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I think I've just had a good idea, but I have absolutely no idea.

71 replies

Gingernaut · 07/11/2021 18:10

Levelling up.

It takes a village to raise a child

Education! Education! Education!

Yes.

However, I live in a deprived shit hole, with poverty and dysfunctional family set ups all across the area.

There are many children with chronic conditions whose family set up means they are missing essential hospital appointments.

Crucial scans and diagnostic tests have had to be rescheduled because the parent or guardian cannot believe the child is that ill (even if the condition is hereditary, they've seen it kill and/or they have complications from it themselves), they went on holiday at the last minute, knowing full well that the appointment was pending and thought they could rebook after the appointment had passed, a sibling is playing up or they can't afford the bus fare.

Children are missing out on consultant, dentist or eye appointments because mum is phobic and can't gather herself to bring the child and there is no one else she can rely on.

There are children who aren't into their teens, already suffering life limiting effects of health conditions and whose prospects of employment are lowered as a result.

Children missing out on scholarships or extracurricular classes because the family can't afford the uniforms, kit, instruments, books or can't get their act together to get them to classes.

Children not progressing because the family are dependent on short term lets, B&B, private landlords and are moving on a biannual or more basis.

Children who have a talent but who can't practice, because there's no space, it's too noisy or time consuming for someone to get them to practice.

What if there was a 'collective' of volunteers?

DBS checked volunteers, who could spare a couple of hours a day/week/weekend, who could help out.

Some with resources, some with cars and free time, some with experience of teaching, mentoring, coaching and some with maybe £5 a month to spare.

What if there was an organisation which could coordinate these volunteers?

Send an email to the volunteers each month asking when they were free and what resources they could make available.

People could make referrals to this organisation.

Teachers, social workers, parents, grandparents and a child's needs assessed as a whole.

So a child who needed to practice an instrument, could be paired up with someone in a detached house or who had a piano that they could practice on for an hour a day.

A child who needed space, peace and quiet to study could be paired up with someone who had a dining table and wifi out of library hours

A child who needed someone to pick them up and take them to appointments could be paired up with someone with the right car seat who could take them - I can see that would require patient confidentiality - so social worker? Nurse? The child and a trusted relative?

Applications could be made to the organisation for funds.

For educational, psychiatric and medical assessments, instruments, kit, supplement a scholarship, books, uniform etc.

Anything and everything required to intervene as early as possible and give any child as much help as possible.

The Tories brought in Student Loans

Labour brought in tuition fees

Both of these hit students from the poorest backgrounds disproportionately.

Clearly, there's no government or legislation that can be relied upon to help the least academically able, the disadvantaged and the victims of dysfunctional and abusive parenting.

A collective fund, a central hub of second hand uniforms, with volunteers to mend, clean and iron them, an organising committee, a fundraising committee and a squadron of volunteers across the area, committed to helping the next generation level up and better than the last.

Is this being done already?

Am I talking out of my arse?

Is this a good idea?

OP posts:
KhaleesiOfChaos · 07/11/2021 20:13

I love this idea and believe it could work.

I'd volunteer, although would also like to earn credits for times when I need some help as a single mum!

Gingernaut · 07/11/2021 20:29

There was a day last month where there were people trying to get locals interested in a Time Bank and this would be perfect for it.

Running errands for overwhelmed parents, mending and washing second hand uniforms and so on.

There's no one locally, with the expertise needed to get something like this going and while I am well intentioned, I've seen similar good ideas fizzle out due to lack of organisation, lack of follow-up and apathy.

The last thing I want to do is lead when I have no idea where I'm going and letting people down because I'm overwhelmed.

OP posts:
Newwallpaint · 07/11/2021 20:36

You're relying on lots and lots of people giving away their time for free. If you're involved with charities you know that loads of people already do this, and services are still struggling.

Cute idea, but it would take a lot of initial investment (of time and money) to make it work.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Gingernaut · 07/11/2021 20:47

I was just wondering if someone else had thought of it, but yes.

Volunteers. Giving up time and stuff for free. Not a popular idea, I know.

OP posts:
Newwallpaint · 07/11/2021 20:50

@Gingernaut the point I was making is that a lot of people in this country already do give away their time for free. Lots of charities have just as many volunteers as actual employees.

Luredbyapomegranate · 07/11/2021 21:00

It sounds like a good idea to me. I was really shocked when working on a children's burns unit many years ago, being told that many children would have unnecessary scaring because some families couldn't/wouldn't manage home dressings, or bring them to follow ups.

Don't talk yourself out of it, or let anyone else do that. Every single good idea anyone ever had could have been killed that way.

Perhaps Notwavingbutdrowning would have a PM conversation with you, and you could check out the similar charity suggested by another PP.

And then find out about and meet some local charities that work with families, church groups etc, and take it from there. You could find someone to umbrella you. Not everything you are imagining may be possible, but I'd bet some of it it is. And it would make a real difference.

Luredbyapomegranate · 07/11/2021 21:01

... once you get to the volunteers stage, think about where you find early retirees / retired teachers and other caring / upstanding! professionals.

DroopyClematis · 07/11/2021 21:02

SEN pisses me off.

On the one hand , you have parents tearing their hair out to get help and support for their child but on the other hand , you have parents in total denial that their child needs a referral /support.

Wish the government/local authorities would wade in.

Gingernaut · 07/11/2021 23:03

@Luredbyapomegranate, @DroopyClematis, I agree.

I work in a hospital and have seen and read the notes of children with asthma, whose parents effectively neglect them.

