Does anyone else just have non stop stuff to do after work..

[Countdownto2234]

I mean it's ridiculous. I've just sat down to have my dinner..
I got home at 5.15pm, succession of giving DD dinner, bath, book and bed for 7.15pm.. Did a workout till 8pm, that's the only time I can exercise. Followed by shower, wash hair, blow dry hair, put wash on, make dinner, eat dinner, tidy up kitchen, wash up, hang washing up.. I've still got to make packed lunches and get work clothes ready for tomorrow. I mean every day x 5 days a week.. I don't wfh much so that's probably it really.. But even the days I do wfh, I still have a crap load of stuff to do after work.. Anyone else like this?

I'm a single parent and I exercise in the mornings before DS gets up. Couldn't do it otherwise. WFH so get the washing done then.

I make sure I stop whatever needs doing at 8pm and I chill out x

Single parent here. Some nights I try to eat with DC (not my preferred eating time but it’s wonderful to come down from bedtime knowing I then don’t need to start making my tea). Also try to get two meals for the price of one - so if need to make lunch for next day, take leftovers or make two lots of salad etc

Could you put washing on overnight to hang up in the morning instead ? That would save a little time in the evening ?

Agree with making time for exercise though - if I miss mine it then throws me off kilter with sleep / healthy eating

There's two of us here to manage one child and it still feels insanely relentless. I workout in the morning on the days I wfh. I couldn't find the time when I commuted every day, despite being a bit of a gym bunny before I had my child. So I gave up on exercise until COVID gave us lockdowns and wfh orders. It feels so good to have restarted.

Our evening routine is home/stop wfh at 6:30 by which time our daughter would have had dinner
Bath/prep dinner/tidy toys/snacks/stories bed by 7:30-8
Eat dinner/hang washing/sort sports kit/check homework has been done/load dishwasher/answer a few work emails by around 9
Collapse in front of tv for an hour and then go to bed to get ready to do it all again.

It's bloody relentless.

I'm not entirely sure how I could do everything in the morning before getting my daughter up. I'd basically have to wake up at 4am 😂. Fitness is extremely important to me, I used to be very overweight due to emotional comfort eating and a succession of bad events in my life. I joined a gym several years ago and started exercising 5 times a week and lost a lot of weight. When I had DD I started working out at home during her naps at the weekend and whenever I could in the week.. Now it's in the evenings. I've mentally disciplined myself that it's just part of my daily routine now. As I said, I did try waking up at 5.15am to incorporate the workout then but by 7pm I was literally a mess and couldn't keep my eyes open. I guess I just need to put up with it.. Unless I stop exercising then I'm not sure where I can save myself an hour every day.

I also don't have the option to wfh currently because of the nature of my job role. It has to be based in the hospital. I was thinking I might start booking annual leave a day off every week or every two weeks for a month just to recuperate.. But it'll only last a month and I'll go back to my normal routine again so seems pointless.
Weekends are full on too.. I don't sit down for more than 5 minutes at the weekend.

Can you batch cook so you don't have to cook every evening?

Even if you don't want to eat at 5.30 you could definitely make your dinner at the same time as hers to eat later... Can you eat the same thing? If not just get something else in the oven or on the stove while you're doing hers? Stick to simple food that doesn't require much cooking or washing up. Could also make the packed lunches while you are in the kitchen waiting for pasta to cook etc? You could also put the wash on before her bath.
And could you stop washing your hair every day? Or at least blow drying it! This sounds like so much work.
How old is your daughter? I shower quickly in the morning while getting my son ready for pre school but I do have a very small flat and he has just turned four so I appreciate this wouldn't be possible for everyone. It is really hard doing everything on your own. Good luck

It is hard, but I think you can probably cut down/multi task some of it a bit better. Even if you don’t want to eat at 5pm, can you cook something for DD that you can just microwave for yourself later? While she is eating, can you wash up and/or do the packed lunches? And then do what’s left while she’s finishing her breakfast in the morning? While she’s in the bath, can you hang out the washing (if you hang it out in the bathroom)? Daily washing does sound a lot for two people too; could you afford to buy an extra set of hospital clothes and wash half as often? Does your hair really need blow drying every night? Etc

Daughter is 3. Im usually up by 5.45am to give myself 45 minutes to get my self showered, dressed etc for work.. Then make my bed and a quick tidy. She wakes up for 6.30am and I drop her off to childcare for 7.15pm. I'm at work by 7.30am. I don't wash my hair every evening. I only wash my hair twice a week but even on the non hair washing nights I'm still sitting down late and not getting much of an evening. Even though I get sweaty after my workout, I can get away with dry shampoo for a couple of days before the next hair wash.

Week day dinners are always an oven job, I put dinner on whilst I go and shower when I get out I just make some veg or a salad to go with it. I never make elaborate meals in the week.

