Does your child eat vegetables without a fight?

[mrfluffypinkpants]

At wits end with my 10year old who is an extremely picky eater! I thought when he was a baby/ toddler this stage would pass and he would become a 'normal' eater but this hasn't happened 😢 he seems to hate texture and things like stew, soup that are mixed together. He will only eat super noodles, chicken nuggets, sausages and a few other bits and pieces but I can't get him to eat any veg ( not even potatoes)
Please tell me if you too had a picky eater that eventually grew out of it?

I should add, he is very healthy, tall, fit, clever kid so he isnt some pasty wee frail thing sitting in the corner.

We have a rule that DS has to eat his fruit/veg or there are no treats (I.e. biscuits, ice cream etc.).

We started with small amounts of veg like cucumber, and slowly moved on from there.

It's really hard when you have a fussy eater - sometimes you just have to insist they at least give new things a 2-bite try.

Disclaimer: DS has no SEN

Not my DC but I was a very picky eater until about 12. My poor DDad could never face carrots after because they were the one vegetable I would eat so featured at every meal for a decade. I just suddenly found that I liked food. There were a few things that persisted until I was put in a position of having to eat them to be polite and found they were less bad than expected. As an adult the only things I actively avoid are scrambled egg, baked beans and tripe!

Nope - my DS is extremely picky & has I think some sort of sensory food thing going on.

He is growing at normal rate, is rarely ill, looks healthy & plays academy level footie.

We did go to have appointment with nutritionist but he does have food from each group. So pasta/bread/waffles as carbs, chicken nugget/fish fingers/mini yoghurt as protein, fruit smoothie or apple juice as fruit & few other things like croissants, cereal, milk. We also give him tonic minadex. It's really hard work going places & generally people aren't especially understanding.

The three things you've mentioned- potatoes, soups and stews - are three of the things that my 2 pull faces at still. I'd say they are pretty unfussy, and good eaters.

All 3 eat carrots and broccoli so they feature heavily here! They also eat finely chopped veg in things like spag bol, chilli etc although DC 2 complains a lot and often doesn’t eat the meal. She can have the plain pasta or rice or potatoes on those occasions. 2 out of 3 will have soup.

DC1 will eat raw carrots and scallions, DC2 will eat peppers, scallions and sugar snaps. DC 3 will eat tomatoes. So making lunch boxes or salady dishes is very bloody fiddly

No treats or pudding until veggies are eaten. On occasions, no screens either..

Ds will eat carrots, broccoli, peas, tomatoes, cucumber and all fruit except banana. I try new ones all the time but it's still slow going.

My DS is fairly good but I find what helps even more is if he comes to the greengrocers with me and chooses what he'd like that week. He will eat anything if he has been and picked it himself so we try to do that on a Saturday

I was like this as a child and I didn't grow out of it. As an adult I was diagnosed with ARFID and managed to improve with some therapy.
Might be worth investigating?

My DS is 40 and he has never eaten a vegetable in his life besides potatoes . Big strong man, does an active job, very fit and healthy.

never had any veg or fruit issues, sorry

they would always go off stuff at random times then later come round again.
or not! they all used to love red pepper now it's only 3 out of 7 who'll eat it.

they definitely all have their dislikes (and some have been called picky because they wouldn't eat some strange food dripping in oil🙄) which can be a bit annoying: currently we have some who'll eat sausages, some who likes chipolatas only, some who likes both and one who hates both and will only eat bbq jumbo sausages.
so I buy 3 kinds, I can cater for that.

other times I don't care, if it's brown rice not white rice they just have to eat it anyway!

I say pick your battles. fussy/picky eaters might never change their tastes and will resent you for daily food battles.
Have a negotiation: you will drop bothering him 6 days a week if once a week he can try one veg & one fruit. establish a list of all the things he'd be willing to try and let him pick. let him try raw or cooked versions - this can make a big difference!
I wouldn't give up introducing things, but if it's contained to one, predictable day a week it should reduce daily stress massively!

as you say he is otherwise healthy - are there any fruit or veg he'll eat? if yes just stick to those for a while to give yourselves a break from food wars, then try again as above

Most importantly please realise you are not a failure or a bad parent or whatever lies you are telling yourself just because your child has food preferences!! he is allowed to have them.

I know all children are different but the rule in our house is if veg isn't eaten there is no pudding. My children generally force it down so they get a pudding and this rule stands for anyone who come to our house so friends and children of the family and we have not had any notable issues.

one of mine eats all veg with enthusiasm. the other eats a pretty narrow range - peas/mangetout, carrots, broccoli, cabbage, spinach.

