Why is this woman moved to sit opposite me on the train

[EvilRingahBitch]

Am on train with DS who is an adult sized long-legged teen.

DS and I got on at station 1. No double seats available so we took the two aisle seats on a table, sitting next to a young couple who were deliberately sitting opposite each other in order to hog the table (slightly bad form).

On the table on the other side were another couple also deploying strategic use of bags and placement to hog the table.

At station 2 the couple got off leaving DS and I in command of the table. However lots of other people were getting on, so I decided to do the right thing and get DS to come and sit next to me, facing forward.

A newcomer joined us, facing backwards.

Couple on other table also made room for a newcomer, facing backwards - a lone middle aged woman.

At station 3 our newcomer left and so did the couple on the other side, leaving us in command of our table and the lone woman in command of the opposite table.

WHEREUPON SHE MOVED OVER TO OUR TABLE! Leaving other table empty, which it has remained ever since. Sitting in the aisle seat opposite DS so they have to battle it out for legroom.

I don't mind, I'm not aggrieved, I don't think she's a CF. But for the love of God why would you do this? Why would you leave an empty table to share one with us?

It's a quiet well-behaved carriage so she's not seeking safety in numbers from Millwall fans.

She's moved from one rear facing seat to another.

She has not shown any desire whatsoever to chat.

I personally think DS is the most beautiful young man in the world but she could equally well have gazed at him from her original seat.

May I throw it open to the MN hive mind? Why would anyone do such a thing?

Is this proper etiquette I've missed in 30 years of train travel (admittedly rarely as just an adult couple, went from child to by myself to with children).

You were sitting in Her Spot. Or its her lucky number. She had a premonition.

Or she was trying not to be rude sitting at a 4 seat table alone.

I would have thought it strange but here are a few reasons here that make sense.

However I'm genuinely interested to know why you think its polite to sit next to the person you know than opposite? Surely everyone given a chance would rather be looking at the person they are talking to not a stranger. It's much more awkward the other way.

It's much better to sit opposite each other at a table.

But yes, weird to abandon a table to yourself to sit with you guys.

Isn't it actually good form to sit opposite each other at the table? That way you don't have the whole accidental footsie thing with strangers' legs.

No idea why the woman sat at your table though. It's like people who plonk themselves down next to you on an empty beach.

Not the point of your thread but it is far more normal to sit opposite your companion on a train than next to them if you're at a table. How are you supposed to talk properly sitting next to each other. YABU

I'm obviously working on different assumptions to everyone else on seat/table etiquette! How odd. I hate sitting next to strangers on the train because there's so little shoulder room and you need to reach over them (or VV) to get to the charger.

Am I alone in this then?

My dd once went and sat at a long bar table with benches in a cafe window and was quite happily people watching out the window. Almost empty cafe, she was only person sat at the long window tables of which there were identical in the other front window.
A woman got her coffee and walked to the end of dds table and proceeded shuffle herself along the opposite bench (so facing in, with back to the window) and stopped directly in front of dd who instead of looking out the window was now looking directly at this woman who didn't speak or acknowledge dd at all, just looked at her as if to say 'what you looking at'
Dd is quite fiesty and said 'You're having a laugh right?' and got up and moved to identical seat on other side of cafe. Woman just carried on as if nothing had happened and drank her coffee.
People are fecking weird.

Yeah, that's weird, or it certainly is where I live. The carriage is quiet and she was already near you anyway.

I think I think that sitting opposite each other is poor form on a half full train because it gives off clear "fuck off and don't sit at our table" vibes. Especially when combined with deployment of rucksacks of course.

But I will defer to the majority opinion.

@Noeuf

I am confused by the poor form shown in sitting opposite each other on a table?! Dd and I do this so we can chat.

Me and partner do this so can both stretch legs out and only kick each other

But now in COVID times, it's probably best /safest to sit next to each other with strangers across the table.

@Haffdonga

Isn't it actually good form to sit opposite each other at the table? That way you don't have the whole accidental footsie thing with strangers' legs.

No idea why the woman sat at your table though. It's like people who plonk themselves down next to you on an empty beach.

Or accidental eye contact! Aiiee!

I prefer to sit in airline style seats if I'm on my own on a train journey, for this reason.

