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A care package...

4 replies

brightgreenapple · 14/11/2021 20:05

My good friend has a 12 week old baby very very poorly, (inpatient in hospital for 5 weeks) she isn't up to phone calls/talking, and I wanted to get her a small gift for her/her family or a few bits to let them know I am thinking of them at this difficult time.

I send a gentle text message once a week to let her know I am here, for anything which she reads and sends a simple emoji back.

My heart is breaking for them and her other child and I know there isn't anything I can do but I wanted to ask, if anyone has done this before and what they'd include?

Thank you in advance

OP posts:
makelovenotpetrol · 14/11/2021 21:07

When my child died and i was in the hospital with other children I was not in a state to be able to deal with someone sending me gifts. I just didn't have any emotions left to deal with anyone being nice to me. If I'm honest I left all gifts unopened until many many months later. I think what you're doing is enough. If she is replying only with emojis, as kind as your thought is, it feels to me that gifts may be too overwhelming.

brightgreenapple · 14/11/2021 23:53

Thank you @makelovenotpetrol I will take on board your advice. I am very conscious about not being OTT but wanted to make a tiny gesture. I will wait.

OP posts:
WhatonEarth1 · 15/11/2021 05:57

When I was in a similar situation, it was the king gestures from others that got us through. People around us were incredibly thoughtful and the things that I appreciated the most included ready meals, things to keep the oldest two dc occupied and feel loved, taking the oldest two on outings, a candle of hope and a necklace that said hope on it.

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makelovenotpetrol · 15/11/2021 06:22

It's difficult , because PP has said that they did appreciate things. Obviously I don't know your friend. However another issue I had with gifts was, even though I didn't open them I then felt pressured that I had to message people and thank them - and I didn't want to message anyone at all at that point. I remember feeling scared that If I messaged saying anything someone would then reply to that and it was just too much. I think this is where I was sort of coming from if your friend is only replying with emojis, it feels that maybe she could be in a similar mindset.

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