Sat here very emotional. Milk supply just isn't improving

[LookingForTones]

I had surgery on Monday to remove my gallbladder.

Just had another surgery last night because I had a really horrific complication where the bile just leaked into my stomach and caused a bad infection. Not rectified with more surgery.

But ever since Tuesday, my supply has been ridiculous Not even 5mil every 3 hours. I've tried power pumping and it hasn't worked. I was out of it Monday and couldn't express. And yesterday I was in extreme pain, worst ever experienced, and too drugged to even think about it. Today I've been on it again.

Literally nothing is improving my supply. In the week things were hard as I wasn't really eating but still expressing as I should.

I'm so sad. If it doesn't improve soon they'll be giving her formula. She was born extremely prematurely. She's doing so well. How could I have let her down like this? I've never even held her skin to skin, can't even do that for her because of her state. Yet here I am not even able to provide the one thing I knew I could for her. I'm useless just now. To her I really am.

I must admit there's times I didn't do a pump after 3 hours exactly but that's because I'm also caring for disabled DS at home too during the day, but H is helping by working from home a lot. It's just so full on and I feel like we've had a really rough time. Honestly, I'm so unwell and it couldn't have come at a worse time. It's ridiculous. I'm just not able to do it

Has anyone had any success trying something else? Maybe Domperidone? It increases milk supply in some

Thanks for any advice at all

That should read 'now rectified with more surgery'

No advice sorry. Just so sorry you are in this position. You sound amazing and so strong. It must go against every bone in your body to be away from her. I hope it won't be too long until you can do skin to skin. It sounds like you have so much on your shoulders. Have you tried looking at pictures of her when you express? This used to help me. She has still had something from you and that would have done her a world of good

I think the general advice in this situation is to go back to basics with plenty of skin to skin. Are you co-sleeping? If you supplement with formula try not to miss breast feeds at night as this is best for keeping your supply going.

However, this advice can be very disheartening if your circumstances make it tricky. If you consider bottles try pace feeding. Keep persevering with the breast if you want to, plenty of babies mix feed very successfully.

So sorry, I've just read that you can't do skin to skin. Sorry to be insensitive. But advice about persevering if you want to conitune as well as formula stands. Good luck.

It’s only been a day since a major operation, you’ve been in immense pain, no wonder your supply has dwindled.
It really doesn’t matter if your baby has a bit of formula to keep her fed whilst you recover. A few bottles of formula in the early days doesn’t mean you can’t establish successful BF with your baby. It might even be the best thing to take the pressure off yourself.
Just keep putting baby to the breast, keep pumping (if that’s what you decide you want) and try and relax. I’m sure your milk will come back very soon, but if not, remember fed really is best! Your baby wants a happy, healthy mum. That’s more important to her than where her milk is from.
Good luck!

I'm so sorry to hear this OP. Praying things improve for you soon. You've been through hell and back and you are still trying your very best for both of your children.

Im going to go against the grain here and say take the pressure off - it's not your fault at all. If supply has dwindled, by all means keep trying but there's no shame in putting her on formula. Baby just needs milk, she doesn't care where it's from. And you know in your heart that you haven't let her down, not in the slightest!

Just also re-read you can’t hold her at the moment. That’s really tough for you. I echo the pp who said look at photos of your baby whilst you express. My DD was in NICU too and that’s what helped me. Most importantly try and relax. Get yourself a nice cuppa whilst you do it and look at your precious girl on your phone.

Given what your body has gone through I doubt producing milk is high on its agenda OP.

You have done so much for your baby already please don't think breastfeeding is the be all and end all. It really isn't.
You being fit and healthy is the best thing you can do for her. She doesn't need your milk she needs you. You are whats important for her.

OP, how premature was she and is the reason you can’t do skin to skin due to her prematurity? The reason I ask is if she’s that premature she can’t be held they likely won’t give her formula, it will be donor milk.

Have you tried fenugreek

I took nine capsules of Fenugreek (Holland and Barratt) a day on the advice of an NHS breastfeeding specialist. It really worked for me.

You've just had major surgery. I'm not surprised you are struggling with your milk supply. Don't be so hard on yourself. Your body is recovering. Focus on your nutrition, rest, and recovering your strength. If you want to then keep up the pumping. Meanwhile let your baby have formula as needed.

How old is your baby?

Come on OP, your body has taken a real bashing with birth and multiple surgeries. Don't be down on yourself. The best thing you can do for you and your baby is to look after yourself - good food, sleep when you can, try not to stress (easier said than done!)

You can always increase your supply a bit later. What you've given her to date will have done her lots of good. It's not the end of the world if she has a bit of formula or donor milk.

Thank you for the replies, lovely to vent to someone for once

I am trying to eat a lot more now but still in hospital and eating is making me so awfully nauseous. I just want to be back to normal but it's so hard. I had a good sleep today in hospital and my body seemed to singing, as if to say finally, you're resting!