I sometimes wondered why when taking the bus a young woman would sit next to me rather than in an empty double seat. Then I realised that if she took an empty double, when the bus fills up she would have no control over who she's sat next to.

Maybe it's something like that? She knows someone will get on the next stop and in all likelihood sit with her. You two seem normal so she's taking the decision to sit with you now before the choice gets taken from her.

I much prefer sitting opposite too and always do! Not sharing legroom with a stranger and can see the person I'm chatting to. Don't have to look at stranger sitting next to me whereas if they're opposite me I don't know where to look (well, my phone 😆)

It is a bit odd that she moved though but she'll have had her reasons.

Hang on, I'll ask her.

Maybe she's incontinent and has wet the seat.

deliberately sitting opposite each other in order to hog the table (slightly bad form)

no it isn't "bad form" dont be ridiculous. Iti is entirely up to them where they sit, and it could be in that configuration for any number of reasons

And as to your "strategic use of bags" comment - people should be spacing themselves out if they can

And the woman can sit wherever she want, as well.

You must have a very dull life if you are reduced to sarky comments about where people sit on trains!

Yeah I always thought sitting opposite each other if you’re together on a table is better for all. Not table hogging, but the opposite. I’d consider people sitting side by side to be the table hoggers. Who wants shared leg space with a stranger?

But this woman sounds odd. I’d move to the now empty table.

But now in COVID times, it's probably best /safest to sit next to each other with strangers across the table.

If you’re a sitting round a small table in a train carriage, it probably doesn’t make much difference. And even if it did, opposite wouldn’t help because face to face as opposed to side to side is worse isn’t it?

Omg no.

One of the most annoying things that has ever happened to me was when DH and I went for a coffee (was before we were married so we were young and quiet, keep ourselves to ourselves types). It was about 11am on a Sunday morning in the city centre, went into a place we really liked and we were the only two in there.

Couldn’t believe our luck. We sat on the sofas at the window, across from each other (two sofas facing each other, table in the middle).

About halfway through our coffee a middle aged couple came in. Ordered a bottle of Prosecco and plonked themselves down beside us. Literally not another soul in the place. Poured their Prosecco and spoke to each other in loud voices. We got up and left.

It was years ago but I still look back on it with sheer rage. Rage with them for being a pair of utter bullies. Rage with myself and DH for not being like fuck all the way off

But you're breathing towards the stranger if opposite each other so not sure that's better than next to them unless the table is very big?

@EvilRingahBitch

I think I think that sitting opposite each other is poor form on a half full train because it gives off clear "fuck off and don't sit at our table" vibes. Especially when combined with deployment of rucksacks of course.

But I will defer to the majority opinion.

well, you are wrong, it isnt

@Noeuf

I am confused by the poor form shown in sitting opposite each other on a table?! Dd and I do this so we can chat.

Us too! Far more social then sitting next to each other.

@SickAndTiredAgain

But now in COVID times, it's probably best /safest to sit next to each other with strangers across the table.

If you’re a sitting round a small table in a train carriage, it probably doesn’t make much difference. And even if it did, opposite wouldn’t help because face to face as opposed to side to side is worse isn’t it?

I sssume we'd all be masked up if sat around a table On the train.

I'd not be speaking to the person opposite me if partner was next to me, just murmuring quietly if needed.

@StellaCinnamon

Omg no.

One of the most annoying things that has ever happened to me was when DH and I went for a coffee (was before we were married so we were young and quiet, keep ourselves to ourselves types). It was about 11am on a Sunday morning in the city centre, went into a place we really liked and we were the only two in there.

Couldn’t believe our luck. We sat on the sofas at the window, across from each other (two sofas facing each other, table in the middle).

About halfway through our coffee a middle aged couple came in. Ordered a bottle of Prosecco and plonked themselves down beside us. Literally not another soul in the place. Poured their Prosecco and spoke to each other in loud voices. We got up and left.

It was years ago but I still look back on it with sheer rage. Rage with them for being a pair of utter bullies. Rage with myself and DH for not being like fuck all the way off

You should have farted really loudly….and hopefully the smell would have driven them off. 😂

murmuring quietly if needed. 😂😂😂😂