What do you get from MNing?

[Heruka]

Inspired by another thread where people were talking about frittering away time on their phone instead of quality me time.

I often wonder what is it I get from MN? Is it companionship? Entertainment? Raised blood pressure?!

I mean I know that there are good things, I’ve had good advice, been in awe of amazing women and amazing feminism. But it’s my go to for a kind of mindless time passing that I don’t fully understand…help me out?

Conversation where I always get to pick the topic and skip anything I don’t find interesting

Different perspectives on life. I hardly comment but read a lot.

Company in the evenings when DH is at work and the DDS are in bed.
Advice and support.
Christmas bargains and planning.

@minipie

Conversation where I always get to pick the topic and skip anything I don’t find interesting

This. Plus I learn and feel I can share things with, fairly often, like minded people. And I gain insight into the culture (UK) my husband comes from and where one of our children now live and work, as does his wife. Two of our grandchildren were born in England.

Comedy. Soap opera. Popcorn reading. Christmas stocking ideas.

Oh and also, insights into lives that are completely different (in RL the people I know are pretty homogeneous)

I get everything I need to know about fences/borders.

It makes me laugh.
It's educational.
The feminist board shames me into being more of a feminist
Holiday ideas
Christmas stuff
Advice on parenting
Competitions/draws
Gives me opportunity to contribute to threads I have knowledge or expertise
Sometimes shocks me
Gives me conversation ideas to have with DH (he always knows when I've been on MN)
Chat alongside watching tv (eg current vigil thread)

Some of these making me smile. And all quite positive! I guess my question is about the ‘frittering away’ feeling - is it just me? If I’ve spent an hour or two pootling away on MN, sometimes it’s a real pleasure like folk are saying, but others it can feel like a total waste of time and I’m not quite sure why I’ve done it, instead of having a bath, reading, other things that feel more self-carey. Know what I mean?

So much! Different ideas, opinions and ways of living. I know so much more 'stuff' about many, many things. It's amazing for help with random things like my 'where to park in Edinburgh' thread the other day. New brands of clothing and cosmetics to try. Confidence to deal with situations that I've read about previously on here. Weather forecasts. Literally loads of stuff!

A fair amount of judgement

It makes me laugh and it helped me stand up for myself when I saw what others did in similar situations when I was struggling with my self confidence.

I’m not on any form of social media, so from MN I get a platform to read, to comment if I feel I have anything useful to add or advise, I enjoy reading what others have to say and generally it’s a nice place to lurk around and have a browse.

Another one saying companionship, don't really talk to anyone in real life so I like being able to post on online communities.

i've only recently come back to MN and as much of it is quite positive, enlightening and funny, I am also dismayed by how many women out there are in really bad and controlling relationships.

I unquestionably spend too much time on Mumsnet, but it's not all frittered.

As well as delighting in ridiculous things on AIBU, I get:

• conversation
• recommendations (Christmas presents, holidays, TV etc)
• genuinely good advice (e.g. I had no idea about healthy boundaries until I joined Mumsnet)
• Feminism that, as a pp said, propels me into being a better feminist myself.

And loads of other fun stuff. Today I have looked at loads of great cat pictures on the Litter Tray, and am eagerly awaiting the arrival of the Poncetastic Christmas thread.

It gives me that smug sense of self satisfaction that you just can't find anywhere else

Contact with my old homeland. A lot of it comes as a culture shock frankly. It is so different here in remote coastal Ireland.

Also and very central, contact with folk.

NB my computer is old and wobbly so I may unhappily vanish, and not happy.

@RobertaFirmino

It gives me that smug sense of self satisfaction that you just can't find anywhere else

Hmm, do expand??!

@MarisPiper92

I unquestionably spend too much time on Mumsnet, but it's not all frittered.

As well as delighting in ridiculous things on AIBU, I get:

• conversation
• recommendations (Christmas presents, holidays, TV etc)
• genuinely good advice (e.g. I had no idea about healthy boundaries until I joined Mumsnet)
• Feminism that, as a pp said, propels me into being a better feminist myself.

And loads of other fun stuff. Today I have looked at loads of great cat pictures on the Litter Tray, and am eagerly awaiting the arrival of the Poncetastic Christmas thread.

And I’m interested in when you do feel it’s frittered - why?? Why do you not stop when it’s beneficial?

Like pp I am not on other social media so don’t fritter time there.

I am wondering in my case is there some weird dopamine hit thing going on - like rewards when people respond to my posts or something? Or maybe it is just more I’m looking for chat or connection, but with less expectation or obligation than from RL people.

I am sorry for those that say they don’t have much chat out with - fine if you want it that way, but sorry if you don’t.

MN made me see just how abusive my relationship was, simply from reading through others experiences and the responses given. That encouraged me to research more and educate myself about coercive control, eventually giving me the understanding and strength to finally leave. It's been a year now and I've never been happier!
On a lighter note, I really love the bargain threads and AIBU.

I do spend far too much time on MN - I could have written a novel or trained for a marathon in the time I spend here

MN helped me (under another name) when I was unhappy with exH. I was quite isolated then and I'm not sure I would have left him if I hadn't had people here encouraging me to think about what I wanted. Leaving him was undoubtedly the right thing to do, and we get on well now so I'm glad I did that.

I've lived abroad for 15 years and, have kept in contact with a few friends but I feel as though I'm losing touch with the UK and MN helps me with that. I don't get to speak English very much in RL and need to make an effort to read and listen to things in English. MN is good when I don't feel like reading anything too serious. That said I have learned loads here though, about lots of things.

Honest unbiased perspectives...no people-pleasing answers and conversations with people who are not part of your life.