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Original poster

Star of the day !?

29 replies

Mamamia344 · 01/10/2021 16:20

My son has been at school for a month now and I've seen every child come out as 'star of the day'. He was loving school but is becoming increasingly anxious as to why he hasn't had it.
I emailed the school asking what exactly star of the day is and what it is based on so I can explain to my son - as yet they haven't replied.
I really can't see any benefits for using this system. My son is gentle and mostly well behaved so I do not understand why he wouldn't get it.

OP posts:
Toddlerteaplease · 01/10/2021 16:27

They probably have a system so every child gets it once. It's just not been his turn yet

itsgettingwierd · 01/10/2021 16:28

Usually it's star of the week and each child gets a turn over the year.

Just remind him that if he's behaving and listening then he's being a star even if he doesn't get the badge/sticker.

Original poster
Mamamia344 · 01/10/2021 17:18

@Toddlerteaplease

They probably have a system so every child gets it once. It's just not been his turn yet
She replied saying it's awarded to a child who is focussed in their learning and generally following the classroom rules such as being kind, good listening on the carpet, etc.
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Original poster
Mamamia344 · 01/10/2021 17:20

@itsgettingwierd

Usually it's star of the week and each child gets a turn over the year.

Just remind him that if he's behaving and listening then he's being a star even if he doesn't get the badge/sticker.

It's definitely a daily thing - she replied saying it's awarded to a child for being focussed in their learning and generally following the classroom rules such as being kind, good listening on the carpet, etc.

I am sure he is these things..

I don't want him becoming disheartened. He's been loving school.

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FelicityPike · 01/10/2021 17:23

Ours is daily too and all the children get a turn.
The class are told it’s awarded for things like good listening, good sitting and stuff, but in P1 it was definitely just at random until they all had it.
The reward for being star of the day was they went first out the door.

AirEngland · 01/10/2021 17:28

I’m sure he’ll get it soon. If they’ve been at school for 4 full weeks than that’s only 20 days so presumably 1/3 of the class haven’t received one yet. And that’s assuming they started on day 1 or had days when they’re too busy/forget etc.

Luckystar1 · 01/10/2021 17:28

My DCs school have just started this too. It’s totally rubbish, but they get very excited about it. My child who has just started was ‘it’ one day this week, she was chosen at random by the previous days star (close their eyes and choose scenario).

My eldest was also star one day this week, again, he was chosen by a classmate.

They get to sit on a special cushion, be first in the line and get a compliments list that day. It seems sweet, but probably a pain in the behind for the teacher.

AirEngland · 01/10/2021 17:29

havent had days.

Minkribs · 01/10/2021 17:29

If he’s been at school for a month, that’s only 20 school days. If there are 30 in the class, chances are he’ll get it over the next fortnight.

Timetoretiretospain · 01/10/2021 17:32

I’m a primary teacher and I agree with you these reward strategies are awful . Your child will get it eventually. Don’t be afraid to ask again and say how it is affecting him.

HungryHippo11 · 01/10/2021 17:33

What's the point of its totally random? So a kid who has messed around all day and pushed someone over could win it, what sort of message does that send and where is the incentive for the other kids to aim for it

FuckingFlumps · 01/10/2021 17:36

Unless he's in a tiny class then as others have said there has not been enough days for everyone to have had a turn yet. It seems incredibly early in the day to email and complain.

Yogsgirl · 01/10/2021 17:41

Well if he's only been at school for four weeks not every child can have been star of the day, assuming there are 30 in the class- that's 10 that won't have been it yet!

MattHancocksSexTape · 01/10/2021 17:57

mostly well behaved

Maybe they are giving it to the children who are well behaved first?

Antinerak · 01/10/2021 17:58

It is often used to encourage children to focus when they are struggling to settle in to school. Sometime it's a great sign that he's settling in. Take their description of it with a pinch of salt. It will get round to him and they're only a month in!

Original poster
Mamamia344 · 01/10/2021 19:16

@FuckingFlumps

Unless he's in a tiny class then as others have said there has not been enough days for everyone to have had a turn yet. It seems incredibly early in the day to email and complain.
I didn't complain. I asked what is was as he was getting anxious about it.
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Original poster
Mamamia344 · 01/10/2021 19:18

@MattHancocksSexTape

mostly well behaved

Maybe they are giving it to the children who are well behaved first?

stop trolling, you know what I mean by mostly well behaved. I am not a deluded parent who believes their child is an angel all of the time.
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Original poster
Mamamia344 · 01/10/2021 19:20

@Antinerak

It is often used to encourage children to focus when they are struggling to settle in to school. Sometime it's a great sign that he's settling in. Take their description of it with a pinch of salt. It will get round to him and they're only a month in!
Thank you. I hope that's the case. He keeps saying, today I'll get it mum etc and coming home disappointed.
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User5827372728 · 01/10/2021 19:22

My kid got if for the week he wasn’t even in.!!

FuckingFlumps · 01/10/2021 19:25

I didn't complain. I asked what is was as he was getting anxious about it.

Surely you knew what it was it's hardly an unusual concept and your son would also be able to explain it to you. It does sort of come across as you complaing when you make sweeping statements like everyone else has had it which is obviously untrue.

WhatInTheBodenIsThis · 01/10/2021 20:13

My daughter used to get excited and then a bit disheartened when she wasn't given it, I'd just praise her at home and tell her that sometimes other children need a bit more support in doing or behaving in a way that comes easy to her such as sitting still in class, being quite and listening when the teacher talks, sharing resources etc.

If your son is getting anxious that he hasn't it yet I'd maybe do similar and try to not make a big deal of it, with my daughter I used to tell her to keep doing what she's doing and how proud we are etc.

Original poster
Mamamia344 · 01/10/2021 20:28

@User5827372728

My kid got if for the week he wasn’t even in.!!
lol!
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Original poster
Mamamia344 · 01/10/2021 20:33

@WhatInTheBodenIsThis

My daughter used to get excited and then a bit disheartened when she wasn't given it, I'd just praise her at home and tell her that sometimes other children need a bit more support in doing or behaving in a way that comes easy to her such as sitting still in class, being quite and listening when the teacher talks, sharing resources etc.

If your son is getting anxious that he hasn't it yet I'd maybe do similar and try to not make a big deal of it, with my daughter I used to tell her to keep doing what she's doing and how proud we are etc.

That's a great approach :)
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Original poster
Mamamia344 · 01/10/2021 20:35

@Timetoretiretospain

I’m a primary teacher and I agree with you these reward strategies are awful . Your child will get it eventually. Don’t be afraid to ask again and say how it is affecting him.
Thanks for responding. I'm glad you understand where I'm coming from on this.
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Original poster
Mamamia344 · 01/10/2021 20:38

@Luckystar1

My DCs school have just started this too. It’s totally rubbish, but they get very excited about it. My child who has just started was ‘it’ one day this week, she was chosen at random by the previous days star (close their eyes and choose scenario).

My eldest was also star one day this week, again, he was chosen by a classmate.

They get to sit on a special cushion, be first in the line and get a compliments list that day. It seems sweet, but probably a pain in the behind for the teacher.

This actually sounds a bit nicer, to be chosen by another pupil and to be on a compliments list. Maybe I'm overly sensitive about all of this and it's not affecting him as much as I think it is. I just don't like seeing his spirit crushed every day when I pick him up.
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