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Original poster

What made your job unpleasant or toxic for you?

61 replies

HeyArnoldHey · 20/10/2021 18:54

Leaving my job and handing in my notice tomorrow. Feel so relieved but still somewhat nervous. I feel this place will have really effected my mindset and hope it doesn't damage me in my next role .
I thought I'd start a thread of what made your job unpleasant or toxic to you and why you moved on or are planning to? So I know I'm not alone!

For me.......

  • micromanagement to an inch of its life. Manager must know where we are constantly with high intense details of our personal life. Even wfh we have the message her when we go to the toilet Via messenger for no real reasoning . We must account for every task in our day and how long it took on a tracker . Multiple check ins a day even when off sick we will get a few texts , how are we? Are we back tomorrow? Have we been to the doctor?
  • mixed feedback. Given feedback for x . Will action then told they no longer want me to do x . Then a month or two later. Why am I not doing x ?
  • ideas are apparently encouraged but the minute you have one, manager will take over and tell you exactly how to do it until the fine detail allowing no room for your own creativity to flourish. It stopped me wanting to put forward ideas as you don't get to fully see through what you hoped.

There's more but I don't want to be too outing Grin

OP posts:
RoseRedRoseBlue · 20/10/2021 18:56

A manager who consistently fails to address poor performance and expects everyone to pick up the related slack 😡😡😡

whenwillthemadnessend · 20/10/2021 18:57

Mainly always comes down to management and the team itself. Xx

Original poster
HeyArnoldHey · 20/10/2021 18:59

@RoseRedRoseBlue

A manager who consistently fails to address poor performance and expects everyone to pick up the related slack 😡😡😡
Yes!!!!!! Lots of that to ! Extremely frustrating. Makes you think why do I bother?
OP posts:
Original poster
HeyArnoldHey · 20/10/2021 19:00

@whenwillthemadnessend

Mainly always comes down to management and the team itself. Xx
Definetely realised I had previously been blessed with great managers in my other roles . Even if they weren't great leaders atleast they let me breath and get on.
OP posts:
ShirleyPhallus · 20/10/2021 19:00

For me, the two main things are:

  • people (often puffed up men but also those women who pretend to get along with everyone but are backstabbing bitches) who take credit for other people’s ideas and treat others like they’re their resource, ie asking someone who is their level but a slightly different role to set up a meeting that they’re perfectly capable of doing
  • management who say and do different things, leaving your unsure of where you stand

Also bureaucracy, excessive rules making it tough to do your actual job, horrible office space without natural light, rubbish benefits, etc etc

BadlyFormedQuestion · 20/10/2021 19:06

The people, the ingrained toxic culture and horrific management.

Pythonista · 20/10/2021 19:07

Having files thrown at me by my boss (literally) on a regular basis was a particular highlight of my career

PaperMonster · 20/10/2021 19:09

Nothing that we did was ever right. We were one of the better performing teams in one of the only two good areas within the organisation. Yet nothing was ever good enough. We had a consultant come in periodically and tell us we had to do things one way, then six months later they’d be back telling us something different. Everyone was really unhappy and that unhappiness was contagious.

ChickenSchnitzel · 20/10/2021 19:09

Micromanagement and very hierarchical organisation. Massively dented my confidence and took a long time to get over in my next job.

OtterAndDog · 20/10/2021 19:11

Wait.. can you explain further the messaging when you go to the toilet!? I am so intrigued! Oddest behaviour from a boss ever.

Original poster
HeyArnoldHey · 20/10/2021 19:14

@ChickenSchnitzel

Micromanagement and very hierarchical organisation. Massively dented my confidence and took a long time to get over in my next job.
Yes this is my first ever experience in 15 years of working that I've had micromanagement and it's crazy how damaging it really is. It'll be strange to adjust back to 'normal'
OP posts:
Original poster
HeyArnoldHey · 20/10/2021 19:15

@OtterAndDog

Wait.. can you explain further the messaging when you go to the toilet!? I am so intrigued! Oddest behaviour from a boss ever.
Yes so my role isn't a call centre or anything which requires me to be present at my desk at all times however if we are out of sight, we must message 'going to the toilet' and 'back' every time. Same for making a drink Blush
OP posts:
SickAndTiredAgain · 20/10/2021 19:18

People thinking I was sleeping with my manager, because he did things like promote me to a role I applied and interviewed for, or ask me to cover his role when he was on holiday or paternity leave. I wasn’t sleeping with him, I was just good at my job. And I was good at his job. So I left and found a job where people didn’t think I used sex to get ahead.