Parents who smoke, who won't use the preventer inhaler regularly, forget to bring the reliever inhaler out with them, won't get 'flu jabbed, won't have their child 'flu jabbed and who end up in A&E on a regular basis.

Wheezing, chest infections, bronchitis - all the while assuming that all this is how the disease works and they can do nothing about it. The fatalism makes me want to shake some of them.

OP posts:
Avarua · 07/11/2021 23:19

Best thing to do is provide long acting contraception free of charge, readily accessible, and with incentives so that feckless people don't "accidentally" have babies that turn into neglected children.

Rest of it is just ambulance at the bottom of the cliff.

I know that's not a kind view or a realistic one but I'm sick of seeing kids brought into the world who have no hope of a decent life at all, born to poverty. So yes, I stand by my view that the world would be a better place if policy settings encouraged more active promotion of long acting contraception.

Keroppi · 08/11/2021 11:52

@Avarua

Best thing to do is provide long acting contraception free of charge, readily accessible, and with incentives so that feckless people don't "accidentally" have babies that turn into neglected children.

Rest of it is just ambulance at the bottom of the cliff.

I know that's not a kind view or a realistic one but I'm sick of seeing kids brought into the world who have no hope of a decent life at all, born to poverty. So yes, I stand by my view that the world would be a better place if policy settings encouraged more active promotion of long acting contraception.

Yes, state funded sterilisation/eugenics is the answer Hmm
Waahingwashingwashing · 08/11/2021 11:59

@Avarua

Best thing to do is provide long acting contraception free of charge, readily accessible, and with incentives so that feckless people don't "accidentally" have babies that turn into neglected children.

Rest of it is just ambulance at the bottom of the cliff.

I know that's not a kind view or a realistic one but I'm sick of seeing kids brought into the world who have no hope of a decent life at all, born to poverty. So yes, I stand by my view that the world would be a better place if policy settings encouraged more active promotion of long acting contraception.

Define “feckless” please.
Etinoxaurus · 08/11/2021 12:12

I don't think there's another country in the world where contraception is more accessible. It' also free at the point of use.

QuattroFormaggi · 08/11/2021 12:41

I absolutely love this idea. But I also would have no idea of how to get it going. I work at a GO surgery that has a very active Social Prescribing/Social navigating dept (3 staff), which has been life-changing for many patients. I think that a combination of this kind of thing, with Homestart, with Trussel Trust/food banks, that would plug the gaps described by the OP.

I often think about the skills I have learned from parenting, navigating school and doctors, teaching my kids life skills, and what I have to offer - time, a big underused house, a car, and a comfortable income. Lots of people can't commit to regular hours in a charity shop, or can't drive there, but have lots of other things to offer. At the moment I'm looking at temporary refugee-hosting but I live in a rural area and there's few transient refugees here. Homestart training is on days when I'm at work and the children's centre is awash with volunteer staff (mostly young women looking for work experience before doing healthcare courses).

Let's keep talking about this though! Maybe the Mail will pick it up and donate £1m to a fund to get it started...Grin

Jason118 · 11/11/2021 11:33

There is a collective name for many of your suggestions. But once you speak its name, it becomes abhorrent to many.

TractorAndHeadphones · 11/11/2021 12:43

OP there are many organisations that do this. Small local charities, religious organisations etc. Church group members help each other out.

But once you start a registered charity you will need all sorts of official records and things like safeguarding.

Also another myth is that ‘volunteers’ are a good solution when in fact the level of coordination, health and safety etc means that it’s actually cheaper to pay staff. Many people can’t volunteer on a regular basis.

Honestly the best way to start would be to get an informal group of people together using your networks and see if you can help with specific things. Keep it within people you know, let it grow organically.

If that idea really takes off then you have proof to get funding and more organised help. You’ll learn along the way, you don’t need to get ‘expertise’ straight off the bat.

TractorAndHeadphones · 11/11/2021 12:45

Also a lot of this is very area specific and relates to community building. It doesn’t necessarily scale.

I’d say once you have a ‘pool’/community of people who interact naturally w.r.t support all of it becomes easier. Rather than having an official service people need to ‘phone’ into. I ask my friends favours for example which you also mentioned.

Ryannah · 11/11/2021 13:00

Safeguarding for under 18s would be a nightmare. It could work for adults because there’s less of a problem with safeguarding. Basically you’re talking about a skills exchange scheme. Sadly the group that would benefit the most (kids) would be ruled out due to safety concerns.

Camomila · 11/11/2021 13:24

It's a shame so many childrens centre's closed down, then this sort of thing could have happened organically without the need for DBS checks etc...e.g. you might make friends with a nice solicitor etc. at toddler group and ask her for advice on your landlord...and it would feel more equal because the nice solicitor might be feeling lonely or need some advice from a mum of older kids on sleep/potty training etc.

mynameismaybe · 11/11/2021 13:37

I had a similar idea for my sons football team; I suggested they create a hub for second hand football boots etc as not all the kids can afford them. I was completely. ignored. by. everyone.
I could of course pick up this idea and run with it and make it into something by myself...but going by the stale response I got at the beginning, it did make me wonder why bother. Such a shame.

UnbeatenMum · 11/11/2021 14:47

Agree some of these ideas are risky from a safeguarding perspective. Most organisations try to avoid adults being alone 1:1 with children because a clear DBS isn't enough, it only means that that person hasn't been caught yet. Even with a clear DBS, sending a child to practice piano in someone's house you just don't know who else might be there.
I could see something like a community homework club working, with multiple volunteers and multiple children. Also the medical appointment support could work if parents were also expected to be present. E.g. family support worker type role. School uniform also a great idea although my children's school already does this themselves so it's possible that other schools also do.

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