questions about childbirth

[Sally202021]

Hi for those of you who have given birth-
Im just wondering how much preparation did you do prior to giving birth and what impact did the preparation have on the birth?

Many Thanks in advance.

@Sally202021 Had my 1st last year. I did an online Hypnobirthing course. Can’t say I was entirely onboard with it all (the positive affirmations and scripts etc were far too OTT for me) but it gave me a clearer idea of what my body had to go through in order to reach the point of delivery and it was clear on what pain relief choices there were and how each of them work in the body/any side effects they have. I’d say it also gave me the confidence to be a bit more assertive in my choices than I might have been otherwise as I felt that I had more of an idea what was going on.
I also did plenty of research into pain relief etc independently of the course.

I had an induction and from 1st pessary (has 3 overall) until I was about half way through the active stage of labour I had a lot of older, quite pushy midwives looking after me. Most of this time I was alone due to covid restrictions so had nobody else there to advocate for me. I was being told that I “HAD to have an epidural” before I was allowed the hormone drip to progress my induction as it was far too painful without one etc. I wasn’t particularly against any form of pain relief but I was coping well at that point and wanted to continue doing what I was doing. Had I not done my own research and known my own options I probably would have went along with what the midwife wanted even though I wasn’t entirely comfortable with it.

I’m not sure that any preparation made any difference to the actual process of labour and delivery but it definitely made me feel more mentally prepared.

Birth is in phases. First phase is contractions to open your cervix. Then transition when your body switches to pushing out the baby. Then pushing out placenta.

I think birth prep only really helps you deal with the first bit, for transition and pushing you're in the thick of it.

Know what might happen outside your ideal scenario - c section, forceps etc.

It's easy to focus on birth way too much, forgetting that then you're straight into caring for a newborn! Don't forget to learn a bit about babies too.

I read a fair few pregnancy books.
Used the secret saviors stretch mark band.
Went to the free antenatal classes.
Hypnobirthing course.
Pregnancy yoga.
La Leche League class.
Pelvic floor exercises.
Practiced using an aniball
Ate dates.
Spinning babies exercises.
Wrote a birth plan.

I had a good experience with a water birth & used gas & air. I had a quick labour despite refusing induction. 2 minor grazes.

My mum had a horrible long birth experience which ended in an episiotomy & an instrumental birth.

Not sure if any of the things I did contributed to me having a good experience but I'm a planner and wanted to at least try.

I read the NICE guidelines for a elective C-section which was handy

Not a lot. I never went to antenatal classes or anything. I probably read a lot on the internet. I think my preparation both times only went as far as packing a hospital bag. I packed way less the second time as I needed only about 10% of what I took the first time. Oh, and I fannied about on/with a birthing ball as labour drew close with the second as I was scared of having another drawn out back-to-back labour (whether it was the ball or something else, I don't know, but she was born within 3 hours and came out the typical way round!).

Well a fair bit like a birthing plan and hypno birthing. But the plan went out the window, hypo saved me. Anything you do, you have to just realise that however much prep you do, thing don't always go to plan, so they best one is to just be flexible.

It depends what you mean exactly?
I did NCT and lots of general reading up on newborn care etc. When you actually have your baby though it all falls out of your head and you just google everything as i at least didn't trust my memory. Nct was a huge waste of money i really dont recommend it.
For the birth itself my birth plan was simply the word EPIDURAL and im so glad i could have one as the pain is insane and i couldn't have focussed on pushing dd out without it.
So many different things can happen with your birth its so hard to plan tbh.
I packed loads of things that never got used, such as flipflops (never showered in the end as was physically incapable) and snacks (felt horrifically sick during and for a long time after labour so couldn't eat a thing).

Lots and no impact whatsoever.

I had complicated births with my first two though, neither went to plan.

I did hypnobirthing and would recommend learning some of the breathing stuff but rejecting the misogynist bollocks many classes peddle around physiological birth. I found the unspoken implications of the classes we attended were that 1) you need to go in expecting to meet resistance from birth professionals as they will try to coerce you into unnecessary interventions and 2)using drugs to relieve pain, or tearing, or needing an episiotomy, or forceps, or c-section can all be avoided if you do enough breathing, and denote failure as a woman.

In real life 1) every midwife/doctor I saw in labour was fucking awesome and 2) however you give birth you are fucking awesome.

I’d second the comments saying be flexible and don’t try to plan too rigidly, and to spend more time preparing for life with a newborn (freeze meals you can eat with one hand, find contact details for local breastfeeding groups/peer support workers/lactation consultants)

I went to antenatal classes which I found really good. I had a plan that I would see how I got on before deciding if I wanted any drugs to help with the pain. I was at home for most of my labor I woke up at 8.30am with contractions but they weren't that bad. My mucus plug came out and I decided to go to hospital then.

