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Original poster

Would you throw your own birthday party at a restaurant?

10 replies

MarineBlue33 · 28/09/2021 12:38

I always think bdays are special, and as they were not celebrated much in my house as a child, I make a fuss of them, even with adults.

Last year, I was really disappointed as people generally forgot mine. It wasn't a big number but I had gone to great efforts to organise other people's parties/ events.

Anyway, DH said, why not organise my own this year. There is a nice restaurant nearby and I could invite people as a get together/ my birthday. I can't afford to pay for everyone but I know it is a restaurant everyone likes. I am sure people will not mind paying for themselves at all.

However I am not sure of the way to go about doing this if at all.
Others have organised things for other people but as no one has organised anything for me (I know cos it's not far away), is it bad form to organise one for myself?
I don't mind if people don't bring gifts or anything but just come and celebrate with me. I am only thinking 10-15 people.
Would you do it and if so, how would you word it? If not what would you do?
(I have name changed for this).

OP posts:

chipsandpeas · 28/09/2021 12:44

you will need to make it clear to people you arent paying just incase they assume you are paying

TedMullins · 28/09/2021 12:52

I’ve only ever organised things for myself (and my friends organise their own birthday gatherings) so it seems weird to me that you’re worrying about this. Just invite people to the restaurant for a birthday meal. If I was invited to such an event I would expect to pay for myself.

SylvanasWindrunner · 28/09/2021 12:56

I'd just say that I was going to X restaurant for my birthday and would love friends to join me. I'd then say you can find the menu and pricing on their website here, or something and to let me know if they'd like to join me,

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Events & celebrations

SylvanasWindrunner · 28/09/2021 12:57

Also I wouldn't fret about it - this is entirely standard birthday protocol among my friends! We all pay for ourselves but the birthday person generally chooses the day/restaurant.

Original poster

MarineBlue33 · 28/09/2021 12:59

@TedMullins Thank you. It's because in my circle, friends have always organised it for each other. I may not be so friendly with anyone in particular but still friends enough.

OP posts:

Hoppinggreen · 28/09/2021 13:01

I did it for my 40th.
I arranged a set menu and told everyone up front that it was £x per person and I would buy the first round of drinks

TheLovelinessOfDemons · 28/09/2021 13:03

@MarineBlue33

I always think bdays are special, and as they were not celebrated much in my house as a child, I make a fuss of them, even with adults.

Last year, I was really disappointed as people generally forgot mine. It wasn't a big number but I had gone to great efforts to organise other people's parties/ events.

My family do this. It's just "I'm going to such and such for my birthday if you'd like to come."

ComtesseDeSpair · 28/09/2021 13:08

I thought most people did this. Virtually all of my friends do, anyway - it’s incredibly rare that anyone will specifically organise a birthday party for somebody else unless it’s their partner.

Original poster

MarineBlue33 · 28/09/2021 13:16

Ok, you are all making me feel much better. It's unusual for me because in my circle, no one does this except for a big birthday when it would be their partner doing it.
I like the idea @Hoppinggreen has of me buying the first round of drinks.

OP posts:

Summerbreeze4 · 28/09/2021 14:07

I always have to do this, as a single Mum, no-one organises anything for me. I just txt and say would you like to come out for my birthday next Friday etc. ....Ok I'll book so and so at 8pm, then confirm. Everyone knows they pay for themselves, it's better than missing out.

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