DD(11) anxiety on downward spiral since seeing phycologist. Normal pattern or is something wrong?

[cheeseismydownfall]

DD(11) has been struggling with health anxiety and emetophobia for at least a year. We didn't join the dots until the summer, at which point we saw the GP who agreed she needed support and gave us a private referral to a very well regarded and experienced clinical psychologist who specialises in working with children and young people (he said realistically she would not get help from CAHMS).

We had to wait a few months to be seen, but DD started sessions with her in September and has five sessions so far. The first two sessions were for assessment and the last three sessions she has started to work with DD using age-appropriate CBT, mindfulness etc techniques. She seems capable and kind and DD trusts her.

But. Following her last session a couple of weeks ago, DD experienced her worst anxiety episode to date and was unable to apply any of the techniques they had started to work on. Since then she's been up and down but overall worse than before, and then today she experienced what I think was a full-blown panic attack for the first time. She is really struggling.

I'm feeling lost and helpless. I know it is early days and I wasn't expecting a miracle but I'm now worried that the treatment has somehow pathologised her feelings and made it all much worse.

I will of course be speaking to the psychologist - she had a session this week - but I was wondering if anyone had any experiences they could share?

PS she also had covid three/four weeks ago and felt pretty rubbish with it, which combined with the isolation from her friends and routine obviously hasn't helped at all.

Hopeful bump

If the psych is doing CMT and mindfulness, it sounds unlikely that this would have triggered a major anxiety attack.

It sounds like the trigger may have been Covid and the isolation, with - as is very normal - reactions happening after the event. Great that you’re going to speak with the psych since she will really need the full picture.

In the meantime, try to keep everything calm and level at home and - however hard it is for you - try to stay steady and in control for Dd. That is the advice they gave me, anyway, and it did seem to help DS.

@FutureHope

If the psych is doing CMT and mindfulness, it sounds unlikely that this would have triggered a major anxiety attack.

It sounds like the trigger may have been Covid and the isolation, with - as is very normal - reactions happening after the event. Great that you’re going to speak with the psych since she will really need the full picture.

In the meantime, try to keep everything calm and level at home and - however hard it is for you - try to stay steady and in control for Dd. That is the advice they gave me, anyway, and it did seem to help DS.

What she said! Why did you assume it was the therapy?

Often with therapy things get 'worse' before they get 'better' as it stirs stuff up that's not been talked about so it can be 'destabilising'-it should be short term but I think mentioning it to the psychologist, or encouraging your 11 year old to mention it, would be helpful just so they're aware xxx

Thank you both for taking the time to reply.

It was the timing really that made me wonder about the link - as I said, she seems overall seems to be getting worse, not better, and the major anxiety event (which lasted over a day) started literally within minutes of getting home from her last session. My worry is that the sessions are making her even more focused on her anxiety.

But yes, covid could absolutely be the trigger. Due to half term and back-to-back isolations within the family she was stuck at home for three weeks. She really missed her friends and unfortunately for the last week her siblings were back at school while DH and I were WFH so she spent a lot of time alone.

We are trying to get her back into her normal routine and she is happy to be back at school, but is struggling to do the hobbies she enjoys and which I would normally say would be good for her mental health. I am trying to keep things nice and calm, but at home she has a tendancy to retreat into her head which I worry about.

newtolineofduty, thank you, that makes sense. I will definitely mention it.

I would echo the PP that things can get worse before they get better because part of the therapy will be finding and working on triggers which can stir things up. Definitely mention it to the therapist though. Good luck and hope she works through it all and comes out the other side soon. (My DD is a changed child after a hideous year of panic attacks and depressive episodes last year).

@panicmode1 thank you so much for your reply. I know DD has been doing a lot of work exploring triggers in her sessions so that fits. It's almost like she is on (even more) heightened alert.

I'm so glad that your DD is feeling so much better now. How old is your DD may I ask? What approaches do you think we're successful, and how did you support her outside of her sessions, if you are comfortable with sharing that? Thank you again for replying.

Hi Cheese, she is almost 17, and had been having a very difficult time with a friendship group which slowly turned increasingly toxic over time. She ended up having panic attacks going in to her form room...in a way lockdowns helped because she didn't have to physically be in school, but then she was very isolated and in her room a lot, which increased the depression.

She and I are close so I just kept talking to her, we went on dog walks together (when I could coax her out of her room), and signposted her to apps and websites (Anxiety UK, No Panic for example), and she did a lot of meditation and journalling and got herself a diffuser with various essential oils which she found helped.

I guess being a bit older helped, as she did a lot of self reflection but it wasn't an easy road, and at times I was terrified she wasn't going to pull out of it, but she's now in Lower 6th, miraculously did very well in her GCSE assessments, so got good grades, has made some gorgeous new friends and seems genuinely happy again.

Wishing your daughter well, and look after yourself too.

panicmode1, thank you so much for your reply. Your poor DD, what a horrible experience for her. That's marvelous that she is doing so well now.

I'll definitely take a look at those websites, thank you.

@Panicmode1 have you any advice when your child won't talk to you. Year 11 exam anxiety, mocks walked out of, now hiding in school corridors to avoid the teachers who want to talk and help. Won't talk to me or engage with resources I suggest. On a long waiting list for counselling. Outside of school able to talk to other adults and control their anxiety.