That was at 2pm I left got seen too at 3pm at 3.15 my waters broke and told I was 10cm so time to push I didn't know when I had to push I asked the doctor how do you know he said you feel like you need to go toilet.
I was feeling like that for ages 😂 My D's took awhile to come out his head would be out then go back in again 🤦🏼‍♀️ he was born at 4.40pm. I had no stitches thank god was home the next day.

On my DD I woke at 5.15am but by 6am I felt like I needed to push but my waters didn't break yet. There was a stage I was going to call an ambulance but could barely walk as legs felt so heavy. Tmi I was in the bathroom getting sick into the sink and diarrhoea in the toilet think it was my body getting ready for labour. Got to the hospital at 7am my DD was born at 7.14am.

I told my husband call the nurse the head is out the nurse came in and was like let's have a look oh so it is 😂 I pushed and she was out the waters came after her. I went home the same day. You know your body just relax and listen to the nurses if need pain relief take it.

I found doing different positions and breathing during my contractions helped. I couldn't stay in the bed they felt worse for me. I also love music had music on while in labour.

I read everything I could get my hands on and a lot of hugely helpful stories on here - but I never went into labour. I was told I would be induced on X day but thanks to the wonderful advice from this site that had pointed me to relevant research (that made me aware that for my circumstances as an older first time mother this would likely lead to a cascade of medical intervention which I did not want, and carried risks for the baby and for my body that I did not like the sound of) I was aware that I was allowed to say no, and that I wanted to go straight to a scheduled C section.

I had to argue for it, but knowing what I had learned from here, that it was in the NICE guidelines to allow the request, meant I was able to stay strong and do so, (even when they brought in the big-gun consultant, who was actually quite nice) and I had an amazing, calm, pain free birth and very quick recovery. I will always be grateful to all the amazing women on this site who helped me to have a safe birth and a healthy baby, without ever even knowing how powerful their words were.

I had zero prep other than mums net and all went smoothly. There was a minor complication but midwives were on hand to sort out and nothing I could have done to of prevented it.

Sorry, I did do my own research on pain relief but that was the only thing I really looked into regarding childbirth itself.

I think it's good to know about the different pain relief methods etc and things that could happen but i don't think you have much control over what actually happens.

Midwife here, and for the vast majority, preparation is so important. Really recommend looking at hypnobirth, look into how labour works, what happens to your body, coping mechanisms, make a tool box that will help you get through your labour, especially early labour which can really throw people

Antenatal classes a waste of time, just listen to your own body and instinct. I think raspberry leaf capsules definately helped me, had loads with my first and although induced as late took three and a half hours start to finish. Next two wasn't as good at remembering to take them probably due to looking after little ones and took 4 and 6 hours respectively. They are supposed to tone your womb for efficient labour.

The usual prep eg nct courses, read, researched.

Once the body is in labour you personally don't do anything. The body takes over the process like when you have no 2.
It knows what to do to expel the baby and just like a no 2 you can't do much if it's too large to pass easily. You can't help this nor stop it.

You can be calm or panicking but that won't change the size of your babies head and your birth canal.

That's where the absolute wonder of modern medicine and intervention steps in so save life and it's nothing to be afraid of.

One labour 6 hours established no tear. Text book.

One elc.. Elc was much better.

• remember your birth plan is a placebo mostly, an epidural is not really a pain relief option because it needs a trained anethisit to do it and they are often not available, also mw might put you off doing it until its too late anyway m

I did a hypnobirth course, with breathing exercises & songs, plus a little other reading.

In some ways I felt it helped me, in that I knew what to expect, I wasn’t frightened etc. But in other more practical ways I’m not sure if it helped me.
I was quite calm, making graphs of where I thought I was up to in the various stages. DH was there, he was told to go home as “nothing will happen till mid morning tomorrow”. No one was taking much notice of me.
But I told him to stay, as I felt things would happen imminently.

Baby was born just a few minutes after midnight, with the trainee midwife who was the only one around, wildly flicking through her notes.
But all was well, for me & baby, thank heavens!

I had good births for baby number 1 and 2 but for my 3rd I swam ever other day snd swam for a mile the day before a gave birth. I think this really helped my labour. It was only 2 hours long, hardly hurt and really felt special. My midwife had the radio on in the background and I arrived at the hospital about an hour before giving birth as I arrived really late for my second DC so wanted to avoid that. The birth was stress free and felt almost spiritual.

Haha, same! And every maternal request thread on here I could find.