She was born at 23+1, now 5 weeks old. Doing very well but lungs biggest issue of course so just waiting on an op at great Ormond street. She was there for suspected NEC at 1 week old but she doesn't have it

DS is at home and he is too challenging for anyone to help much so it's up to me and H but that's difficult whilst home working for him. No leave left and just unaffordable to take parental leave etc. We have muddled through but it's hellish at times

DS's nursery don't want him back after a few major incidents of him harming other staff members he bites and scratches. He's non verbal and can't understand much. He's very disabled by his autism. No special school place available yet. It's all fight fight fight but it's just so stressful knowing they don't want him. At least they've been told tough luck by council send team

I'm sorry you're going through this but please be rest assured that your baby will also thrive on formula and bond with you. Let your body heal .

for you and your family. Modern formula is very good. I know someone who died after being bottle fed on condensed milk. Mind, DFIL was 86.

I just suppose I don't know anything different. I'm worried how we will eventually bond. I had the most amazing bond with DS and he was breasted for 3 years

Mine are teens now so baby feeding was a long time ago. But neither were breast feed and I've always had the best bond with my dc right from babies. Imo breastfeeding isn't a guarante of bonding, long lasting care, support and lots of hugs is ❤

@LookingForTones

I'm so sorry to hear you are going through this. Firstly, i hope you are recovering well and your DD is doing well. My DD was born in June and although she wasn't a preemie, she was in NICU / SCBU for two weeks as she was very poorly so i really sympathise with you.

From my experience, with a rubbish supply that i had to work really hard to increase:

• Are you using a hospital grade pump. My DD was under the infant feeding team for 3 months and they told me that home pumps are generally no good for increasing supply. I hired the medela symphony for £47 a month and used it for 3 months, including a 20mins pump every 3am. Knackering, but did wonders for my supply. Can you get one on loan from the hospital?

• When pumping, don't look at the output. Weird but if you do, you will affect what you get out. Cover the bottles with socks to hide them filling up and as you can't do skin to skin, can you look at a photo of baby or hold something of theirs you can smell. Make sure you do a 3am pump every day. When i skipped that one, i found it had the biggest impact. I only dropped it at 4months pp.

• Eat lots of oats (if possible), take fenugreek capsules and most importantly drink an absolute tonne of water. I think i am drinking nearly 3.5l a day at the moment.

• when on neonatal, they didn't give my baby formula, they gave her donor milk (until i said i wanted to mix feed) so it isnt a given that she will get formula i think

• There should be a BF specialist either on postnatal or neonatal unit. Can you arrnage to speak to them? They can prescribe domperidone but to warn you results are variable, evidence is mixed and it's usually a bit of a last resort. I know people for whom it didnt work and in the end, i decided to mix feed. At each feed, my baby has 30mins on the breast and then i top her up with 2-3oz of formula. She gets the good stuff from me and what i can't give her, she gets from the formula.

You are doing your best and that's all that matters!Look after yourself

Another saying give yourself permission not to bf. I think you will feel a huge weight off your shoulders if you decide not to. Your body needs to heal, not produce milk. My ds was almost exclusively formula fed as I was very ill after birth. He’s a very healthy happy boy.

Oh my God, you are going through such immense stress.
Please rest a bit, allow your body to heal and feed your lovely baby some formula while you recover. You can keep pumping of course as well, but the pressure will be off and you will find that your yield improves.
A bit of mixed feeding is absolutely fine, as is 100% FF. What's not fine is physical, mental and emotional collapse.
Look after yourself.

This all sounds really tough, you poor thing.

I also had success with fenugreek, lots of water, lactation cookies (lots of recipes online, get someone else to make them), I had a breastfeeding herbal tea too. Pumping for less time but more frequently also worked for me.

Good luck and if it doesn’t happen, don’t sweat it, you’ve been through so much.

Goodness me. You've been through so much. Although usually the body prioritises milk production, right now your body is focusing all its energy onto healing and making you well. This may well make your supply dip, but this may be temporary.

I hear your concern for your children and your willingness to make this happen. It's upsetting when things don't go to plan, but you couldn't have planned any of this.

First of all, do everything you can to feel as well as you can. Eat healthy food. Stay hydrated.

Allow yourself to feel however you are feeling can really help. If you feel upset, allow yourself to cry. Releasing your emotions can help to let down your milk. If you can't be with your baby when you are pumping, look at photos of your children. Also, don't look at the pump. Put a sock over the bottle then read a book, watch tv, phone a friend or ask a nurse to sit and chat with you. Being relaxed really can help. It's a marathon, so you're gradually working to build that supply. Putting in the power pumping today is placing your order for tomorrow. Tomorrows pumping will help to up your supply the following day.

Don't lose hope. But don't blame yourself either. Sending you love.

Hi OP,

I'm sort of in a similar position, save that I haven't just had major surgery, but still struggling with the milk supply unfortunately 7

I meant to add, fiddle with the pump settings too.

Adjust the pump so that you feel the tugging sensation and you can relax into the rhythm. Don't feel that you need to whack up the pump full to get a good yield. If the pump is working too hard your body may not respond well - find a pumping method that works for your body.