Have you thought about adoption?

[Chikapu]

Is it really that easy to foster or adopt a child? I see it bandied around on here all the time, if someone mentions that they're struggling to conceive it's immediately brought up as a solution.
Isn't it a long and difficult process with no guarantees?

We do know a couple (now retired) who fostered for decades and somewhere in the process adopted at least four of their former foster children. I say 'at least' as they had several birth children as well, and I can't remember how many of each. I'm guessing that wouldn't happen now?

@Jellycatspyjamas

Drifting expensive process ? It's free... (if adopting in UK, not if wanting to adopt from abroad)

The assessment process doesn’t cost but I was left with a significant legal bill when I adopted, definitely not always free.

The LA paid for a solicitor when BF wanted to contest our adoption order.

We started the adoption process by attending a workshop in the October. We were assigned a social worker in the February, completed our assessment in the June and went to panel and our little boy was placed with us in the July. Everyone we met, social workers, panel, CAFCASS guardian, Foster family were lovely and all wanted to help us. It was intensive but enjoyable. We went into it fully prepared to open our lives up to social services and tell them anything they wanted to know. Maybe we were lucky but it was the best thing we've ever done and I'd do it all again without hesitation.

In my country/jurisdiction, adoption is only free through the state and the state adoptions are mostly for the very tough to match cases I mentioned earlier.

Went through the process twice. Have DS16 and DD13 both adopted at age 11 months.

Compared to the 10 years of TTC which included four unsuccessful cycles of IVF and one miscarriage I actually found the adoption process to be very easy indeed.

It took 18 months from first enquiry/contact with social services to actually bringing our DS home. The second time the process was 12 months from first enquiry to placement.

The formal legal adoption came through 6 months after placement.

The parenting of adopted children can be tough due to their early life experience and we often have to deal with some situations in a different way to how a biological parent would.

I have fostered. It's not the same as adoption and it's not a replacement for having your own children as many placements are short term. You're doing it to help provide a home for a child rather than to fulfill your own needs.