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Original poster

relocating to south wales

104 replies

Butcherf1988 · 19/10/2021 16:58

Hi,
I am currently living in an affluent area in poverty and totally isolated. I am never able to afford to take my children to clubs, and have been dependent on benefits for 4 years (although im slowly starting a business). I'm living in a house i was badly abused in. It is terrible for my mental health :( My ex abusive partner is refusing to sell the home, yet he does nothing with the children either. I grew up socially in a non affluent area. In south wales i can afford a home, afford to learn to drive, and my self-employed business is getting going. All my money is tied up in this house. It's making me depressed. Ive seen that over in south wales, i can not only afford to buy a house, but can afford to learn to drive, transport is more accessible, and id be able to afford to take my children to do out-of-school clubs/activites, which theyre not accessing at all here. We do love the outdoors, and see that over in wales there is Brecon and the mountians nearby. I was wondering what other people's views are on making the move. Evidently this style of living is not doing my health any good, and im unable to take the children to any out of school activites due to lack of money and lack of mobility. We're growing up poor in an aflfuent area where friends go to all sorts of out of school aciviteis, and we do nothing. Yet, over in south wales, with my money freed up from the proerty, i'll be able to afford a home, secure financial security, remove debts, be self-employed, and learn to drive, and do activities with the girls. I was wondering what areas of south wales are best? Best wishes, Fliss

OP posts:
NavigatingAdolescence · 20/10/2021 13:38

Y Pant’s catchment is now smaller than ever before with more kids having to go to Bryncellynog. You really need to live in pontyclun to get into Y Pant and that ain’t cheap.

Dmsandfloatydress · 20/10/2021 13:49

Y pant in the only good one on your list!

Dmsandfloatydress · 20/10/2021 14:03

I would consider, for your budget, looking at Neath, swansea or a place called Beaufort as if you live in Beaufort your children can get into Crickhowell Comprehensive which has an excellent reputation.

Nomorescreentime · 20/10/2021 14:04

Yea there is unlikely to be anything in Y Pant catchment in your budget. They go very quickly if they do come up as the school is crazy popular.

Dmsandfloatydress · 20/10/2021 14:11

There are some really nice houses in neath in your budget.

haveyouopenedyourbowelstoday · 20/10/2021 14:16

Have a look at Blackwood, Caerphilly and Ystrad Mynach.
Various schools, good transport links, in amazing countryside.

curiouscatgotkilled · 20/10/2021 14:37

We made the move four years ago and love it. It definitely took a while to adjust and not feel like we were on holiday but we have all settled now.
We live in a nice village near the town of Caerphilly which is also a half hour drive or 15 minute train to Cardiff.
There are too many good points to list, but in the main I love being in the 'countryside' but also close to a wonderful capital city.
Everything is more affordable but not cheap cheap like maybe further into the valleys. There is plenty for the kids to do (dancing, gymnastics, band, usual cubs guides etc and all the other clubs) lovely places to go out and their schools are smaller and much more sociable and cosy.
People are so much more friendly and life is more laid back and so much less judgemental, everyone just seems to rub along and take you as you are.

I say make the move!

Dmsandfloatydress · 20/10/2021 15:19

I would also look at Pontypool. Torfaen is generally more affluent than the other valleys so a bit nicer to live in with better transport links. You could get a three bed for your budget

Waternoice · 20/10/2021 15:38

I'm quite a fan of Cwmbran. It would be affordable on your budget and has lots on offer, such as a cinema/bowling complex, sports stadium, even a little theatre, a train station, schools and a largeish shopping centre
The town centre housing is showing its age, as much of it was built iin the 60s and 70s, but you really are on the edge of some glorious countryside and within 5 minutes are in Monmouthshire, which is rural and packed full of lovely walks, bike rides, castles to visit, etc
www.visitmonmouthshire.com/things-to-do/castles-in-monmouthshire.aspx

IamEarthymama · 20/10/2021 19:01

I live just north of Newport and have worked in Newport and surrounding areas for 30 years. I love it here.

