How do I get rid of a ball of pain (anxiety I think)

[Snowdropsandbluebells]

I don't want to contact the gp but I will if I need to but years ago she gave me tablets for reactive anxiety/ possible depression
They made me feel a bit dead for want of a better word

I have had a lot of let downs/stress recently. My dh and kids are great and homelike lovely and good job (on paper)

But my work is under new management and things are diabolical (teacher) I cannot leave for a few years (long story)
My brothers child is being christened and I haven't been invited due to long issues with me standing up to my parents and a mother who is emotionally abusive. I'm not going to fight this one but it hurts.
The work situation I have put my own plan in place fo retrain and I also told middle management how I feel. It caused me great anxiety internally but for the first time in my life I was strong and assertive. In one way I feel relief but I also feel hollow with a big ball of pain (like real physical pain).

I feel like I need to run for hours to get it out. But I am in no way fit (only half joking)
I want to feel better
My kids are so lovely and dh is great If a big non emotive at times.

Bit not big

Have you considered mindfulness practice?

YouTube has an almost infinite amount of led practices. Start with a body scan.

Mindfulness practice has helped hugely with my anxiety.

If exercise doesn't help, I would go to your GP. There's nothing wrong with getting help when it's needed.

I totally understand that physical pain- I've battled it for years in and off. Running has helped, although o can't anymore, but Escitalopram has been a lifesaver. The pain and tension is so exhausting.

I was actually going to suggest exercise, to ensure you’re physically tired to help you sleep. Also to find something to distract yourself from ruminating. In your day to day activities it’s possible to continue with your negative thoughts ticking along in the background, so you need to think of something to do that is pretty all consuming and physical to detract from what’s upsetting you. The more you can break away the smaller they can become.

Doing some exercise is a great plan. I find walking very good for this. It kind of gives the anxious part of your brain something to do (stay upright, don't walk into things etc ) so you can think about the other stuff in a more analytical way.

Where is the pain? Maybe it is physical?

If it's not anything physical and you've been checked by your gp op I highly recommend walking.

I've built up some good podcasts on my phone and bought a decent pair of headphones and trainers.

I try and honesty on my two days off while everyone else is in bed and a cpl of evenings a week when I've got time.

It literally is a mind saver for me.
When it's early and quiet and you can stomp or slow your pace it's amazing.

If I've had a stressy week I find I'm stomping to start with and then gradually I get to a good pace and realise I'm calmer.

Thanks so much for taking the time to listen.
I am considering doing a creative course to distract me from all of these thoughts. I might go back to a running club nearby (I am always at the back but everyone is lovely and supportive)

I feel like I have have house the dh and kids. I don't want to live with this big ball of pain or whatever it that hard to describe. So nany people are taking advantage at work (absolute pisstaking) and nothing is being done.
My brother says I did nothing for the family due to moving away to university and he carried the family (bullshit)
I deserved to go to university.
I deserve to be happy.

We all do

I have had a constant upset stomach every morning for the past few weeks (I don't know if thats related)

The gp knows where I work and told me to leave it years ago. I am now part time but live in a rural area with very few options.

What’s your ball of pain? My old doctor took one look at me and said ah your a teacher your pain in anxiety. It wasn’t I lived with it for a long time until I moved house, went to another GP and I was sent to hospital within 5 mins of being in her room, admitted to hospital and told I couldn’t leave until they operated.

Yes you need to get checked properly

Oh my goodness fallagain you were lucky

Yoga - it’s incredible both physically and emotionally. I do it daily; some classes are very strength based and others more gentle but all require focus on breathing. I can say with certainty it’s helped with my anxiety and release of tension.