Starting again after seperation

[JadeNaomi]

Good morning all, I’m new here 🙋🏼‍♀️
To keep it brief (although my mind is bursting)
I separated from my abusive husband about 7 months ago, we have no structure with the kids or money or anything really as he’s still trying to control me 😔 I met someone 3 months ago who has also been separated for the same amount of time (they are more amicable) but the thing is I think I’ve fallen in love with him and his body language and actions make me feel he has but when I get the courage to talk about the future or feelings he kind of brushes past it then tells me not to worry about stuff and moves on to something else 🤷🏼‍♀️ I’m confused, any advice? Be gentle! X

You are still getting over an abusive relationship and trying to set boundaries with your ex as you parent your children. You're also remembering who you really are. It's really important that you get a strong sense of yourself before you get involved in another relationship - for your kids and for your own sake.

Please take it easy, enjoy this man's company if you like but put your own oxygen mask on first.

Thankyou 😊 it’s wasn’t planned but I’ve definitely fallen in deep with him and feel sick to my stomach at the thought of losing him (especially as I’m not sure how he feels about the future and I’m too scared to bring it up for fear of rejection) I know this isn’t great and I’m a counsellor myself so know it’s not healthy 😔

You're going way too fast

What would you say to a client in this situation?

Pretty much what you said to me in the first message, I taken a step back and trying to focus on me but I’m finding it difficult as I grown attached to him (I only see him every fortnight but speak every day)

It's easier to start doing something else than it is to stop doing what you're doing now. Can you make a list of all the things you could do instead of thinking about him/contacting him and do those instead?