I was born at the top of the valley, left to go to university in the North West and stayed there for 20 years. I loved it but I missed Wales so moved back for an MA in Newport.

As with anything else and anywhere else life is what you make it.
Though OP you have had such dreadful constraints placed on you that this will be a wonderful opportunity for you and your family.
I can be in Cardiff by train in 30 minutes.
We have a great local cinema, there are great creative initiatives locally as we come out of lockdown, live music and theatre too.

It's beautiful here, I give thanks for my surroundings every day.
We have a great youth club in the village and though there are a few kids playing up the vast majority are good as gold.

The house PP posted is in the village where my daughter brought her children up. It's lovely and if you are friendly people will be too.

OP If you come here to live PM me and I will meet up and welcome you and yours.

Fangdango · 20/10/2021 19:54

This is a gorgeous spot in Pontypridd OP - would need to get bus into town or 20 minute walk, but you're five minutes from major bus route. It's typical of the kind of setting you can find around the Valleys if you shop around - straight out to forest walk, river walk, hillside but not remote.

There are lots of solid Victorian / Edwardian terraces around, often really well cared for

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/114319925?utm_campaign=property-details&utm_content=buying&utm_medium=sharing&utm_source=copytoclipboard#/&channel=RES_BUY

OverByYer · 20/10/2021 20:08

@haveyouopenedyourbowelstoday

[[https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/109351145?utm]]campaign=property-details&utmmcontent=buying&utmmedium=sharing&utmmsource=copytoclipboard#/&channel=RES_BUY

This is between Risca and Newbridge.

That’s a lovely house and the schools and facilities there are great for a young family
OverByYer · 20/10/2021 20:11

[quote Waternoice]I'm quite a fan of Cwmbran. It would be affordable on your budget and has lots on offer, such as a cinema/bowling complex, sports stadium, even a little theatre, a train station, schools and a largeish shopping centre
The town centre housing is showing its age, as much of it was built iin the 60s and 70s, but you really are on the edge of some glorious countryside and within 5 minutes are in Monmouthshire, which is rural and packed full of lovely walks, bike rides, castles to visit, etc
www.visitmonmouthshire.com/things-to-do/castles-in-monmouthshire.aspx[/quote]
I live in Cwmbran and it’s been a lovely safe place to raise a family. Schools have been a bit so so, but my two did ok. Happy to give any advice about living here , Newport or surrounding areas

OverByYer · 20/10/2021 20:16

Griffithstown in Pontypool is lovely and on the up
www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/107822144#/?channel=RES_BUY

Fangdango · 20/10/2021 20:21

Come back and tell us as you find properties you like OP and I'm sure one of us will have local info Smile

OverByYer · 20/10/2021 20:27

Blackwood is a nice little town too, with lots of amenities

Original poster
Butcherf1988 · 21/10/2021 11:33

Thank you so much for all your advice. I've been having to do some studying deadlines so not had chance to come back on here. You are all SO helpful. Yes, i am so restricted and controlled by me ex living here, that I think freedom would overide the pretty countryside here. At the end of the day, where i live is becoming more buiiilt-up because so many workers from London are trying to get "cheaper" housing. I also have the dreaded HS2 London/Birmingham railway line cutting across the countryside near my village. I mentioned that i spent time in refuge in Redditch on a huge housing estate with no countryside in view, but plenty of amenities. I need something in-between the two - a place where there are amenities but not far from countryside too. At the moment my ex is so controlling. He knows this house i live in because it isn't "mine". It's "ours". Yet he's unwilling to pay for repairs - we have a broken conservatory roof pannel - i cannot afford to repair it, yet he's refusing because he doesnt live in the property , and yet he's forcing me and the girls to live here. It's awful. And my mental health suffers. I will come over and take a look I think. Being near to Brecon sounds good. But also from what's been said, Neath and Newport sounds convenient too. I did think that, once I'm over, I'll get a better idea of the area anyway, and can freely move without having to seek "permission" from my ex-abusive husband. Secondary schools in my region are over-subscribed too. Is the government not building enough schools? If a child joins a school during the school year, do they still need to live in the catchment? Or, as it is a mid-school year admission, does the catchment not matter? I'm open-minded with regards to judging a "good" school as the primary school my girls currently go to is, "in need of improvement". The headteacher was awful, staff turnover was high and pupils weren't sufficiently progressing, and there was bullying! It's not always about having "academic" children in the school, it's also about good teaching. If children within a school make good progress, it means the teaching is good. I didn't go to an aflfuent school when i grew up, and lived on a main road in a not great town, but i still succeeded , went to university, and had an amazing social life out of school. I must say that this situation im currently in, really is making me appreciate what my parents did for me!

