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Original poster

I cried on the phone to a customer

102 replies

TheChild · 22/11/2021 19:57

I have had the shittest of shit days today, need to let it out because I can't stop crying.

I work in a Call Centre, worked at the same place for nearly 6 years now. 5 minutes before the end of my shift and 5 minutes before we actually close I get a call from a customer who I could tell striaght away was not happy.

It was nothing I had personally done, he had problems with our (admittedly outdated) systems and the way we have to do things. Nothing I said or did was good enough, the options I gave going forward weren't options, I had to repeat myself multiple times when he kept asking the same question, saying that I did not have the answer because it involved a 3rd party who's systems we don't have access to. I never ever lose it on the phone, show any annoyance or emotion but this man just pushed me to the edge. I asked if he's like to speak to a manager, ignored and told again how useless I was. Asked what I could do to put the situation right, was told I could tell him the answer to the question that I already said I could not answer, offered to raise a complaint so we could fully investigate. Nope.

What made it worse was that I was working from home, no colleague next to me to listen in and take over the call and my voice broke and I started crying, whilst at the same time apologising for being unprofessional. Ended up staying on an hour and 30 minutes extra doing everything I needed to do. A colleague will need to listen to the call as I logged a complaint, so they will have to hear my pathetic snivelling.

I'm so cross with myself that I let someone get to me that badly, and that I had a panic attack afterwards whilst trying to sort it all out. I'm back in tomorrow and I just feel sick, I'm so fed up. I don't want to go to work tomorrow and deal with more people being arseholes over something that is not my fault.

I will add a disclaimer to say that the majority of the people I speak to are lovely, but it's the rare arseholes that can just ruin my day. My confidence is completely knocked

Please someone tell me SOMETHING happy?!

OP posts:

Gilmoregale · 22/11/2021 21:08

Oh, and on a very practical note, if your company hasn't sent you on conflict resolution courses, or even if they have, can they recommend a refresher? At a couple of places I worked we were very lucky to have an ex-police officer and someone who'd worked in Northern Ireland training us, and the techniques they suggested were brilliant in most cases.

Legoninjago1 · 22/11/2021 21:09

Hugs OP. Some people are bona fide twats.

MrsMoastyToasty · 22/11/2021 21:10

As above..
And if all else fails tell them that you're going to have to end the call because the fire alarm is going off.
(FWIW I have cried in a face to face situation with a customer. It was ugly crying too. Luckily one of my colleagues intervened. )

BrilliantBetty · 22/11/2021 21:11

Oh love.
I speak to difficult and demanding people at work, in complicated situations and honestly it is hard work, it really is! the fact that you still care enough to be upset is really showing of what a kind and dedicated individual you are. It is not pathetic. It is natural. So many people in this sort of role become desensitised completely and that's not good.

You are caring and passionate.
Find a new job where your skills and attributes can really shine.

Peoniesandpeaches · 22/11/2021 21:18

@RosiePosieDozy

I wouldn't have continued with the call. I've worked in various call centres and if someone became rude or I had given all of the advice I could give, I would terminate the call. I would usually warn them first that I would terminate the call if they continued. You do not go to work to be spoken to like dirt.

I've been there. You need to forget about it, move on and continue being great at your job.

Yup exactly and a managers job is to have your back when you are being abused so there should be a system where you can tag them on teams and they can take over the call. In future even if they don’t want a manager if you feel it needs escalation do it. Nothing worse than an arsehole to finish up the day with

A8mint · 22/11/2021 21:18

There are so many threads on MN where the poster cries and it annoys me. How are we women supposed to be taken seriously at work when some women can't manage their emotions and cry . It is so unprofessional and does nothing to help the cause of equality at work

Incywinceyspider · 22/11/2021 21:21

I'm a call centre manager. I'm sorry you've had one of "those calls". They can really wreck your day.

I tell my team to follow a 3 strikes and you're out policy.

Strike 1: "Please don't speak to me like that. I'm doing my best to help."

Strike 2: "I've asked you not to speak to me in that manner. If you continue I'm afraid I will be ending the call".

Strike 3: "I've already asked you not to speak to me like that. I'm terminating the call now". And hang up.

Speak to your manager tomorrow and let them know what happened. Do you have a way of getting the time back? In my company you would be allowed an early finish tomorrow.

Incywinceyspider · 22/11/2021 21:22

@A8mint oh shut up

amicissimma · 22/11/2021 21:24

I love the idea of connecting two angry customers with each other!

Then you could go and have a cup of tea while they rant at each other.

I wonder how it's done ...

OldTinHat · 22/11/2021 21:24

If it makes you feel any better, I ruined several people's day today. I was totally zoned out and walked straight into the road in front of a double decker. That poor driver and passengers! He managed to stop about 2m from me, I froze . You know when they say 'hey don't worry, you could be hit by a bus tomorrow!', at least you weren't hit by a bus! 😬 I burst into tears.

Your work environment obviously isn't right. You're under pressure and anyone would break. Your employers need to improve how you and colleagues work. Can you speak with a line manager and get some support? The public can be shit and being at the end of the phone and not face to face makes it easier to be nasty. I hope you can access support there. A friend I knew who worked in a call centre could only get through by going to the pub every lunchtime and working his shift smashed.

Rubberduckluckmuck · 22/11/2021 21:25

I'm so sorry OP.

