Just turned 4 year old doesn't write or draw

[Ellis989]

Hi all
My DS was 4 last week so has another year before starting school.

He's my youngest and only boy. My older 2 have all loved scribbling with crayons, painting, drawing etc and I think were independently drawing vaguely recognisable people/ animals by this age. One was an August born and went to school the week after her 4th birthday able to just about form her letters and write her name (I did put a lot of effort into teaching her that though as I was worried about her starting school!)

DS just isnt interested. He likes painting but just mixes the colours on the page, often until the paper rips. If I sit with him to draw he keeps trying to hand me the pencil/ pen and do it for him. He says he can't. He has once or twice drawn a circle head with arms and legs after I've prompted each step.

He's a bright boy, has great speech and language and has been able to recognise all his number and letters for about six months now.

Should I be concerned and does anyone have any tips on how to help him in a 'fun' way?

This will sound mad but has he established handedness? My dd2 was the same: wouldn't put pen to paper and in her 2 yo check told the health visitor to draw for her! At 4, she still wasn't mark making to any significant degree. Turned out she was finding it impossible because she's left handed: she hadn't figured it out and was using her right hand. Once we'd noticed this we encouraged use of her left hand, as did nursery, and suffice to say at nearly 11 her writing is good. She doesn't like drawing/art but not everyone does regardless of their starting points.

Don't worry.

It's known that boys are generally later than girls with drawing and writing. There was lots of research and initiatives into it years ago and I attended a few early years courses on it.

Things recommended were games that involved the opportunity to write. For example set up a train and get him to make you a ticket. Don't worry what and how he writes just make it fun and take away the pressure of it being a 'thing'.

They also suggested things like making den spaces on the floor with pens and paper inside so they could lay down and mark make.

Focus just on mark making. Fill some trays with beans/ custard and sand etc and use finger or paintbrush to write letters in.

Sometimes the pressure of getting it right can stop them trying.

How is he at sitting still? The bottom muscles are the last to develop and until they are then actually they don't develop the fine motor skills required for writing.

Focus on the gross motor skills. Put paper on the garden wall or get chalks and paints and paint at that angle on a fence or wall of the house. Use spray bottles to spray paint or water at walls and make marks that way. Or medicine syringes are always fun!

My young boys use to love having builders trays filled with water and glitter in, don the puddle suits and spray glitter everywhere 🤷‍♀️🤣

The Five Minute Mum books / website have good ideas for different short games focusing on skills for that age. I've found some of them really useful for a reluctant writer. I found enthusiasm for drawing etc only really developed when they started school with mine.

My DS is 6 and loves to draw and color and paint etc. writing, less so. But he only really got interested from about age 4. Before that he’d just scribble a bit and then run off to play something physical.

My DD will be 4 next month and she will sit for ages and do art and write her name and pretend to write lists etc (she can’t really write, but she tries). I just assumed it was a personality thing as she’s much calmer in general, as well as girls being generally more advanced in that area at a younger age

This was my son, he’s nearly 8 now. 3 older sisters who were very much into fraying, writing, cutting and he wasn’t interested at all. Fine with Lego, buttons etc. He had an assessment going into school and neither he nor I had any idea which hand he used for scissors and his reluctance for writing was obvious. We had OTs suggested a few times but I didn’t pursue it because he was fine with other fine motor skills and it was clear the main issue was lack of interest.

Two years later he swapped hands completely and became left handed for everything, much to his teachers’ surprise .

He is now doing pull out extension maths and literacy, coordinated and sporty and has beautifully legible hand writing.

Some boys just take longer.

Dunno what “fraying” is, sorry, double screening