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Original poster

7 year old doesn’t want to have sleepovers

28 replies

Annoyedandirritated · 16/10/2021 18:29

What age were your kids when they started sleepovers? My nearly 8 year old point blank doesn’t want to either attend or have any at ours. She’s missing out on friendships forming though in an already small group of 4 girls in her class. (Tiny class). Should I encourage her to try it or just leave it another year or so?

OP posts:
CruCru · 16/10/2021 18:48

That’s all right. Not everyone enjoys sleepovers. I used to find them a real trial.

MayorGundersonsDogRufus · 16/10/2021 18:50

DD started wanting them at around that age, but when we finally did she was nervous and missed us a lot. It's still quite young so I wouldn't say your DD is unusual at all.

scully29 · 16/10/2021 18:52

Thats an easy one, you dont do sleepovers! Mine 8 and 6 have never done one, they dont want to. I cant imagine why it would be a good idea to do it if they didnt want to? Just do more playdates if your worried about friends.

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immersivereader · 16/10/2021 18:52

Don't blame her. Let her be

WillYouDoTheFandango · 16/10/2021 18:53

DS is 8 and he hates sleeping out. None of the boys in his class seem to do them either. I didn’t go on one til I was 12. I don’t think your DD will miss out.

Brollywasntneededafterall · 16/10/2021 18:54

Secondary school age only here...
Or Tbf it's child care!!

YodaiamsaidI · 16/10/2021 18:56

My dd likes having sleepovers here but wont sleep out,which I prefer as can't vet other parents

Aliveandkicking23 · 16/10/2021 18:56

My 12 year old DGs will only stay at our house.
Even though he's invited to his friends houses.
Won't even stay at his dads.

Numbersarefun · 16/10/2021 18:56

My youngest couldn’t manage them at that age. She’d try and then at about 9.30pm I’d get a phone call to pick her up! She’s away at Uni now and manages just fine.

PatchworkElmer · 16/10/2021 18:59

I wasn’t happy doing them until I was about 13, I just didn’t feel safe.

MsLizard · 16/10/2021 19:01

I hated sleepovers until I was about 14.

ThePoisonousMushroom · 16/10/2021 19:04

My 8 year old has never been on one, she has been invited but doesn’t want to. Doesn’t seem to be affecting her friendships.
My 6 year old on the other hand loves them and has plenty.

BananaPB · 16/10/2021 19:10

Can you pick her up late (say at 9pm) instead ? I wouldn't worry that she doesn't like them - it's not like she's off to uni next year and might want/need to live away from home

PolicecarOnAToe · 16/10/2021 19:11

My 10 yr old dd (almost 11) will not sleep out. She is quite anxious in general and just is not interested in sleep overs. She still has plenty of friends, and we have her friends over for dinner or for ‘play dates’, just no sleep overs.

MushMonster · 16/10/2021 19:12

If she does not like them, I would leave till she is ready.

Hoppinggreen · 16/10/2021 19:12

DS always hated them.
He went on a couple and had a couple here but he didn’t enjoy them really. He’s 12 now and had a friend to sleepover in the summer holidays but the friend slept in the spare room.

Flowersintheattic2021 · 16/10/2021 19:16

Y6. No chance before.

unsure111 · 16/10/2021 19:19

My 10 year old refuses to go to sleepovers. Most the time she goes for a few hours and comes home just before they settle down for the night.

trumpisagit · 16/10/2021 19:22

My 12 year old won't do them. He has tried, but he doesn't enjoy them.

Dangermouse80 · 16/10/2021 19:25

Don't push it. No point doing this before they are ready. I am quite happy to not have to do these yet (kids 8 / 5 / 4). I didn't really enjoy them as a kid till I was a teenager.

Nevermindthesquirrels · 16/10/2021 19:26

My 13 year old has never ever liked them. She still hates it and is in Y9.

In your position what I would do is speak to the parents about possibly having a 'late over'. Let her go and pick her up 11pm/12am or whatever time they get to sleep.
This was really great for DD as she was with them for the best part of it. I think most kids hate the part where they are waking at their mates, not sure when breakfast is, need to poo lol etc etc and leave soon after the sleepover is over anyway.

thewhatsit · 16/10/2021 19:27

I don’t remember doing them myself before year 6. Seems a little young.

Monr0e · 16/10/2021 19:29

Both my dcs (15 and 11) dislike them.
DS has only stayed out a handful of times e.g for a friends birthday. He just doesn't enjoy then. DD will only sleep over at one friend's house that she has known for years and whose parents are family friends.

For DD we would have what we called a sleepover that wasn't a sleepover. She would have a couple of friends over, they would put their jammies on and I'd put a double blow up bed in the living room. They'd have hot chocolate and pop corn and watch a movie then their parents would pick them up late evening

Gatehouse77 · 16/10/2021 19:29

We started a lot younger than that 😱 but we didn’t have family nearby to babysit so we’d do overnight for friends and vice versa so you could have a lie in the morning after your child free night.
However, all parties had to be comfortable and willing or we called it off. Never had any drama over it either. There was the odd occasion when a child was really unhappy so parents were called, child returned and better luck next time 🤷‍♀️

Queenoftheflumps02 · 16/10/2021 19:35

About 18! My DD hated sleepovers, she just liked her own bed. She very occasionally slept over at her grandparents, but she just wasn't interested in going to a sleep overs. She has just gone off to university and is happily settled in halls, so in the long run it really didn't matter.

I'm sure your DS will get there in his own time and if he doesn't, I'm not sure it really matters.