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Can't sleep.So sad about brexit and lost opportunities for kids

18 replies

QueenZoopla · 17/11/2021 02:58

We are in UK, DD and boyfriend both graduated last year, both now working in jobs they don't enjoy. DD is fluent in 3 European languages and has EU passport. Boyfriend is UK citizen. Brexit has created this stark divide between them - they would love to live somewhere in Europe, where she could use her languages and they could both travel and experience different jobs. While she could still do that, he, of course, has lost his FOM and it's no longer an option for him. She doesn't want to leave him.
It's just all so sad and I'm so angry at bloody brexit. It was so bloody pointless and just ruined people's lives and dreams , for absolutely nothing.

OP posts:
Etinoxaurus · 17/11/2021 03:20

Very similar situation here with graduating dcs except they’ve already had to return from dream opportunity as visa ran out. It is doable though- if they want to go oversees the bf ‘just’ needs to get organised as if he’s going to the states or Australia.
Please don’t take on the pain yourself. Can they not go anyway and apply once there or come back?

QueenZoopla · 17/11/2021 03:29

Etinoxaurus thanks for your kind words. Where were your DCs? Did they have jobs that they had to leave - don't you have to get a job first then apply for a visa?

OP posts:
PickUpAPepper · 17/11/2021 07:14

It's just all so sad and I'm so angry at bloody brexit. It was so bloody pointless and just ruined people's lives and dreams , for absolutely nothing.

Yup. That’s about the size of it. It is shit.

PAFMO · 17/11/2021 07:15

Yep.
Nothing else to add.

Camomila · 17/11/2021 07:25

Yup it's rubbish. Could he get a student Visa and do a Masters somewhere? (money depended of course)

Camomila · 17/11/2021 07:31

Totally first world problem but its scuppered my future "ask one of my many younger cousins in Italy if she wanted to be my au pair" plans. Would have been so handy school/nursery drop off wise!

spotcheck · 17/11/2021 07:32

Well, he can get a visa?

Brexit sucks for lots of reasons, but your child's life isn't 'ruined' because her boyfriend doesn't want to look into getting a visa.

Fabian15 · 17/11/2021 07:35

I agree. My son travelled all round Europe and has settled in CZ. He now has settled status. However his girlfriend is from a non-EU country, and has been able to stay ( though it's been complicated and more expensive)
It's still do-able I think, but not as easy as it was ( I'm a remain voter and as furious about it as you are, just wanted to offer some hope)

Fabian15 · 17/11/2021 07:39

@QueenZoopla

Etinoxaurus thanks for your kind words. Where were your DCs? Did they have jobs that they had to leave - don't you have to get a job first then apply for a visa?
Yes I think that's the difficulty now. My son just turned up, got a job in hospitality, rented a room and was able to get on with it. His g/f has a study visa now, but we're not sure how long she'll be able to stay. They may well end up getting married and going back to live in her country.
Etinoxaurus · 17/11/2021 07:43

DD and BF left for a volunteering post in September. The charity paid their rent and a stipend, enough to live on but once the 90 days were looming they had to apply for and risk losing €€€ for a visa which they weren’t prepared to risk. It sucks.

Whyamistilltired · 17/11/2021 07:43

It's turned out so well hasn't it Sad

Trixiefirecracker · 17/11/2021 07:46

It’s a shit show. I can’t believe people are still thinking it was a good idea.

tara66 · 17/11/2021 08:11

Absolutely agree - the Schengen Visa affects people with holiday homes in EU a great deal.

Aposterhasnoname · 17/11/2021 08:12

Why can’t he get a visa?

Cma1988 · 17/11/2021 08:16

Get a visa. That’s what people from other countries have been doing for years. If he wanted to go to Australia or Asia he would need a visa

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 17/11/2021 08:19

I find it baffling that my DD isn't allowed to live in the Country she was born in without applying for a visa... but she could when she was born there. She only lived there a quarter of her life, and another 20% in a different EU country, so has lived in the UK the majority of her life now (none of that being linear, she's had seven homes now at 10 years old) but I sort of expected she could do similar with her life, as could her younger sister. Just move to another country to get some experience.

Greenmarmalade · 17/11/2021 08:20

Agree with pp-still very much an option, just harder to organise. But if you have to learn a language and find a job anyway, it’s never an easy option to work abroad.

LaMagdalena · 17/11/2021 08:26

@Aroundtheworldin80moves

I find it baffling that my DD isn't allowed to live in the Country she was born in without applying for a visa... but she could when she was born there. She only lived there a quarter of her life, and another 20% in a different EU country, so has lived in the UK the majority of her life now (none of that being linear, she's had seven homes now at 10 years old) but I sort of expected she could do similar with her life, as could her younger sister. Just move to another country to get some experience.
My DD was also born in the EU but doesn't have the right to live there (well, unless she goes to live with her father, but that isn't going to happen). My dream is to move back there for a year at least so she would be eligible for a passport, but it seems like an impossible task. 'Get a visa then' is not good advice.
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