Advice

[TINK21007]

Met lovely guy in last few months, but daughter very jealous says he s not allowed in house, ( id no intention of letting them meet him ) she calls me a slag , punches me ,pulls my hair and verbally abuses me most days im heartbroken to be honest, ive been on my own over 2 years now but wondering if I'm being selfish by wanting a bit of a life now kids older ,,,right now I feel I should put her first if unhappy she's 17 sons 12 he seems ok mostly, appreciate some advice as im feeling guilty about everything and don't want to mess nice guy around

Your daughter needs to get a grip and behave herself. ! How dare she assault you like this. She is literally committing a criminal offence.

Yes of course you are allowed a live life ! If I were you I would keep this delightful young lady a long way from your boyfriend for now .

Is your dd father in the scene ? Will he help you discuss her completely unacceptable behaviour? and see what reason she gives for this unpleasantness .

Someone will be along with some better advice OP, but the ways she treats you is wrong and needs addressing. The physical violence alone is very worrying. Do you feel unsafe? As for the dating, of course you should be allowed to. My DF started dating my Stepmum within months of my DM dying. I was a similar age to your DD. I didn't like it but that was partly because it was happening too quickly. That's not the case in your situation.

Who is she to tell you who you are allowed to have in YOUR house? But more importantly than that why are you allowing her to abuse you in your own home? I would honestly kick her out for the way she treats you, if only for the terrible example she is setting your younger child!

Tell her you will be phoning the police the next time she ever lays a hand on you, and do it!

There is a whole lot more going on with her than you having a boyfriend. She absolutely should not be assaulting you but people with such anger like that are usually hurting. Is there more going on with her that you know of?

I bet she doesn't behave like this with other people, though.

You (hopefully) wouldn’t put up with domestic violence from a partner, so don’t put up with it from your daughter.

www.familylives.org.uk/advice/teenagers/behaviour/teen-violence-at-home/

If you allow her to continue to be violent then it is likely to escalate as she will think she can get away with more each time.

You having a boyfriend isn't the problem. Your violent out of control daughter is. You need to contact a domestic violence agency for support and consider whether you should ask your daughter to find alternative accommodation. As difficult as it it you should report her physical assaults to the Police. She is 17 not 7 so she is fully responsible for her behaviour.

I wholeheartedly agree with the advice of contacting a domestic violence agency.

She is physically and emotionally abusing you.

I also agree that you should contact the police.