I manage it by offering stuff she likes half the time, and asking her just to have a single forkful of anything she doesn't like. I was forced to eat veg I disliked (and still do in some cases) and honestly, the memories are grim.

I started eating selected veg when I was about 16, in an effort to appear a bit more sophisticated.

@rainbowdashsneeze

I guess that works if there's pudding.
but we don't have pudding after every meal.

Also I had food forced on me when I was a kid which ended up in a puke-tsunami in the middle of the school dining room so I'd never make any kid force anything down just to get a treat.
If they genuinely hate something I think that's cruel. it was a horrible experience for me

5 year old does, 8 year old doesn't.

We make lots of stuff with hidden veg to avoid the fights.

My husband grew up eating basically one thing. He did grow out it, starting at university. In the early days of us dating he cooked me "his speciality"... I didn't realise it was the only thing he ate

I say he grew out of it, but I think it's more that he decided to change things and worked really hard at it. With our own children (one of whom is autistic) we encourage them to try one tiny bite but no more, and no sanctions if they don't. Texture is important so consider changing that up (eg raw vs cooked) and keep trying different things including strong flavours (olives, samphire - he might surprise you one day). Both our kids have had phases of eating little or no fruit or veg, and come out the other side.

Don't label him fussy or he will think of himself that way. He's too old for this now but when ours were small we tried to frame them as "good tryers", even if that was a bit of a stretch! If they think of themselves as someone who can try something new and might like it, it opens up possibilities and takes the pressure off.

I totally agree forcing a child to eat something they genuinely don't like is not ok. I give my children veg they do like. My youngest cannot stomach broccoli so I don't give her that I give her something else.
I am not a nasty person who forces the children to eat something that repulses them but I do have a rule that if it's not eaten they won't get a pudding.

I can’t believe how many people here are saying things like they insist their dc eat veg or they don’t get pudding etc etc. That’s one way to screw up their eating habits for life!! I was raised like that and there are still things I can’t eat now as an adult because they take me back to that sort of time and I feel physically sick. How would you like it if someone made you eat something you really didn’t like?!

My son has autism and has been under a dietician for a restrictive diet - for 3 years all he would eat was bread and tuna! He’s now 9 and will basically eat anything but we’ve been extremely laid back and don’t make any issue of anything at all, just offer things and then remove them if he doesn’t want them. The more of a thing you make about this the worse it will become.

Just to point out, saying 'no pudding until you eat your veggies' is not forcing anyone to eat anything.

I always make sure there are two or three veg. If my ds chooses not to eat any one of them, that's fine too.

Neither of mine are great with plain veg but they will eat it in curries or cottage pie etc They also like courgette or cauliflower fritters so I make those regularly!

They do eat fruit and a wide range of other foods so I don’t worry too much. I hated plain boiled/steamed veg until I was an adult

Mine won't eat any veg if it is mixed up in a sauce. They will generally eat peas, sweetcorn and (randomly) sprouts. They will also eat cucumber and tomatoes, and carrots but only if raw . I will insist on some veg with every meal but they can choose what kind. But I'm not overly worried about it because most children are fussy eaters and most grow out of it before adulthood.

The food drama in my house is around protein not veg. I wouldn't call either of my children good veg eaters but they each have a small range of things they'll reliably eat, either sweeter veg like peas and sweetcorn, raw veg like carrots and cucumber, or veg that doesn't look like veg like chickpeas. At the end of every meal though they both get a good multivitamin so I don't worry much about the veg. They eat plenty of fruit for the fibre and both seem pretty healthy. Finding sources of actual calories they'll eat though is a nightmare and one of them is right at the bottom of his healthy weight range. Getting kids to eat is such a headache!

I had one who would squash his peas with his fork and then say he couldn't eat them because they were dead; he also didn't like stew or any kind of mixed up meal, no gravy. My youngest survived on bread and butter, cream crackers and garlic sausage. Fortunately they all loved fruit, so much so that I would hide the bananas in the washing machine until the inevitable happened and I washed a bunch of bananas in with some clothes. They are all grown up and cook for their aged mother when they visit.

3 year old who loves cucumber, broccoli, carrots and green beans.

15 year old eats most things but not boiled potatoes, boiled rice, aubergine, courgette or Brussels. She "has to fancy" a mushroom. I hate mushrooms so I understand her POV. DD would ideally eat "beige" all day long but she eats a fairly varied diet with veggies, protein and other starchy foods.

11 year old doesn't. 14 year old loves vegetables.