Guide for personal and professional life (?) like 'The Rules' for dating?

[PinkPanther57]

Anything that is some form of 'tough guide' or offers 'Rules' re: boundary setting and general life? Looking for something in a similar vein.

What is it you’re struggling with?

Something to help me professionally (mainly) and personally e.g. When dealing with X DON"T DO XYZ. A simple guide, especially re: boundary setting.

One thing I liked about 'The Rules' was the advice to beef up the suggestions/'turn up the emphasis/volume' if you were a meeker or gentler soul etc. Something super clear in other words, that you can read and absorb from in a hurry.

I just think they're fundamentally different things, though. I mean, my personal opinion of The Rules (which I've not read, but its basic principles permeated out into a million magazine articles) was that it was a load of freakishly sexist reactionary claptrap -- though it sounds as if you found value in it if you are someone who is meek and struggles with boundaries in relationships, which is fair enough, I suppose.

But the workplace is a different kettle of fish -- there you're not playing hard to get and mysterious/alluring. You're there to do a job. There's no workplace equivalent to 'Never call him and seldom return his calls' or 'Never ask a man out'. Being unavailable and apparently uninterested isn't a good look in the workplace.

I mean, I could advise a woman starting out in my field, but that would be specific to my type of work, and the institution. And work 'boundaries' (if you're struggling with picking the slack, say, for a flaky colleague, or being overlooked for promotions, or being given work you shouldn't be) need to be negotiated with your line manager and/or work mentor. I don't think there's any kind of one-size-fits-all handbook.

I agree with Birds, it depends what you're struggling with.

There's "how to win friends and influence people" which sounds incredibly naff but is pretty solid, especially if your problem is that you constantly feel like you're surrounded by idiots and are experiencing a lot of conflict while trying to get your ideas across. Here's the summary: fs.blog/how-to-win-friends-and-influence-people/

There's also "Playing Big" by Tara Mohr, which is good if you doubt yourself at work, want to “unhook” from praise and criticism, and unlearn counterproductive "good girl" habits.

Thank you for suggestions.