When did your kids stop believing in Santa?

[5thnonblonde]

Just that really. I’m curious! We’re they upset when they twigged? Or was there an extended period of wilful cognitive dissonance? I think I can remember knowing and not wanting to know and pretending to myself I didn’t iyswim

I remember my nephew saying to me when he was about 9 - "I know Santa isn't real, but don't tell my mum that I know because she'll be upset".

DD is 11 (year 6). I genuinely have no idea if she still believes or not. She said some kids in her class say he's not real, but she knows he is. She's quite vocal when she says he's real but I'm not convinced that it isn't, like PPs have said, because she thinks she'll get no presents, or because she wants it to be true so badly.
We've decided we'll tell her next year so she isn't going to high school believing. It makes me sad but actually, I think I'd rather do without the stress!
DS is 9. I think he believes because he'll believe just about anything anyone tells him. He has no critical thinking skills.

My ds is a very young 9 and autistic. We were genuinely worried about him finding out because he loves Christmas and would be devastated. Tbh if we’d known back then he was autistic we would never have pretended Santa was real. It’s genuinely been making us fret as he is a very truth-oriented person. Well, judging by some of the things he’s said to us lately he’s twigged - probably from his school mates. He’s been absolutely fine about it. I think a part of him still believes because he wants to believe but I think he has worked it out, yes.

I think I thought that I wouldn’t get presents from the Santa I knew wasn’t real!

In a way the actual truth that millions of adults voluntarily engage in the same conspiracy is slightly more amazing

Eldest was 7.5 before she worked it out.
2nd child was 9 before she stopped believing.
Youngest 2 boys are 7&5 and still believe.
If they still believe in the last year of high school I'll tell them the truth.

My 20 and 16 year olds still believe, they have 4 younger siblings and genuinely love the magic of Christmas of course they know but they enjoy leaving cookies etc out for Santa and tracking him on Christmas Eve seeing how excited their little brothers are it’s really sweet that they do this. My 2 younger kids are 10 & 11 but still do Santa and probably will for a couple of years yet maybe.

The boys siblings at their dads are much younger so they’ll get to do Santa with them for a while longer which is nice as I think they both enjoy it abs it reminds them of lovely Christmases when they were small.

Reception: all three kids. Two made it until after Christmas in reception but one was definitely disbelieving before, and he was relieved when we stopped pretending for him. No upset, Christmas has still been wonderful - they’re just grateful to real people for their presents!

Primary school, not high school

Oh wow @Bwix! Was it the same teacher?!

If mine don’t come clean about not believing when they’re kids I might sit them down as adults when they tell me they’re pregnant etc and tell them earnestly that’s there’s something they need to know about Christmas

DS10 believes - it he does't he is definitely going with the flow !

@5thnonblonde no, not the same teacher. I think it’s our family - we’re scientists, and the way we and our kids think are driven by that. We didn’t deliberately turn them into mini-scientists: it was accidental as a result of our parenting. But it meant that the kids were wired to distinguish between fiction and reality quite early, to look for evidence and to question things. So they all realised for themselves. Other kids in their class were still believing by Y6. I can’t get my head around that: I simply don’t understand how a child could still believe at that age. Except that I recognise that not everyone thinks the way we do, so that’s how.

My favourite ever story about Father Christmas was when me and my best friend were about 15, and I was at her house. Her little brother was 10, and my best friend said something to him about FC, and then had to leave the room.

Her little brother turned to me and said “don’t worry, I know Father Christmas isn’t real, but Lucy (my friend) doesn’t know yet so I pretend for her.”

It was the funniest thing that’s ever happened to me. He was so serious about it!!

Mine was dubious at 5 and definitely didn't believe it at 6. But fortunately was happy to be kind to her more gullible friends and not insist on spilling the beans. (she took a firmer line on god vs evolution for who/what made animals!)

My 7 year old doesn't believe anymore.

He's a very logical thinker, and is really into science and absorbing as much as he can about a topic.

He was learning about light speed and asked how Santa's sleigh went faster than light speed... I definitely didn't have a convincing answer! I think beyond 7 most kids really start to question it, going off my family and friend's kids.

My eldest DD was about 9, I think. She told me that she’d come across my written list of stocking presents (Father Christmas brings just the stockings in our household) - whoops! She didn’t seem to mind at all though, and has carried on pretending for the younger 2. They are now 8 and 10. Pretty sure the 10 year old also knows but she’s not discussed it with me, not sure about DS8. He’s a realist and likes facts, so wouldn’t be surprised if he’s never really believed. They all love getting their stockings though, whether or not they believe.

@5thnonblonde

I think I thought that I wouldn’t get presents from the Santa I knew wasn’t real!

In a way the actual truth that millions of adults voluntarily engage in the same conspiracy is slightly more amazing

That made me laugh!

I’m pretty sure my 10 year old knows, but keeps pretending it’s all real that or just desperately wants presents

And my 8 year old is asking questions 🤷‍♀️ and was very dejected when the Lego they wanted was out of stock on the smyths toy store online lucky that mummy has already worked it out

Mine never did. From when he could string a sentence together he really wasn't having any of it

My niece is 11. For the last couple of years I've excitedly mentioned Santa but although she hasn't corrected me she appears nonchalant. Perhaps she hasn't said anything to me because she thinks I still believe. I'm 53 😂

I've been honest with mine from the beginning, and told them Santa doesn't really exist, but it's fun to pretend he does, so we all pretend together.

We still do things like putting a mince pie and carrot out in Christmas Eve and then discovering them eaten in the morning. We pretend it was Santa, then my 5 year old whispers conspiratorially "it was you really" and whisper back "yes, but let's pretend".

It's still magical, but without the stress of needing them to believe.

I make sure to stress that's it's extra import to pretend with other kids, cos some of them really believe it's true and we don't want to make them sad. So far it's not been an issue, cos my kids love the pretending and magic of it.