So glad it’s not just me! This is a perfect description of my life. Two of us working full time, DC with their respective activities, volunteering, pets, trying to make sure we have halfway decent healthy food most nights of the week. It’s relentless and exhausting and working from home because of Covid basically saved me from a breakdown. Dreading the return to the office 😩

I don’t even have kids and yes, it just never ends!

I was out at work 8am-1pm and then 6-11.30pm today. I went home in between (and worked there 3-5pm) but also had to go to the local version of Superdrug for a few things, make lunch, load of laundry, washing up, clear a cupboard in my room… emails, accounts, book flights…

I find that no matter how organised I am, there is still always stuff to do. The earliest I do it the less chaotic it feels but the load doesn’t get any smaller anyhow.

Yes. It's non-stop. And tonight when I had a little window between the chores, I had to get back on my laptop and do more work emails, organise an 8th birthday party, do the weekly meal plan and online shop, buy dog food, pay music lesson invoices, book holiday for half term, respond to emails from family about Christmas (already!!)...

DH pulls his weight where he can but is on duty till midnight in term time, so he's even busier than I am.

I actually think having a partner would cause me more stress and work lol.

I wouldn’t know what to do with myself if DD went to bed that early…

Not a single parent and don’t exercise, blow-dry my hair or look nice for work, but it is a fucking treadmill – work/small child relentlessness/eat/tidy/want to collapse but force myself to study to retrain instead/brief portion of staring into the middle distance too tired to shove Netflix on/pass out then wake up to do it all again.

Got the national lottery on direct debit.

Yes, 2 DC (7 and 4) and a DH at home here. I work FT, mostly out of the house. Older DC does multiple after school activities so there's a bit of ferrying him around. Younger DC just does nursery because the thought of having to ferry her around to stuff as well is too stressful to contemplate.

We've usually finished bedtime stories by around 8.15pm, at which point we do last bits of tidying/dishes/packed lunches and admin, which easily takes until 9pm if not a lot longer some nights. This evening I have been watching a school curriculum video and organising for DD's birthday party. Throughout this time I have to respond to older DC who repeatedly calls me upstairs until lights off at 9pm.

I am not doing well at fitting in exercise at all. Used to do it around 7.30 when they were younger and went to bed earlier, but it's getting more and more difficult to get away now.

I'm literally dreading as they get older, bed time gets later :-(

Surely batch cooking would help massively here!

During the week I never cook dinner - I just pull out a portion of something from the freezer in the morning and Chuck it in microwave for dinner ! Takes a few minutes!

Making a massive batch of something doesn’t take really any longer than making a small amount 🤷‍♀️

Not very exciting having dinner in the week as it’s just more freezer stuff - but the time I get back is worth it!

And yeah - you need to just eat your dinner at 5 with the kids - have a snack later if you are hungry again!

You could look at it as “I’m doing so well: I get time every night to exercise, shower and cook myself a separate meal!”

I think you are bonkers not to eat with your DD tbh. You are making some rather time-consuming choices.

I can't eat at 5 primarily because I don't want a meal in my stomach before exercising. It'll make me feel sluggish.
I think batch cooking and freezer meals will probably help though. Week day dinners are never they exciting anyway.

I would definitely be sorting your dinner, packed lunches and putting the wash on before dd's bedtime. Then you've got a lot less to worry about after 7.15.

Also don't need to shower in the morning if you've showered before bed!

The only things that helped me when I was in this situation were: making a huge batch of vegetable soup on a Sunday and freezing it in portions to eat in the week (which also helped with weight loss) and booking a day of annual Leave every three weeks or so on which I just took the DD's to school then rested up whilst they were there. I still ended up becoming ill with exhaustion in the end but that was what helped me carry on for as long as I did.

Me too - also a single parent, 2 kids 9 and 6 and one with SEN. Eldest doesn’t get to bed until nearly 9 now ( he has SEN and struggling with anxiety so o have to be there at bed).

I also understand not wanting to eat so early - it always felt a bit depressing to me, like another sacrifice. I’ve given in now though and do eat with them ( partly as they eat later now).

I’m impressed you manage to exercise - I wish I could. It’s relentless and tbh a bit depressing. I also thought about trying to take a days leave regularly, but then I need the leave for school holidays.

Not sure what the answer is - think I am now just hoping it will one day get better when they are older?

I had 3 kids and it felt relentless for a good few years but I also had a partner then. You need to cut corners wherever possible! For example, as the weather gets colder can you do a one pot slow cooker meal: buy bags of prepared vegetables like butternut squash etc. Add in a tin of butter beans and Pasatta etc. Vary it. Set the slow cooker off as you leave the house and then you can serve up the same meal at different times. Try dry shampoo some days. Are weekends/ days off any better for you? Also try some life hacks from Mrs Hinch.