the floor and edge closer to the door.
I have a 7, 5 and 2yo so I feel your pain!

I would even say to 6yo you’ll check on them after settling 2yo if you think it would help them settle. If not and you think they’ll try and wait up then dont 😬😅

6.30 is too early if she's having a daytime nap.
You need to put her down a little later and get a dog gate.

@Nighttimenope

Do you have someone to help? If yes, take a kid each. If not, I’d give 2yo a screen while you focus on 6yo and yes to later bedtime. I would put 6yo down first and give them as much fuss and attention as possible, and yes to sticker/reward chart. Then I’d follow bedtime routine with 2yo and sit on the bed the first few nights, then the floor and edge closer to the door. I have a 7, 5 and 2yo so I feel your pain!

Aha! 6YO down first! I hadn't thought of that, now that could help a lot as I would be less pressured with the other one if 6 yo was settled. Thank you.

DH works away a lot so often it's just me.

I’d put the 6 year old to bed first and then with your two year old put a stair gate on their room (even if they do climb it then it’ll still slow them down) and keep returning them to bed without talking or really acknowledging them; might take a lot of times but it’ll get easier after a few days

My two year old just did this for like 2 months recently when we took the side off the cot, the first month we let her in our bed for ease then I stuck to my guns and took her back every single time even if it was ten times a night. She would get out 20 times before I'd even gone downstairs but now she's going to bed at 7.15 and sleeping 12 hours. If she gets up I return her to bed without talking kiss her and leave. I also got a gro clock and she gets excited when it's yellow and she can wake up. It's hard but perseverance helped me.

My two were not far into 2 when we did the sticker chart. They get the concept really well earlier than we might think.