Shit, I’ve got to go to a football match!

[BumfuzzledMum]

And I really don’t want to go.

Never been to one in all my 50 years. Can anyone tell me what it’s like, do you have to queue for ages to get in and out?

Should I strip and try to run across the field to relieve the boredom?

Agree you should try and swap the names and if worst comes to worst I’m sure they wouldn’t check.

I’m married to a huge football fan and while it’s not my first choice of an evening out (tbh I’ve dragged him to plenty of gigs which hed say the same for!) there’s something to be said for the atmosphere. If you do wind up having to go I’d embrace it, it can be good fun

Also with the drive is there any chance of making a weekend of it and staying over? That way hopefully DS and DH can go to the game and you can have a few hours to yourself - perfect!

Cold, boring, foul language, awful food, drunk men, aggressive shouting, crowds
I’m sure you will have a lovely time

Some grounds are making a big deal of checking id this season because of covid. I had my id checked at the game I went to last night.
Definitely contact supporters services and explain - I’m guessing your son actually wants to go unlike you ?
@IamaBluebird good grief those away seats 😬

Being serious for a second, please report any instance of anti-semitic comments or chanting if it takes place. I really hope not, but Tottenham are identified as having a largely Jewish fan base by some (not the case) and there have been some nasty chants and comments directed at them in the past.

My brother persuaded me to go to a match with him, claiming it was great fun and I would love it.

It started out quite pleasantly with all the boys playing with footballs, but that turned out to only be the warm up, and someone took all the balls away except one, which they then had to fight over.

With only one ball and everyone trying to take it away from whoever had it there was a lot of running about and stuff happening that didn't hold my attention.

Luckily (and I strongly recommend that you do the same) I had a very good audiobook on my phone, and once I had my earphones in the rude howling of the surrounding mob at our end of the pitch when one of them did something that met with either approval or disapproval became a lot less bothersome.

The match was held in the evening, and it grew quite chilly, clouds rolled across the sky and I realised that there was no roof and I was going to get wet if it started to rain, but to my great relief the game ended, and I thought we'd soon be back in the comfy car, heading home.

Hah! Turns out that what I thought was the end was actually only half time and there was another interminable 45 minutes to get through after the break. This was when my brother realised that I'd been listening to a book, and expressed his displeasure that I "wasn't even giving it a chance". In response I expressed my even deeper displeasure that he had been insensitive enough to trick me into participating in such a cold, boring and uncomfortable ritual, and that the players weren't even being nice to each other.

Without that audiobook I would never have survived the second half, which was even more boring than the first 45 minutes, and a lot colder.

So, my advice, if you really can't get out of going, is to dress warmly, and in water proof outer wear, avoid drinking much in the way of liquids and pee before you go so you don't have to queue for the nasty bogs, and in the name of all that is holy, take a good book with you, or your favourite music, or something to keep your soul inside your body for the duration.

I've been to a few games and enjoyed it. The atmosphere is great and everyone is there for the same thing. If you think you will be bored take some headphones with a book on your phone x

Everyone saying to the op take a book etc how would you feel if your companion to the theatre/ cinema / opera / whatever whipped out their book