I want to cancel my dentist appointment

[SolitaryTree]

I have a dentist appointment in the morning and I need some fillings. I have lots of old fillings that were done about 20+ years ago that the dentist wants to take out and re-fill as an X-ray showed a bit of decay underneath them. They’re metal ones too so there’s going to be allot of work. Im booked in for 1 hour.
I need 4 fillings I think.
I’m supposed to have them done tomorrow morning but I’m so worried that I’m currently thinking that I’ll call first thing and cancel and pay the fee if necessary for not giving them enough notice.
Im anxious for allot of reasons.
I hate how bright the light is in your face, I hate not knowing where to look, I hate the dentist being so close to me and having his hands in my mouth. I hate being trapped in the chair and not being able to leave. I’d have to have injections and I hate the feel of the needle and the numb mouth even more. I hate the sounds and the smells of all the dentistry stuff and I panic that I’m going to choke or that my jaw is going to lock constantly. I also hate the taste in my mouth from anything to do with the dentist.
How can I talk myself into going and feel less anxious?
I know it’s in my best interests to get the work done but I’m so anxious I’m genuinely contemplating just leaving it instead.

That’s what I thought but I didn’t want to sound rude. The receptionist said that she’ll ask the dentist but the dentist said no when he was asked. I feel a bit annoyed but also know that it’s my own fault for being late.

@SolitaryTree

That’s what I thought but I didn’t want to sound rude. The receptionist said that she’ll ask the dentist but the dentist said no when he was asked. I feel a bit annoyed but also know that it’s my own fault for being late.

Now you’re home abs calm, do you think you’re in a better place kick up a bit of a fuss?

If this is an NHS dentist I’m not at all surprised they wouldn’t see you. Even a private one generally wouldn’t.

Do you think you self sabotaged yourself this morning given your didn’t want to be there?

@AtLeastPretendToCare

If this is an NHS dentist I’m not at all surprised they wouldn’t see you. Even a private one generally wouldn’t.

Do you think you self sabotaged yourself this morning given your didn’t want to be there?

Really? 8 minutes late for an hour appointment to do multiple fillings? They wouldn’t have considered doing some with others on a different appointment?

@PurpleDaisies I wouldn’t know what to say! It’s the dentist that my children and me use so I don’t want them to get annoyed with me either!
If I say anything then they’re still not going to see me today and I’m booked in again for November 3rd so I’ll probably just put it down to experience and keep on working hard at my time keeping.

@AtLeastPretendToCare I do understand the rule on lateness but I truly didn’t self sabotage.
I’m just so bad at timekeeping.
It really stresses me out as I have alarms set for things all of the time, a clock in every room of the house and STILL I manage to be late for so many things.

Even if I'm on time we always have to wait at least 8 mins for our appt. I wonder if he got a private emergency he preferred to deal with

You need to tell them that you're scared of going to the dentist to the point of having a phobia

Oh what a shame.

This thread inspired me, I called the dentist back and rebooked my filling after cancelling the last appointment! It's not til November 23rd though.

I’ve got a root canal on Wednesday and I’m feeling the same. I’ve never dreaded a dentist appointment before, even when I had a broken tooth extracted years ago. It’s just the thought of them drilling through my tooth, it sounds vile. Earphones are a good idea, might try that.

I understand how you feel OP. I hate going to the dentist. I’m a child of the 70s and I blame it on dentistry and, in particular, a dentist I had back then.

The dentist I go to always send an appointment through the post and I always cancel it and rebook for another date. I feel that gives me some control over when I go, silly I know.

I had my first appointment last month since Covid shut down the dentists. I really had to psyche myself up for it even though it was just a check up.
When I got there (it takes two buses to get there so I have far too long with my own thoughts on the journey) I found out that they’d actually cancelled my appointment and hadn’t informed me!
They were adamant that they’d called my mobile the previous week, apparently I hadn’t answered and a voicemail had been left. I’d had nothing, I even showed them that there wasn’t a missed call from them on my phone. I’d have felt like I’d won the lottery if they’d cancelled on me.

Embarrassingly I was in tears, I explained how scared I was and that I’d psyched myself up all week for the appointment and definitey wouldn’t have been there unnecessarily. They spoke to the dentist and she was able to fit me in for a check up between appointments but I needed a clean so I had to go back last week for that.

I wasn’t looking forward to that but the dentist was brilliant and kept checking that I was okay.

Brushing my teeth makes me gag so much, also having loads of foamy minty saliva in my mouth makes me feel sick too

Use an electric toothbrush - you don't have to "brush" with it, you just move it over your teeth and it does the work. No pushing it back and forth - no gagging. And use SLS-free toothpaste ( SLS is what makes the foam, so these toothpastes don't do that at all). Oranurse is a good one - it has no foam and no flavour.

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I would definitely see you if only 8 minutes late for an hour appointment! Surely they do 2 of the fillings instead of 4?

@Generallystruggling

I’ve got a root canal on Wednesday and I’m feeling the same. I’ve never dreaded a dentist appointment before, even when I had a broken tooth extracted years ago. It’s just the thought of them drilling through my tooth, it sounds vile. Earphones are a good idea, might try that.

Sorry you're dreading it @Generallystruggling. I've had root canal and tbh it didn't feel any different than a normal filling except that it took a bit longer.

keep your eyes closed

I find it helpful to concentrate on how long until it’s over. “Only 2 hours and then I will be outside, all done”.

Also sorry to be that person, but since you mention finding the lights/sounds/smells overwhelming and that you have trouble getting to things on time, have you considered that you might have ADHD or something similar?

Would your dentist prescribe Diazapam? I'm OK with the procedures generally, but very not OK with the injection part. The last few times I've needed work requiring an injection, the dentist prescribed a single Diazapam tablet. It means I can't drive myself to and from the appointment, but has definitely been worth it.

Go to your gp explain your anxiety and ask them to prescribe a light sedative that you can take before you go. That should help you relax and 'zone out' as well as headphones for the noise etc.

@MeredithMae good luck!
@HoneyDewMel yes I think I need to. I sort of get stuck inside myself feeling terrified but am able to outwardly seem ok I suppose.
@starrynight21 thank you very much. I will look for some of that. I already have an electric toothbrush which does help with my teeth but not my tongue. I use a tongue scraper too but that makes me gag when I look at the saliva that comes off (it’s making me want to be sick just typing it)
@Generallystruggling good luck for tomorrow!
@PartyStory yes I have. That works for some things sometimes but not in the dentist, it’s just so overwhelming that every minute feels like an hour.
I really don’t like medication, I don’t know why. I think eyes closed, EarPods in, something in my hands is going to be the most helpful.
I will be super super organised next time and make sure I definitely get there on time.