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OMG my father in law gave us an amazing offer today

132 replies

RosieLeaLovesTea · 28/11/2021 17:46

OMG my father in law gave us an amazing offer today. He lives part time in HK and has made some property investments and sold some. Today we had a video call and he is offering to pay off our mortgage! Wow! What an amazing offer.

Our mortgage is not that high because we bought a doer upper 10 years ago and have been doing it up. It’s risen in value so we have a good amount of equity.

My DH have been talking about moving to a more expensive house in an area with better schools.

If we did this we could probably afford to rent our house out and make some decent money on it because the mortgage is low.

What he would give us would be approx 50% of new house value and we would she a bigger mortgage than now.

I am struggling a bit with the choice cause being mortgage free at 43 feels so freeing!

What would you do?

OP posts:
ssd · 28/11/2021 18:35

@thisplaceisweird

Probably not show off about it on a site where many of the users are struggling to get through the next hour.
Exactly my thoughts

...if its real

Peanutmnm · 28/11/2021 18:35

@thisplaceisweird

Probably not show off about it on a site where many of the users are struggling to get through the next hour.
Nothing has changed for you in the slightest with this posters good fortune. So no need to shit on it. Shes taken nothing from you.

Sometimes OP, nice things happen in life. Its okay to enjoy it and be bursting with happiness about it.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 28/11/2021 18:35

Has he offered to give you money or has he offered to pay off your mortgage? If the latter, it might be that he wants to know you're mortgage free?

I wondered that too. He sounds like a very kind and astute man, but how did he arrive at that amount? Did the amount he wanted to give you happen to roughly correspond with your mortgage or did he ask/find out how much it was and deliberately give you enough to clear it?

I wonder if he might be a little hurt if you ask him about investing it, as it sounds like his plan might be to take away the burden of a mortgage from you and give you a secure, risk-free home. Even though the other plan makes financial sense, it's still maintaining an element of risk.

I'm not saying he's done it for any reasons other than love and kindness, but I think there's quite a big difference in knowing that you've been able to make your DS & DDIL mortgage-free and just knowing that you've given them £50K towards an investment balance sheet - one that could pay off well, but could also potentially leave you no better/worse off if the market crashes or other circumstances don't fall well.

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shiningstar2 · 28/11/2021 18:35

What an amazing surprise from your dfil. I would tactfully check with him whether or not he would be happy with a different plan for the money. Either way, this is marvelous for your whole family and will release money to make life so much easier going forward.

Please ignore those who can't celebrate someone else's good fortune on the internet. Like many people on here I have been desperately poor and also better off. I have never ever, regardless of my own situation, begrudged anyone else their good fortune. I'm sure those who have rained on your parade would not have been disparaging in real life. Enjoy. Flowers

4amstarts · 28/11/2021 18:37

How is he protecting the money (and his DS) in the event you ever divorce?

MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry · 28/11/2021 18:39

What would you do?

Rather than let out your house why don’t you sell it so another family can be owner occupiers rather than having to rent?

Greenhand · 28/11/2021 18:39

It's really refreshing to read a good news post. OP I am happy for you.

AnneLovesGilbert · 28/11/2021 18:41

Be mortgage free. That sounds epic.

TSSDNCOP · 28/11/2021 18:43

What a truly marvellous offer, I'd be on cloud 9 as you are.

Why don't you pay your place down, then take a breather for a few months and go from there.

I am I dire straits, but I'll take a moment to celebrate your good fortune OP.

RedRobin100 · 28/11/2021 18:45

Will he pay mine off too?

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 28/11/2021 18:45

It's sad that some people can't be happy for another person, when it makes no difference to them anyway. I've seen stealth boast threads on here, and this is absolutely nothing like that at all.

In fact, the money is only really one aspect of it: the main question is asking how about a family relationship and how not to upset a loved one - it could just as easily have been about somebody really struggling being given £20 to 'treat yourself and buy something nice' and wondering if they would cause offence by using it instead in the electricity meter, to keep the lights on.