OP posts:
Original poster
Butcherf1988 · 21/10/2021 11:38

[quote OverByYer]Griffithstown in Pontypool is lovely and on the up
www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/107822144#/?channel=RES_BUY[/quote]
That house looks nice. and not far from countryside and amenities! Thank you.

OP posts:
Original poster
Butcherf1988 · 21/10/2021 11:47

Once this house is sold, i'll have the cash freed up to learn to drive. My life is on hold. My ex knows that too, that by selling i'll be able to learn to drive due to the assets. He's horrible. I do need a completely fresh start. He works from home, self-employed, has no friends, rents and is fully mobile, and so he has nothing connecting him to this region, other that controlling me through not selling the house. He never takes the girls to clubs - i was never allowed to socialise whilst i was together with him because he didnt like me having friends. He doesnt let them wear clothes from his house round to this house, the same with tablets. It seems so controlling. I'm dreading court because he's asked for full access based on me being psychologically unwell, incompetent at looking after this house, and not providing sufficiently for the children. He's giving as little maintenance as possible, and yet rents a barn conversion! He's not a nice person. He doesn't think about the girls :(

OP posts:
Brightmagic · 21/10/2021 12:13

Would he obstruct you moving away? It depends on the age of the children but get some legal advice on that.

Original poster
Butcherf1988 · 21/10/2021 12:13

I live not far from Aylesbury, and many local people say Aylesbury is a "dump". And "Bicester" too. both towns are having loads of new estates built to cope with demand form people in london seeking more space. It sort of depends on what people classify as a "dump". I don't classify them as a "dump" because both towns have local amenities, all the shops you need, cinema, pubs, restaurants, but also some very deprived districts with high crime and drugs, but some nicer areas too. I rented in Oxford for a while, when i worked there. I rented in a cheaper area of the city (it's ridiculously expensive town - yet also has some of the most deprived estates in the country - believe it or not), but transport was so good, and i still was able to socialise and join sports clubs elsewhere in the town, and as i was on the city outskirts, countryside was nearby. I certainly didnt have mental health problems when living there. So, I'm openminded. And i like old properties. I grew up in a victorian terrace, rented in victorian terraces in Oxford, and currently live in an Edwardian terrace! I've learnt a lot whilst being in this village, and there are even people who smoke cannabis here. I smell it. Maybe they buy it from the bad estates in Aylesbury or Bicester ... Are neighbours friendly in Wales? In the village people seem to keep themselves to themselves. I think me and the girls need some social life, but not over the top ... Although, when they become teenagers, i'm sure they'll want more active life-style with their friends ...

You're all so really friendly on this site :) Thank you so much for your tips :)

OP posts:
NavigatingAdolescence · 21/10/2021 12:42

Admission criteria applies for in year moves, yes.

FTEngineerM · 21/10/2021 13:23

Are neighbours friendly in Wales?

Yes.

After 3 decades and 3 moves on the whole they’re lovely. The out pour of cards and gifts for our DC when they were born shows just how kind they are. Some we had never spoken to.

Fangdango · 21/10/2021 19:40

@FTEngineerM

Are neighbours friendly in Wales?

Yes.

After 3 decades and 3 moves on the whole they’re lovely. The out pour of cards and gifts for our DC when they were born shows just how kind they are. Some we had never spoken to.

Oh yes, and you don't have to be local to make friends.