Massages when you’re over weight

[PinotAndPlaydough]

Ok, I need some advice from people in the know. I’ve been given a voucher for a local spa. I would LOVE a back massage but I’m very over weight. I’m worried that 1. It’s just going to be gross for the person doing the massage and 2. That they’ll use those fold up flimsy tables and it’ll collapse half way through (my worst nightmare).

I’ve never been for a professional massage before, for people that do have them what are the tables like and for people that give them would you be really put off by a fat back?! Would it be weird to give the place a call and ask about the tables?

The woman that comes to my house from Urban has a table that holds up to 120 kg

It's not weird to call and ask about the tables. Or email them if you're too shy.

I feel the same about massages. It's a shame because Id love to be pampered and care about myself but I feel I'm too fat to deserve it.

Oh I’ve just been for a massage today BMI 33 and I would say the masseuse was a bigger lady than me! You’ll be fine. This was a high end spa too!

I think it's sensible to phone ahead and just have a chat. You'll be able to get a feel for the place as well.
If they are warm, reassuring and welcoming then you know it will be lovely. If they are standoffish and rude and sound fatphobic, you know to avoid something that will make you feel vulnerable.

I'm on my weight loss journey and wanted to try yoga and emailed three different places and judged the responses. Two were so nice they almost made me cry!

I really think that masseuses/beauty therapists have seen it all. I understand why you're worried, but please don't let it stand in your way.

One "entry" to massage could be to use the voucher for a head, neck and shoulder massage, which could be done in a chair if you prefer, to gauge your comfort level and the approach of the salon. Enjoy!

They really don't find fat bodies gross. I am overweight and have massages every week for chronic pain. Everyone I've seen has been supremely unbothered by my fat back. One guy I saw for a couple of years, said he just sees problems that need fixing, that all bodies look pretty much the same for him.

Why are fat bodies gross?
I think they would only feel grossed out if someone didn’t show up clean/ showered for a masssage appointment (which is just common decency in my opinion).

If you’re worried about the scales just call them and ask. I doubt you’d be the only person who has asked them this.

Honestly don't worry.
I go regularly for massages and have great rapport with my lovely therapist and I've actually asked her about this in the past!
She says she's genuinely unbothered by size/shape, but honestly only finds it unpleasant if someone is not clean. This is more common apparently than you'd think?!
I'm overweight, but embarrass easily and must confess, I've given the table a bit of a press before just to make sure (yes, it's safe!) They look flimsy but are designed to weight bear.
I really hope you go and enjoy a lovely massage.

Not quite the same but I have a friend who's a doctor and she said that when she examines people she's too busy translating their body into the diagrams in her head to actually pay attention to or judge what they look like. I suspect it's very similar for a masseuse who would be too busy identifying exactly where muscles are and where to press to really pay attention to what you look like.

As for the table, I've never known one to fail. I'm not a small person and for my last massage (thai) the table held me and the masseuse very easily.

My massage therapist told me that he much prefers bigger patients/clients as it is easier to work them as he can leverage their own body weight. (I am skinny so he wasn't trying to be nice)
You pay money, they will be delighted to have you

As a therapist told me, it’s all just flesh to them.

I do a different kind of massage, on a futon on the floor, so I don't know about the tables, but certainly a) if you phoned me and said what you've said on your OP, my intent in my response would be to reassure you, and b) human bodies are fascinating to work on, and all different. Everybody has things they're insecure about, but from the practitioner's point of view, if we can send you away feeling better than you did when you arrived... job done!

I think PP's suggestion of phoning or emailing first is a good idea, to get a feel for whether they're lovely or not, and to get your question about the tables answered. Don't they treat massive rugby players on them though? They weigh about 4 tons.

Many years ago I was a beauty therapist. I've done thousands of massages and never once thought negatively about the size of my client.

Please don't worry, no therapist worth their stripes would make you feel uncomfortable.

Enjoy your massage.

My dd is a trainee beauty therapist and works in a spa at the weekend doing massages. Her table holds up to 125 kg and she's just glad she can help you feel relaxed and pampered. I'm very overweight and she's always trying to pamper me!

We talked about it once and she reckons if you look after yourself with things like massages you'll feel better about yourself and want to take care of yourself more, including losing weight.

I've given hundreds of massages to people of all shapes and sizes, what they look like never crossed my mind! Life is too short to not go for things because you are worried what people will think, honestly.

The only thing I've ever noticed is hygiene, e.g very smelly armpits, so just make sure you are clean and you are good to go :)

Fat bodies aren't gross.

@LaurieFairyCake

The woman that comes to my house from Urban has a table that holds up to 120 kg

That's about 19 stone so quite feasible that someone who is overweight wouldn't be safe on that

@Neonplant I know, it’s totally my issue and something I know I need to work on. I don’t actually look at other overweight people and things “urgh your disgusting” just myself!

Thanks for all your replies, I really want this massage, it was a lovely thoughtful gift and I’ve had the worst 3 months of my life so I think I need and deserve something nice. I’m going to email and see what they say.

Enjoy OP!

[quote PinotAndPlaydough]@Neonplant I know, it’s totally my issue and something I know I need to work on. I don’t actually look at other overweight people and things “urgh your disgusting” just myself!

Thanks for all your replies, I really want this massage, it was a lovely thoughtful gift and I’ve had the worst 3 months of my life so I think I need and deserve something nice. I’m going to email and see what they say.[/quote]
Sorry that was probably harsh. I was having a low day yesterday. Sorry. I just think negative self talk does impact on others too.

I actually love massage and treatments. I'm fat, actually just had bariatric surgery so hopefully I'll not be as fat for much longer! I have massages a lot and rarely think about my size. But if you are worried about the bed do ask. As you'll not relax worrying about the bed collapsong, which it totally won't!

TFW you realise you are heavier than the maximum weight of the table
That said I've had plenty of massages and never given it a thought.

@TakemedowntoPotatoCity

TFW you realise you are heavier than the maximum weight of the table That said I've had plenty of massages and never given it a thought.

I hear ya! Fortunately I have ASD and hate being touched by anyone so massage wasn't on my bucket list

Those tables are a good bit sturdier than they look.

My back gets ridiculously tight and a couple of times my therapist has actually knelt on the table for leverage/better angle. Now I weigh about 15 stone and he boxes so he isn't exactly light and even under our combined weight we have never had a table incident.

I’m really overweight and had some good massages both for therapy and relaxing.

I too have had massage for therapy and relaxation purposes from size 10-16 and never in my life has anyone ever commented negatively on my back fat.
One lady I used to see once said that it was easier to do her job when the client was bigger because they can use their own body weight as part of the manipulation process.
I’m always clean and make a special effort to shave my armpits but please do go and enjoy being pampered, once you’re lying down it will feel like heaven.
However, if you feel like you’re going to be self conscious throughout the whole thing, look at what else you can book, head massage, reflexology or something. It would be a shame if you’re worries spoilt something so lovely, be kind to yourself and think what would make it the nicest experience for you. I don’t think anyone would think you were gross (come on, talk kindly about your body it’s the only one you’ve got!) and so call ahead about the table for reassurance.
Whoever gave you the voucher must have thought you deserved a lovely treat!