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Original poster

Does your OH take the kids out?

50 replies

FlattenedOut · 27/09/2021 15:51

Hi all

Having a bad day, all I wanted was for my OH to take our very mischievous toddler out for an hour or so just so I could get shit done around the house in peace!

Little one was bored and could have done with an outing even something as standard as a local walk. OH is free, not at work during the day. It would have let me batter through the housework and cooking a lot more easily if I didn’t have an interrupting toddler who wanted to come in and empty the kitchen cupboards and poke around in every little thing that doesn’t concern her.

So we got into it me and OH, tensions were high and I lost my tether with him. We exchange some impolite words. His stance was basically “I’ll take her out when I feel like it” kind of thing - so basically never. He doesn’t think he’s wrong in letting her whinge at home when he could make life easier for me and get her outdoors.

For anyone that asks why didn’t I take her out and let him do the house chores, I’m heavily pregnant and unable to. I’m not very mobile at the minute and due any day now. Also, I’m the one who does the cooking, OH isn’t the best at it.

So do your OHs take the kids out to allow you to crack on with house stuff?

OP posts:

Camomila · 27/09/2021 18:21

Yes, he does, at least once every week (DS2 is his supermarket shopping buddy).

MintJulia · 27/09/2021 18:35

No. His view was that he shouldn't have to do childcare.

That's why he's an ex.

flower11 · 27/09/2021 19:20

I work every other weekend Dh takes the children out while I'm at work. I have had this working pattern since dd was 9 months old she is now 8.

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Cheesewiz · 27/09/2021 19:27

Nope, they are 7 and 8 and I think the only place he has ever taken them is his own is brothers house.

Original poster

FlattenedOut · 27/09/2021 20:26

I sympathise with those of you who are in the same boat as me, he ended up taking her to the shops for a stroll earlier on but it was during the afternoon when I could’ve really done without the interference of a mischievous and bored toddler.

OP posts:

HarrisMcCoo · 27/09/2021 20:49

Grudgingly he does. I would have to initiate it though, he wouldn't think off his own back to give me a break.

Jellycatspyjamas · 27/09/2021 21:01

Yes, he takes them out at the weekend so I can work in peace, goes swimming, to the park, for a walk, to the beach etc etc. He likes spending time with them and knows I need my own space to clean, read a book, have a bath etc. I couldn’t be with someone who didn’t want to spend time with his kids and who didn’t consider my needs.

isitweds9thseptyet · 27/09/2021 21:13

Ex DH rarely did. I used to have to hide in my bedroom if i needed a break. DP happily takes them out even though they aren't his and he has two of his own. He is just happy to do whats best for them and cares enough about me to want to keep me sane.

Katieandthekids · 27/09/2021 21:22

My husband is always taking them out... I often just sit and watch tv/ have a nap. I do the same for him and then we also all go out as a family... but Daddy time with his girls is precious and good for the girls too!

33goingon64 · 27/09/2021 21:45

DH doesn't do this as often as I'd like but in his defence he works full time and I don't (both DC at school and I get a fair amount of me time, coffee with friends, yoga etc) while he's at work. He rarely takes them out on his own. However if he didn't work during day, or if we had a toddler I'd be expecting it more.

gemloving · 27/09/2021 21:55

Yes. All the time. We have two 2 3/4 years and 5 months old.

Especially weekends though as he does work in the week.

StartingAgain6369 · 27/09/2021 22:09

Yes, I did all the time, park, swimming anything, even went to toddlers in the local village hall

Tell him they are only young once and you will never get that time back again to be with them

You are also making memories for your child

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 27/09/2021 22:15

Yes- my husband takes the children out (4 and 10months)- not that often both of them- but when we just had one he’d take her out for the day, the park, a friends party, soft play etc- no reason why he couldn’t !

user1471538283 · 28/09/2021 07:59

My ex never did anything at all. My DF used to take me places alot at all ages even when I was an adult. It's about parenting and wanting to spend time with your children. My DM never did anything with me. I was in kindergarten all day from the age of two and she didnt even work.

When your children are older no doubt he will wonder why he has such a shit relationship with them.

PineNutsAreOverpriced · 28/09/2021 08:13

He doesn’t just take them out so I can do things or to ‘help’, he sometimes takes them because he wants to and likes spending time with them - particularly getting the chance to do 1-1 stuff as we have a few.

Toodlydoo · 28/09/2021 08:17

Yup everyday for varying lengths of time, even if it’s to nip to the shops for milk. More than me tbh (I don’t drive and live in a country where they don’t seem to think they need pavements 🙄).

timeisnotaline · 28/09/2021 08:19

Yes he does, all the time. He’s probably better at getting out the door with them than I am tbh.

AgnesPerdita · 28/09/2021 08:25

Mine does although he can occasionally need prompting. But that's because my DD is very much a mummy's girl at the moment so if I am there she wants me and only me!

However we both work full time with me doing odd and unsociable hours including weekends so he is very aware of the need to get some energy out!

TheGrumpyGoat · 28/09/2021 08:27

Yes he takes all 3 of ours (including a toddler) out all the time. Sometimes to leave me in peace but often just because he wants to and enjoys their company.

JasonMomoasgirlfriend · 28/09/2021 08:28

Yep, loads

Your husband is a knob

ImFree2doasiwant · 28/09/2021 08:29

No, and this is why I am single. It was a revelation last night to me (sad i know) when I and sone other mums, dropped our DC at an activity and went for a drink. I took younger dc with me. 1 left her toddler abd baby at hone with her husband, who was putting them to bed. Another had her toddler and baby with her, but called partner to collect toddler as he was tired and needed to go to bed. All just dobecwith no morning or stress/anxiety on the mums part. How it should be.

bubblebath62636 · 28/09/2021 08:30

God what a selfish idiot op!

I'm off swimming today because I fancy it (alone) and it's DH day off. I'll probably pop into town too. DH loves spending time with our baby.

Go out for a few hours and leave him to it op.

DGFB · 28/09/2021 08:30

Yes of course he does! Because he’s a bloody parent.. your DH sounds awful, sorry

TheOneWithTwoParties · 28/09/2021 08:34

Yep, all the time. Always has done from when our first was a tiny baby who would only nap in the pram. He'd go and push that pram round and round the park in all weathers so I got a break.

Now they are older he takes them on full days out and sometimes even away for a few days.

TheGrumpyGoat · 28/09/2021 08:50

@TheOneWithTwoParties

Yep, all the time. Always has done from when our first was a tiny baby who would only nap in the pram. He'd go and push that pram round and round the park in all weathers so I got a break.

Now they are older he takes them on full days out and sometimes even away for a few days.

Our first was an awful sleeper and used to get up for the day at 4.30am. DH used to wrap her up and walk her round the streets in her pram for a couple of hours so that she’d doze back off and I had a couple of hours uninterrupted sleep!

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