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Please help I'm at breaking point with my child

5 replies

Dustydolly · 16/11/2021 13:01

Hi can anyone please help as I'm at breaking point here.

I have a 6 year old that is currently under camhs on the autism pathway. I can't get him to leave the home, he's not currently attending school because of this. He refuses to get dressed, won't wear any pjs either he wants to he naked all the time. He last wore clothes on Thursday when after a 3 hour battle he went into school for 20 minutes. He gets violent, throws things, will absolutely not negotiate, we've tried visuals, sticker charts, he needs to be in absolute control at all times. He won't even go to a playpark or something a child his age would like.

I just don't know what to do anymore, I have the education welfare officer on my case, she says I'm pandering to him and not trying hard enough, she's threatening legal action. We've also go a social worker that is now getting more concerned about his school attendance and behaviour.

We live in a flat so I have to get him down 5 flights of concrete stairs before getting to a carpark which is by a busy road, we've both received injures when I've tried carrying him and he's lashing out. I can't work, can't just pop to the shop, basically can't do anything because he refuses to get dressed and go out. I'm at my wits end. Thanks

OP posts:
MistyFrequencies · 16/11/2021 13:09

That sounds so hard. Have you seen the PDA PANDA? Might be worth a google. Is strategies for parents with children with a Pathological Demand Avoidance profile.
Other than that, sounds like a Psychologist is the way forward if you can access or go privately?

Dustydolly · 16/11/2021 13:14

I've researched PDA and definitely sounds like my son. He gets offered choices and I don't know how I can be any more flexible or patient with him but he will still not get dressed or go out.
I've paid privately for him to start play therapy sessions next month but they are out of the home so don't even know how I'm going to get him there.

OP posts:
MatJas · 16/11/2021 13:19

Marking place as I’m at work but I’ll reply once I’m home x

jputthekettleon · 17/11/2021 12:29

I’m sorry I don’t have any advice but I really feel for you both and I’m so sorry you’re in this situation. I’m sorry the welfare officer isn’t being more supportive. What do they expect you to do if he won’t get dressed you can’t force a child physically or mentally to do that.

Bargoed · 17/11/2021 13:29

Tell the ewo that you will make your child avalible for collection so they can come and take him to school - make it clear that if he thinks it's so easy he can bloody well try it

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