Xmas gifts for adult siblings & partners?

[InTheWilderness82]

Do you buy Xmas presents for your adult siblings? DH has 7 siblings aged 15-28! They've started getting partnered up now too! His mum has always had everyone over to hers every Xmas day but as we now have our own baby we are thinking of having Xmas day to ourselves at home this year then seeing her on Boxing Day. This has hurt her feelings but I think it's ok?

Anyway we also end up spending a fortune on gifts - at least £30-40 per person and often more for the younger ones and DH's mum. DH's mum makes a really big deal of the present opening on the day with everyone doing in in turns etc. She films it abs takes a photo of each person with their gifts to add to a special album. It ends up taking about 4 hours.

We can't afford it but don't want to be mean. But we are not going to be there for the whole present spectacle thing anyway.

DH is wondering when / if / how this ever ends. I said I haven't got a clue as my family don't do this.

Could you suggest a secret Santa? What we do is one for adults and one for all children. Everyone gets one decent present and only the people with children have to buy for children. I also buy for MIL and FIL (we owe them as they do a lot for us) but I couldn't buy for all about 40)

Sorry as in a separate secret Santa for children so they only get one big present also (€30 for children & €50 for adults)

I would skim. The adults down to maybe a bottle of whatever each and maybe spend a bit more on the teenager at 15 .you won't be there Christmas day for the 4 hour present opening so I don't think it matters if you are keeping up with them.

Good grief no we don’t, I am one of six siblings. In our family it was always gifts till you were 18.

I agree about secret Santa. We've done it before and it worked really well. We did it on a website that swapped everyone's names and you could also make a wish list. I'm sure they'll be an app too.

Secret Santa is a good idea - thank you!

Another here where we do secret santa every year with my siblings and our partners are there are loads of us! We use elfster where you can also put some suggestions of what you would like and set a spend amount xx

I think the younger ones should have presents but certainly once the others are working then I wouldn't be buying presents.

I do but not their partners. That said none of them have ever been in a relationship longer than a couple of years, if they were in a proper LTR I might

Boogspace is the secret Santa webpage it works really well.

Yes, in my family we all buy one present for one adult on Xmas day. It's not secret though. We just pick names out beforehand and say, X you're buying for Y etc. The budget is 30-40 quid and you can either give your buyer a few ideas as to what you would like or opt for a surprise. This way everyone has one present to open on the day but it doesn't get totally ridiculous. We do get for all the kids though although these days it's usually just sweets and money.

I only have one sibling and I buy a bottle of spirits for her and one for my brother in law. I only spend max £20 per person though, with exception of my husband and mum.

My friend is from a large family and they do a secret Santa which works well. They don't have a huge budget for the gift and instead, they always have a siblings Christmas do at some point in December.