Don't want to drip feed so this is quite long, sorry!
I've agreed to babysit niece, 4 and bit months old, for an evening/night next week. I'm really the only available option and I do love my family, so I didn't want to say no, but I'm a bit stressed about parenting style.
Parents (sis and bro-in-law) have had the baby in her own room for over a month and have been sleep training since 2 months. Not timed controlled crying, and not quite cry it out, but closer to cry it out: quite a long time (not actually timed) before they'll go in. They watch the monitor (obsessively!) to make sure baby is ok, but don't go in to the room for quite a while.
They know that I don't agree with this, and have shared with them how I feel about cry it out (as have other siblings), but we've both always addressed the subject courteously and I have let them get on with it: they're the parents and they do love the baby and are trying their best.
This will be the first time I've been alone with the baby for an extended period of several hours. I do generally believe that the parents have the right to set rules and certainly when I've babysat other nieces and nephews I've kept to what the parents want re. food, bedtimes etc. and I expected them to do the same when they babysat my dc. But on this issue I really don't know what to do. Technically, niece is now old enough for sleep training, and so I guess it comes under parenting style rather than actually being dangerous. But I still would find it incredibly difficult to leave a crying baby alone.
I've told my sister how I feel and that I'm not sure I could stick to it, but she has brushed it away by saying that the baby now always sleeps from x to y time without waking, meaning that she won't wake and cry between bedtime and when they get back. I don't feel greatly reassured by this because it doesn't answer the 'what if' question. I know my brother-in-law would be really upset if I didn't stick to their methods (sister is possibly slightly more pragmatic about it, but not willing to discuss it) ... I don't know for sure, but I wouldn't be surprised if they have the baby monitor linked to their phones so they could see what's going on even when they're out.
WWYD?
I'm not trying to create a debate about the pros and cons of different sleep training methods/parenting styles, more the question of what do you do when you're asked to babysit and there's a clash of opinions.
[Have NC in case family are on here]