It's also sad that some people's first thought is that he's doing it as a means to exert control over them and keep them dancing to his tune. Nothing in the OP at all gave the hint of him being anything other than a genuinely kind man wanting to look after his family, without any other agenda - believe it or not, there are still plenty of people out there like that.

Yuledo · 28/11/2021 18:46

The rent from your old house would probably pay the mortgage on your new one. Win win.

Mischance · 28/11/2021 18:48

I feel very happy for you. Enjoy the freedom this will bring you.

GoodbyePorpoiseSpit · 28/11/2021 18:48

Jesus I’d be mortgage free! Interest rates are about to go cray cray. Imagine the lovely life and holidays - I’d find that a simple decision!

uncomfortablydumb53 · 28/11/2021 18:48

What a wonderful gift! How kind of him
Security is priceless. In your position I'd sell up and move to the better area
Being a landlord is a minefield and can end up a nightmare with you still being responsible for your own property, I would rather feel " free"

MrsDThomas · 28/11/2021 18:50

Lucky you! Take it and stop overanalysing everything (like MN does).

Rade · 28/11/2021 18:52

Good for him. I imagine his intention was to make life easier for you.

Pay off your mortgage and enjoy life mortgage free instead of saddling yourselves with more debt. I don't know how much your mortgage is but think how your quality of life would improve if you had that cash spare every month.

Mischance · 28/11/2021 18:55

We became mortgage free by virtue of a massive downsize in our 40s - it all happened because my OH was not well enough to continue working full time. The accountant said we should keep our mortgage as we got tax relief on it; but we paid the mortgage off because psychologically it felt like freedom.

JustLyra · 28/11/2021 18:56

Check with your FIL he'd be happy for you to take on another mortgage.

Check if there are any catches/caveats - does he want to live with you when he's older? Will he expect to visit whenever he wants and stay for however long? Will he expect a say on anything to do with your house? Most importantly - will he expect to comment on everything you do forever more on the basis he funded your house?

Being a landlord of one property is nowhere near as lucrative as many people think. Make sure you properly look into it. It's expensive - gas certs, maintenance and repairs. Can you afford to replace the boiler next week if it goes? Can you afford months of no rent and expensive court orders and baliffs if your tenants stop paying?

Mostly though I'd double check that your FIL would be happy with you taking on an even bigger mortgage than you have now. If he wants his son to be mortgage free for financial security then he may not be (and that would be understandable).

TubbyCustards · 28/11/2021 18:59

Some posters on here are just downright weird. Are only poor people allowed to post?

Hollyhead · 28/11/2021 19:00

You don’t need to rush, I’d live mortgage free for a bit to see what it feels like and save the money towards whatever you do next. It also gives the time for the dust to settle on it all and for you to get the feel of the lie of the land with FiL.

Cornishclio · 28/11/2021 19:13

It is a lovely offer but I would wait for the money to be forthcoming before doing anything as sometimes people offer then think again. I would also want to be sure that he is not giving you the money with strings or because he wants you to be mortgage free and may not be happy with you wanting to move and take on a bigger mortgage. As he has been quite specific with only giving you enough to repay your mortgage rather than a certain amount this may be what he has in mind so renting out your house and taking on a big mortgage may not be what he had intended for you to do. I also think becoming a BTL landlord needs some thinking about as you need to consider dodgy tenants, the maintenance of a place lived in by renters and the tax implications.

DoubleTweenQueen · 28/11/2021 19:14

@RosieLeaLovesTea Life is incredibly tough for most people, financially, emotionally, health-wise - very, very few are without pain and stress in life - so it really gladdens the heart to hear that someone is getting a boon to their existence which will ease their way. I don’t think anyone has the right to begrudge it.

I think it’s a wonderful offer, and I hope it will make a significant positive difference to your lives x Exciting!

DoubleTweenQueen · 28/11/2021 19:14

And I would move for schools :)

KirstenBlest · 28/11/2021 19:20

Lucky you. I'm worrying about whether I can afford to switch on the heating