How do you leave stress at the front door?

[eltsihT]

I am about to start a new teaching role. I know it’s going to be stressful. I know the young people are going to push my patience to the limits.

I have been working 1 day a week in similar role, and on one occasion I came home after an incident and my DH asked if I wanted a glass of wine. I politely declined and took myself out for a walk. I felt much better.

Really interested in what you do to leave stress at the door.

With teaching I think it depends how far you are in your career. If you've just started out then you are going to need to spend more times on the evenings doing prep etc because you have less resources and ideas under your belt. So some of that is unavoidable that you do need to bring some things home. Depending on the time of year as well there are always reports and data that needs sorting out and you just have to do that in your own time. So that's not overly helpful!

I've been teaching for a very long time though, always in my same specialist area so on the whole, I don't bring work home. I'm very strict about that, when I leave it's family time and my time. I make sure when I go into my Lunch break and my PPA time, or other non pupil times, that I have a list of things I need to complete in those times and if I haven't done it, I will not take it home.

Sometimes it's easier said than done, and of course I do bring work home, probably more than I'd like, but this year especially, I have been very strict with myself that not all of my personal life is going to be taken over by work.

Thanks for the reply. I have been teaching for 15 years, I am making the move from mainstream secondary teaching to ASN full time.

I have been in an ASN setting 1 day a week and am enjoying the challenge of something new. I had an incident where a pupil deregulated, and I came home very wound up, I am looking for strategies to de stress before coming home, so I don’t end up in a chocolate eating, wine spiral, where I end up shouting at my own family. (Been there before when in a previous school)

@eltsihT

Thanks for the reply. I have been teaching for 15 years, I am making the move from mainstream secondary teaching to ASN full time.

I have been in an ASN setting 1 day a week and am enjoying the challenge of something new. I had an incident where a pupil deregulated, and I came home very wound up, I am looking for strategies to de stress before coming home, so I don’t end up in a chocolate eating, wine spiral, where I end up shouting at my own family. (Been there before when in a previous school)

I've only ever worked in SEN so I do understand what you mean. But, you get used to it, and you don't take it so strongly yourself. I remember when I started out about 17 years ago and it did used to really get to me, every minor physical intervention and I was like you said - really wound up and stressed. It's a big thing to deal with - helping people who are often unable to regulate themselves and then it all gets taken out on you.

I don't know what to suggest really other than just taking the time to sit with what has happened on a day, and think why its getting to you - did a child get particularly stressed and you couldn't help them calm down effectively (it happens), has there been a parent who has come to you upset, have you had to physically restrain someone (always horrendous), have you or a colleague been hurt, has a child been hurt... Etc etc

These things are part of the job / vocation that we do and I think if you take the time to reflect upon what happened before leaving for the day it's helpful - debrief with colleagues who were there or even those who weren't who could lend an ear .

Sometimes I take some of the really horrible things I've had to do home, and they do of course play on my mind, but over the years working in this environment, I think you just get used to it, that's all I can say really. It's a lot different to mainstream, and you will adjust.