There was another manager there who’d regularly shout and swear at people in the office. He also sexually harassed another woman who worked there, and when she told the MD (and showed him texts) she was told she’d taken it the wrong way.

amillionmenonmars · 20/10/2021 19:20

Not telling me about a major decision that would impact on my department and my working life so that I found out about it from a parent during their parent's evening appointment. This because the two people who made the decision were too gutless to tell me to my face.

Backstabbing colleague who wanted my job and did everything they could to make my job impossible to do. refused point blank to do tasks that were being imposed on us from management, yet was all sweetness and light when speaking to management herself.

Same person and her cronies not turning up to meetings I had to hold and chair every week. hen this was raised with my line manager nothing was done abut it.

All of the above led to my resigning. I was in the middle of something beyond my control. The person who wanted my job now has it - on less pay and with even more responsibilities. I give them two years before they burn out.

girlmama86 · 20/10/2021 19:24

In my last job for a private nursery we were overworked and underpaid, overtime was supposed to given back on days where we were quiet instead of being paid but that rarely happened.
Most of us worked 40 hours over 4 days so 1 day off a week but without fail the manager phoned you on your day off to ask you to cover someone who was off sick.
Employees and the children were just numbers really, it was all about the money and profits, they weren't bothered about anyone's welfare.
I've no idea why I stuck it out as long, I was there 10 years.

SpamIAm · 20/10/2021 19:26

Head of department was generally a bit shit. Did whatever he could to avoid doing work, didn't give a shit about providing a quality service and, despite not engaging in any of the work of the department, still stifled any development.

All came to a head when he fucked up (like major fuck up - enforcement action, external review etc etc) and blamed myself and a colleague. Even had the audacity to say in a minuted meeting that we were struggling to come to terms with our mistake.

I left in June and am so much happier now, both in work and out. I didn't realise what a negative effect being there was having on me in general, even while I was off on maternity leave. My new team has its flaws, but I feel like a valued member and everyone wants to do the best job we can. And my head of department is lovely and very pro service improvement!

Ekofisk · 20/10/2021 19:32

Male line manager berated me for not being able to lie convincingly enough to colleagues at other sites about impending site closures. And apparently he didn’t like the look of my face.

Had to hide the car keys to stop DH going in for a “discussion”.

Katkinsgreyy · 20/10/2021 19:36

Micromanagement!
Drove me crackers! When everything you do is wrong and picked apart, it's hard to stay motivated.

ThesecondLEM · 20/10/2021 19:39

One person in particular has made a topic work place for me. What was meant to be my forever job has been ruined by this one particular toxic bitch. That, coupled by weak management at the local and regional level resulting in us not being able to offer a good service to our clients.

I'm out! I leave in two weeks

Minniem2020 · 20/10/2021 19:40

The customers that think they can speak to you like shit because they're on the end of the phone but wouldn't dare do it if you were face to face.
And big brother constantly watching you, we too have to advise when we're at the toilet and explain why if they think we've taken too long. I get some people take the piss but they can see from records the ones that do and dont

LadyCleathStuart · 20/10/2021 19:45

In a pre meet ahead of a large stakeholder meeting my manager told me to bring up a certain issue - then when I did he berated me in front if everyone for bringing it up. If another colleague hadn't witnessed it I would have thought I was going mad.

Same manager would often agree courses of action then give me a dressing down for them at a later date. I complained but of course it was all my fault and I was pressured to move on.

CeliaCanth · 20/10/2021 19:54

Micromanagement, favouritism and “fawning up and bullying down” are probably the worst I’ve experienced. Also, at the start of my career, I worked in a firm (Magic Circle law firm) where you were never praised - however, if you made a mistake, you’d never be given work by that particular partner again. Turnover was, unsurprisingly, pretty high…

VeronicaBeccabunga · 20/10/2021 19:54

Having a manipulative toxic liar of a line manager.

Cannot believe I was taken in for so long.

WhatsTheEffingPoint · 20/10/2021 19:55

A few things:
2 Managers (H&W). W flits in and out of the business, then decides shes setting up in a completely different field. I couldnt deal with her flakiness (it wasnt the first time she had done this apparently)

Both managers spending lots of time involving us 3 staff members in a big rebrand etc then looking at the accounts and deciding we werent doing to well so letting the 2 consultants go (all decided overnight) then spending £600+ on a lamp, that was apparently office lighting in the accounts. Well i never saw that lamp in the office but it was at their home.

I think the biggest was the Husband getting his wife to try and score him coke at the christmas meal. and then a few days later cancelling business meetings in london as he had been out the night before with friends and was coked up.

seb342 · 20/10/2021 20:09

My manager.