How do you feel when colleagues are off sick?

[parrotonmyshoulder]

Especially if you know or suspect it is mental health related?
I need to stop. I need time off or I will end up leaving the job altogether. I am in a complete mess and so are my children. I can’t fix things without being in a better place myself.
But I will leave things undone at work that will mean that others have to do them, or pick up the pieces if they’re not done. Some are time limited. I can’t see how I’ll get better if they’re not done as I’ll keep thinking about them. But I’m not even in a fit state to make a list to help someone else.

I always think a company should run so that someone can go off sick and others pick up the work easily. If that can’t be done it reflects badly on the company NOT the person.

Wouldn’t bother me in the slightest picking up the additional work and I wouldn’t expect to know why you’re off.

Your whole life is more important than one job

I think my fear is ‘everyone’s stressed, why do I need special treatment?’

It isn't being given special treatment taking time off when you are unwel. IT sounds like you have taken steps previously to keep well but it sounds like you need to do more. So take the time that you need and get yourself into a place of good health x

@parrotonmyshoulder

I think my fear is ‘everyone’s stressed, why do I need special treatment?’

It depends where we are. Im a single parent to two teens one at uni. I instantly over empathise with single parents of young children because i remember how stressful it was back then, the constant stress/fear of potentially needing to be in 3 different places at one time! I was a basket case. My job is busy now but NOW i can say no, postpone it, miss it, rearrange it, go on your own. It doesnt have the potential to derail me like it would have 10 years ago.

💐

I would want my colleague to take all the time that they needed to get better and I would do everything I could to step in and do what needed to be done.
I recently supported a colleague who was suffering with mental illness as he refused to take time off, we all did. I really wanted him to take some time off but he didn’t. Thankfully he is much better now.

Nothing is more important than your mental health and wellbeing. Healthy mind , healthy body.
Nobody will judge you any less, infact it takes courage to say " "I' m struggling right now, so l need to take a break. " Its the best thing you can do for yourself and all concerned.
Taking a break, or interruption from work is exactly what you need to allow yourself to rebalance, we are not meant to continuosly rocket through life 100 mph like we feel we should do.
Work will manage, your collegues will just get on with what needs doing, everything will be ok.
l have nothing but empathy towards anyone struggling mentally, l hope you get much support.

If I have no reason to suspect they're faking it, I feel compassion for my poorly colleagues and crack on with covering.

In my experience, people are more likely to fake something physical (e.g. make out that a cold is affecting them far worse than it really is) rather than something mental (because they fear being judged, just like you!) so if I knew you were off with stress, I wouldn't bat an eyelid.

I know plenty of really good people in my line of work who have taken time off for their mental health. It doesn't make me respect them any less. I know they're good at what they do, and that poor mental health can affect anyone.

One of my reportees is off right now. All I want is for her to be ok. I'm covering whatever is needed in the meantime but I'll fight anyone who even hints at negativity about it. She's unwell. Her feeling like she does right now is far worse than anything bad that could happen in work in her absence. I've sent her links to everything the company offers for mental health support and only reached out to tell her about a payrise.