I work in health care. An angry lady once reduced one of my colleagues to tears whilst shouting at her about something she wasn't happy about. My colleague was having an awful day and had tried to help but nothing was helping the situation. I had to take over the call and advise I would be ending the call due to the abuse, and dud just that.

Sometimes people forget there's a human being on the other end of the line and its absolutely unacceptable.

Sn0tnose · 22/11/2021 21:25

@A8mint

I’ve worked in call centres before. As A8mint has just demonstrated, some people have difficulties when it comes to dealing with others. I don’t know if it’s because they were never taught to play nicely as children, or because they’re full of frustration and have no way to get it out other than picking on the person who they know isn’t allowed to tell them to fuck off, or because they are just massive cunts. But whichever it is, the problem is theirs, not yours.

Have your bath, spend some time laughing with your DC and your DH and try to relax. Tomorrow is another day and in a couple of months time, this customer will have blended into ancient history and you won’t even remember him.

FeelingKrabi · 22/11/2021 21:30

@A8mint

I've got male colleagues who have cried at work. Just to clarify, is that OK by you? It's just women who aren't allowed to?

SpookyScarySkeletons · 22/11/2021 21:30

@A8mint

ODFOD

JustFrigginNameChange · 22/11/2021 21:30

My advice (might not be the best advice but it works for me) is to just take the headset off for a bit and let them rant. When I no longer hear their little tinny voice shouting I put my headset back on and try again to solve their problem. They often want to go at it for a second round so off the headset comes again until they run out of steam

Fredstheteds · 22/11/2021 21:34

Poor you- we have the worst gas supplier ever and I always want to rant and rage but don’t because the poor lady or gent on the other end of the phone is human.

As for the puppy news- brilliant that’s a life line for them both

Iamkmackered1979 · 22/11/2021 21:36

My boyfriend works in a call centre for a bank. And he’s utterly demoralised and sick of it. Being shouted at for 10 hours a day is not nice. No bloody wonder you cried he feels like it most days too!.

It’s a horrible job, not sure how anyone does it! I’m a nurse and also get some abuse it’s not nice but it helps to know how to deal with it, I’m also not alone and have backup so it’s different but still difficult.

I hope tomorrow is a better day. Glad you have managers who listen & are helpful.
Boyfriend manager was ill so left and then moved teams now this one is acting up so he has no one to ask for help or even a day off, I had a medical procedure he had to be there to pick me up and trying to get the day off as all the other managers told him to ask someone else he was so stressed about it as I’ve been waiting a while for appointment so didn’t want to cancel.

shamalidacdak · 22/11/2021 21:37

How shit OP. It's not a nice feeling is it? Thankfully where I work we're allowed to hang up on abusive clients. I do it with great relish.

Newnameforabit · 22/11/2021 21:37

@SnOtnose 'as A8mint has just demonstrated.'
Brilliant
Enjoy your tea/wine and bath OP and let your managers deal with them tomorrow

Porfre · 22/11/2021 21:39

I meet people like this regularly.

Some people will not be happy.

It doesnt matter what you do.

In the end you realise the problem isnt with you but the customer. They really are just a miserable person with probably a crap life.

At least you only had to speak to them for a short while and now they are gone

That person actually has to live with themself and their life every day. Imagine being that stressed out at all times?
imagine the kind of life they lead, unlikely they've got many friends or even if they did it probably wouldn't bring them any joy.

You only had to spend an hour with them. Count yourself lucky.
They actually live their life like that forevermore.

bloodywhitecat · 22/11/2021 21:41

I have made lots of calls today and cried on all of them, I am sorry you have had a shit day too flowers

Original poster

TheChild · 22/11/2021 21:42

@Incywinceyspider

I'm a call centre manager. I'm sorry you've had one of "those calls". They can really wreck your day.

I tell my team to follow a 3 strikes and you're out policy.

Strike 1: "Please don't speak to me like that. I'm doing my best to help."

Strike 2: "I've asked you not to speak to me in that manner. If you continue I'm afraid I will be ending the call".

Strike 3: "I've already asked you not to speak to me like that. I'm terminating the call now". And hang up.

Speak to your manager tomorrow and let them know what happened. Do you have a way of getting the time back? In my company you would be allowed an early finish tomorrow.

We have a similar type of policy, although it's more if the customer is swearing at you and becoming absuive. This gentleman wasn't swearing, but whatever I suggested he just interupted me. Nothing was good enough and I simply couldn't give him the information he wanted. I'll be able to bank some of the time, unfortunately when the call ended I logged off straight away and ended up staying 40 minutes past that sending emails, logging notes which I won't be able to claim back as I wasn't officially logged in.

I really would love an admin job where I don't have to deal with members of the public and can just get on with my work without having to speak to other people 😁 unfortunately my company are really nice, I have great hours and flexibility for childcare and I have no experience in admin that might help me land a new job.

I really appreciate all the responses, they have cheered me up a lot.

OP posts:

NotMyCat · 22/11/2021 21:44

Been there, done that. I told a customer it was a human error once, apologised, tried to fix it and she said it wasn't acceptable and I should lose my job for it
Ended up crying on the call and she was still shouting at me

ThorsLeftNut · 22/11/2021 21:45

@A8mint

We’ve just found your caller OP.

Get it all off your chest to this idiot now 😂

Original poster

TheChild · 22/11/2021 21:46

😂 Luckily this thread proves that the majority of mumsnetters are brilliant!

OP posts:

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