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Original poster

State nursery, is this the norm?

30 replies

Singlevariety · 16/09/2021 09:18

Hello,

My DD just started a state nursery, 5 mornings a week. She's been going to a private nursery before, which she loved, but we decided on the school nursery as it's rated very highly and is attached to the school we want her to go to.

All good and exciting until she started on Tue. When I drop her off in the morning it's an absolute chaos in the nursery room. All parents are allowed to go in, no one is wearing any masks, hardly any room for little ones to move around and extremely noisy. My DD is very social and doesn't mind a bit of noise but this is extreme and is making her very very anxious. She never ever needed any settling, even when she was younger but she is very nervous now. At the previous nursery all children would be greeted at the gate, taken one by one by a teacher and led to a quiet area where everyone would wait for the other children to arrive. Then they would start their routine.

Is this normal in all state pre- schools? I feel very uneasy leaving her in the morning. Not sure how long this chaos lasts, I assume it gets quieter when all the parents leave.

OP posts:
Whinge · 16/09/2021 09:22

Parents / carers entering the room isn't normal in my experience. The children are greeted at the door and go inside on their own to hang up their coats / bags, then go off to play.

I would ask the teacher why parents are entering the room, as in my experience it makes the leaving / settling period much harder.

BingBongToTheMoon · 16/09/2021 09:23

Before COVID this was absolutely the norm.
It’s likely to be the same when she starts school too.

Bimblybomeyelash · 16/09/2021 09:27

I always helped my child hang up their
things and then left them as they walked in with a member of staff. I didn’t go into the main area. It always seemed pretty calm. Calmer than the private pre school my other child attended.

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Original poster
Singlevariety · 16/09/2021 09:28

@Whinge
I would ask the teacher why parents are entering the room, as in my experience it makes the leaving / settling period much harder.

I agree. I see children desperately crying in there, surely all this chaos doesn't help them settle.

OP posts:
Original poster
Singlevariety · 16/09/2021 09:31

@Bimblybomeyelash yes, this is let down really. I never imagined that parents would be allowed in the main area, there is hardly any room for everyone to move around. My DD is telling me to stay with her, this has never happened before.

OP posts:
girlmom21 · 16/09/2021 09:32

She never ever needed any settling, even when she was younger but she is very nervous now.

To be fair she's much more aware than she would've been when starting private nursery simply because of her age so it's not surprising that she's nervous in a new setting - that's to be expected.

LouNatics · 16/09/2021 09:39

You’ve reminded me of the thing I hated most about the infant stage.

Taking the child into the classroom, finding their peg, taking off and and hanging up their stuff, getting them to change into indoor shoes in the tiny cloakroom, taking them to a table so they could find a sticker and a pencil and write their name achingly slowly, struggle to peel off the sticker back and attach it to their fruit snack. Then find their drawer and put their fruit in it, follow them into the hall to put their lunchbox on the shelf, remember to swap the reading book, herd them back into the classroom to fight your way to the bloody mood caterpillar so they can velcro their picture onto the part of the caterpillar that matches their mood that day. Or write their name on the board to say they’ve arrived using one of maybe two dry wipe markers, or whatever else they’d decided on that week. Then get them to sit on the mat with their arms folded and finger on their lips ready to learn and attempt an exit.

All whilst dodging sixty other children and their parents plus all their smaller siblings from babes in arms to toddlers destroying the artwork the class created the day before.

Oh and I forgot about putting letters in the tray, reading records in their box and project work in yet another box.

I did six years of this shit every morning, you have my sympathies.

Original poster
Singlevariety · 16/09/2021 09:48

@girlmom21 I agree with you to a certain extent but she was 3 and 2 months when she started the previous nursery, almost 4 now. Not a huge difference, she's always been quite aware of her surroundings.

I just think this chaos is not good for anyone, they could organise the drop offs a bit better. When I was leaving, the lady who was supposed to guard the gates was having a little chat with someone, facing away from the gate and quite a distance from it. I thought a child could quite easily escape the nursery unnoticed.

I just hope this is perhaps the start, once the children are more settled it gets better?!

OP posts:
Original poster
Singlevariety · 16/09/2021 09:49

@LouNatics oh no! Confused

OP posts:
TakeYourFinalPosition · 16/09/2021 09:50

This was always the norm when I did nursery work, private & state. We’d never have had enough people to send one out to collect children… to be honest I thought that was a very American thing!

It’s chaotic but it calms when the parents have gone, and it reflects school to a certain extent.

NuffSaidSam · 16/09/2021 09:55

It will vary school to school. Not the case at all state schools, particularly post-covid. Lots of schools are still keeping parents in the playground.

Hopefully it's just because it's the first week and it will settle down after that because it does sound like a terrible way to manage drop offs.

What is pick-up like?

LittleGh0st · 16/09/2021 09:55

My daughter attended school nursery from age 2. The pre-nursery year (age 2-3) was just 8 children and the staff would take them from the door.

Nursery year (3-4) was 30 children. We would take them in, sign them in and hang their coats up, then the children would go off to play. But it was never chaotic or noisy.

This is a smallish London state primary.

likearoomwithoutaroof · 16/09/2021 09:56

This used to be the norm here, when my eldest was at preschool all parents would go into the tiny cloakroom, hand up bags, help change shoes, get lunches to put in the cupboard etc and take their child into the main area. It was chaos and my daughter HATED it. Always unsettled her and in the end it was so bad I made an arrangement to take her 15 minutes later because it would unsettle her for the whole morning (she has SEN, it turns out).

