Help! Online dating

[Emmas85]

Looking for some online dating advice please. I've been single for a while and have been signed up to a dating site for a while but no luck up until now.
I matched with a guy local to me, he seemed nice and we went from the site to chatting over text. We seemed to get on well and he said 'we should meet for a drink' I said that'd be nice but no secure plans were made. We have fallen into chatting daily, saying good morning etc over text but it's been 3 weeks now and we still haven't met. I have asked whether he still wants to meet and he says yes but again no plans. He told me first off that he's not after a one night stand and he wants a long term relationship, he's said this again since.

Things last night got heated and we started dirty texting. Im now worried there's no pulling it back as hell now think I'm happy to just have sex even though I've said I'm after more. Am I wasting my time? Have we left it too long to meet and it won't work? Advice please!

Honestly yes
Meet them quickly. So often they’re very different in person
One piece of advice I found helpful is never engage in sexting before you’ve met

Or you risk him thinking that’s all your offering ( although it’s your choice to only offer that of course ) rather than an actual relationship

Thank you for your reply. Unfortunately I think you're right.

What was the outcome from this? I've tried all the sites and ready to give up

I'd forgotten I'd posted this. So we eventually met, we got on well and he said he'd like to meet again. He txt that evening to say he had a nice time and we fell back into texting daily. It's been a week since our date and I've asked if he wants to meet again and when he's free and he's said yes but no arrangement. I'm so fed up as feel like I'm not getting anywhere but curiosity it's making me wonder if we'd work out! I know I should move on but it's so hard!

My advice would be to not ‘dirty’ text anyone that you have not actually met in person.

You could be texting a 13 year old boy and his mates or an 80 year old getting his kicks and anyone in between, including females.

Sorry, I didn’t see your update that you have now met.

There are lots of men who basically want a pen pal, some might meet you once to string you along a bit longer but they just want someone to talk to, someone to say good night to etc. they don't want to be bothered actually leaving the house or spending money. Some are in relationships and looking for some excitement on the side but I met a few who we're definitely single (it's not that hard to track them down and check) and just didn't want a real relationship.

I wouldn't talk for more than two weeks without meeting and then no more than another week after that without at least arranging a second date. Definitely no sex talk until you've met, partly because that's all some are after but also because it's really awkward to meet someone when you've had virtual sex with them already, if you hit it off it's not so bad but when you meet then and really don't fancy them it's very awkward.

He sounds like he's wasting your time, tell him what you want to happen and if it doesn't walk away.

Thanks 😊

I would knock this one on the head OP. If you've already met and he's not making an arrangement to meet again my guess is that he's got several conversations on the go and is keeping his options open - especially if you're ok to keep chatting (he's got nothing to lose).