My toddler hates preschool... and other children in general!

[Hogu]

He used to be petrified of other children since lockdown but had improved no end. He's fine to be around them so long as I'm there (or another familiar adult) . He hates it when other children get loud and puts his fingers in his ears and cries.

This week was his 2nd ever week at preschool (he's only doing 1 morning a week at the moment) but today was awful, he was hysterical as I tried to leave. It broke my heart to see him so distraught. He even cried with relief when I picked him up. I'm literally dreading next week so much that I might take him out of pre school until he turns 3 next year in the hope it makes a difference.

Any advice or experience would be good please

He doesn't need to go and well one morning each week seems bizarre a week is a long time to him.

I don’t think one morning a week will generally be enough to make a difference.

If you can wait til 3 I would but work on lots of groups where you can gradually move further away from him.

Take a break and try again later, but have him go more frequently next time. My DD was absolutely petrified of unfamiliar kids (she'd cry if they approached her in a playground and run away). Tried her at 2.5 and she just got more and more reluctant to go to nursery each time I dropped her off until eventually we wound up with tears. So she had a break and started a playgroup just after she turned three. Absolutely loved it. She goes 5 mornings a week and now says she likes playgroup better than being at home with DS and Nanny.

Is he neurodivergent?

@poppymaewrite No I don't think so

1 morning isn’t enough, I’d do two at least.

My kids preferred play school to nursery, so maybe have a look around for other settings.

It sounds counter intuitive but if you don’t want to pull him out I’d actually send him more often. One morning a week is a really bad idea - it’s not frequent enough for him to settle. He needs to be there often enough for it to be familiar, to get to know the adults there and learn to trust them and for him to be properly part of the group. I’m surprised they’re taking him on such an irregular basis - preschool my kids went to insisted on minimum of three sessions a week, preferably four or five.

Once a week leaves a huge gap between sessions. At two, I would either take him out and wait until nursery, or increase the number of sessions so that he has a chance to settle. His behaviour sounds totally normal to me.