Shall I leave my husband

[Missmarple45]

We've been together 10 years and have a 2 year old, things were good, but since having our child I've seen him in a different light and I feel like I really dislike him now and can't snap out of it! I feel like he's lazy, sits and watches me do everything, treats me like a housekeeper, barely helps me, moans about everything, he says its me, and I've changed since having our dd (which i have) We argue constantly and sometimes in front of our dd which breaks my heart, he blames me for everything, says I'm always upset and moody and its all in my head, I've tried to tell me how unhappy I am and we need to resolve things, but he says I'm the one causing the issues and I should just get on with it, or he just gets angry and shouts and tells me to leave! We can never sort anything out by talking, so I feel I need to shut up and put up with being miserable or leave, which I don't want for my child! I dont know what to do but im so sad for my child.....

That's four times too many, OP.
Of course he thinks it's all your fault. You won't carry on doing everything you've always done AND do everything for your DD on top. And you have the nerve to complain about him! And you aren't 'servicing' him adequately! He's totally wrong BTW, obviously, but this is the way his teeny tiny brain works.
It is not good for your DD to grow up in this environment. I've seen many posts on here from adult survivors of this, and they have long lasting problems.
Do you really think this lazy arse will want to have his DD 50% and do everything for her in that time if he can't even look after himself? Not likely.
The threatening to throw things at you / hit you is chilling to read.
He will get violent.
Save yourself, OP, please.
You need to get out, now.

Why are you asking the obvious?

Of course you should leave and you know that too.

You need to be seen to be safeguarding and putting your dcs safety first unless you comfortable with the idea of social services getting involved and potentially taking them away.

Theres just been an ama thread posted about a woman who's children were taken from her best she undermined what her "husband" put her through. I strongly suggest you read that.

To be honest people are giving you suggestions and you've got an answer... or rather an excuse for everything..
It sounds like you want to be the victim, and as long as you're prepared to be treated and accept the way he is.. nothing will change...
so put your big girl pants on and do something about it.!!

@Bluemum73

To be honest people are giving you suggestions and you've got an answer... or rather an excuse for everything.. It sounds like you want to be the victim, and as long as you're prepared to be treated and accept the way he is.. nothing will change... so put your big girl pants on and do something about it.!!

Perhaps give the op a chance to come to terms with what other posters are saying?

It's not as easy and you seem to think.

Sounds like you need to start telling people, keeping issues like these private sometimes is the worst option as exposing a man like that might actually help you, he may feel shame if others like his family were to know about his lack of help towards his own child. I’d definitely speak to him family and try and seek some mediation/support. Would counselling help? Can the marriage be salvaged?