Is there something in your life you’ve never just been able to get a handle on?

[TheRealAnnabelleBronstein]

I have a pretty great life. Lovely family, happy marriage, lovely home, financially comfortable, job I love, always had lots of opportunities to travel and do interesting things.

Pretty healthy too (currently under treatment for a severe health issue but it’s a recent diagnosis and treatable so considering it a temporary blip!).

On paper, I have it all pretty good but my attitude to my weight has been the bane of my life. I yo-yo diet, I starve myself, binge, starve, binge etc. I started my first diet when I was eight. I have major issues around food I’ve never been able to get past. I’ve tried everything from diets to therapy and I just can’t get past my food issues.

My first thought when I wake in the morning is my weight. It’s my last thought at night.

I feel like everyone I meet is judging me. I can’t eat with people, except my husband. If anyone else is around I don’t eat and often then binge later.

I’m a rationale, intelligent woman and I can’t get a handle on this. I think I’ll be 90 and still beat myself up over food.

Can anyone relate? Not even just about weight, but in having a fairly together life, and something that just takes over and makes you feel like a total failure?

So so many things.

'Going with the flow'. I'm a terrible over-thinker. It's exhausting, I swear it's the main cause of my ongoing insomnia and it turns so many probably easy-to-solve situations into rabbit-holes of thought and worry.

I wish I could be more laid back.

On a far less bothersome note- physics and chemistry. Still as baffling today as they were when I was at school.

Cleaning. I tidy every day but proper cleaning like wiping skirting boards, removing cobwebs, wiping the front of cupboards or cleaning the bathroom tiles just passes me by. I can effectively ignore it until an important guest arrives and then it suddenly becomes the only thing I can see.

Keeping my house and things neat, tidy and organised. It's down to executive dysfunction for me, I am autistic and my brain just... misfires, when it comes to household tasks and admin. I put everything off until it becomes an emergency, I am much better now than I was thanks to being diagnosed as an adult and realising my brain just works differently and that I need to just do things in a way that works for me. But when people walk in the house and exclaim "oh Dinosaur, it's tidy!" It feels like I just can't adult the majority of the time. I joke that I can only have one tidy room in my house, but really I don't know how people can make their living spaces pristine all the time! 3 neurodiverse kids and an ND husband probably doesn't help either as it means none of us are very good at it.

Same as you OP- weight issues.
And have never learnt to apply make up so at the age of 45 have never worm foundation apart from on my wedding day .
Got great skin though lol!

Worn not worm!

Yeah, it's friends for me. I've friends from school and university but never made adult friends, anyone new is through DH. Youngest is nearly through primary and never made any mum friends, just got friendly with one or two couples that was more to do with DH than me again.