Now, because of covid, when taking my younger child all parents line up at the gate and the staff come and collect them and walk them in one by one. They line up together at a covered area and then go into the cloakroom in twos for staff to change their shoes and take their bags before being sent into the main area. It's brilliant! They've told me they're not going back to the old way even when covid is a distant memory. The children are way more settled and it's less chaotic (plus more covid secure for now, anyway).

MrsMariaReynolds · 16/09/2021 10:00

It's been a looooong time since my DS was in school nursery, but yes, this all sounds very familiar. Surprised it's still a thing in Covid times, however.

Original poster
Singlevariety · 16/09/2021 10:01

@NuffSaidSam pick-ups are much better. Children are sitting down inside and parents are queuing up at the door one by one. And DD seems happy too.

Yes, I do hope things will calm down in the morning once all children are settled.

OP posts:
Original poster
Singlevariety · 16/09/2021 10:03

@MrsMariaReynolds yes, that really surprises me too. We haven't beaten Covid yet, so I'm not sure why they think we should go fully back to pre-Covid times. Hmm

OP posts:
Peanutsandchilli · 16/09/2021 10:03

Yeah I'd say it was fairly normal before covid. Parents would go in to help them take their coats off, find their name, do the 'question of the day' and then settle their child into an activity. It was always a bit chaotic but it seemed to work well. Pick up was a lot more sedate. Since covid it's been children have to be left at the gate and go in by themselves, one teacher greeting them at the gate and a couple in the cloakroom to help with coats etc. It's something you'll get use to.

Peteycat · 16/09/2021 10:04

Why do you want people wearing masks? It's surely not healthy constantly having peoples faces covered with little ones. They need to see the staff and parents facial expressions.

Original poster
Singlevariety · 16/09/2021 10:06

Now, because of covid, when taking my younger child all parents line up at the gate and the staff come and collect them and walk them in one by one. They line up together at a covered area and then go into the cloakroom in twos for staff to change their shoes and take their bags before being sent into the main area. It's brilliant! They've told me they're not going back to the old way even when covid is a distant memory. The children are way more settled and it's less chaotic (plus more covid secure for now, anyway).

That's brilliant! This is what I was hoping for, but it does seem to vary from school to school.

OP posts:
Peteycat · 16/09/2021 10:07

"
@MrsMariaReynolds yes, that really surprises me too. We haven't beaten Covid yet, so I'm not sure why they think we should go fully back to pre-Covid times. hmm"

Don't send her in then. I'm not being horrible here, but I'm not sure what you expect? Schools are operating normally, so why do you think nursery is any different?

Thecomfortador · 16/09/2021 10:09

My ds has just started school nursery, the parents don't go in, the children go in welcomed by the teacher on the door and you can hear someone inside saying "do you remember where to put your coat" etc. Sounds overwhelming, although pre- Covid the private nursery we used parents would walk into the room to drop off and collect.

LouNatics school sounds nightmarish - how did anyone get to work if they had to do all that?! Back in the 80s parents left us at the gate and we ran around the playground until the bell went haha.

idontlikealdi · 16/09/2021 10:10

All nursery / pre school I've ever been involved with private or state have been drop and pick up at the door. Ditto primary school.

Original poster
Singlevariety · 16/09/2021 10:10

@Peteycat DD is my only child. I don't have any experience with schools. I had some expectations and obviously it was a bit of a shock to me. Hence I'm asking here whether this is normal or not. It seems it depends on the school. To stop taking her is a bit extreme, don't you think?

OP posts:
Peteycat · 16/09/2021 10:39

"10Singlevariety

@Peteycat DD is my only child. I don't have any experience with schools. I had some expectations and obviously it was a bit of a shock to me. Hence I'm asking here whether this is normal or not. It seems it depends on the school. To stop taking her is a bit extreme, don't you think?"

Ok. Fair enough. I know it's hard when they start nursery /school etc. I just don't agree with masks in childcare settings. Basically, the schools in England are not imposing masks in or outside at all. No bubbles, and assemblies etc are going ahead. I don't have experience of nurseries right now but I imagine they are the same. I hope your daughter enjoys her time there.

Blueroses99 · 16/09/2021 12:37

I don’t think it’s a private vs state thing.

Last September, DD started at a nursery attached to a school. Due to Covid measures each year group had a different start time and entrance gate. Nursery would queue up single file, about 30 children with one adult each. I never set foot inside the school until a parent teacher session in July.

This year DD has started Reception at a different school. All the primary children (Reception, Y1, Y2) all pile in through the same gate at the same start time, approx 250 children. It’s chaos! I wish some of the Covid measures of queuing separately had stuck! Nursery does have a separate gate and I don’t think that parents go inside but I don’t know.

However when when DD was in a private nursery, we would walk through and put things on the peg and take them into the nursery room. Perhaps we didn’t have the chaos that you describe because all the parents didn’t drop at exactly the same time eg the nursery would be open from 7.30 but you could drop anytime after that. During Covid, we could only drop at the gate.

Check with the nursery whether they are intending parents to come in and settle beyond the initial few weeks. I expect it will get calmer as parents and children get used to routine.