I really hated school and feel upset about DS starting

[KittenWithoutPortfolio]

I was always very unhappy at school, right from the start of Primary to the end of sixth-form. My DS has just started reception this week and it has suddenly brought up a lot of negative feelings for me. Thinking about him there right now makes my chest feel tight and like I want to burst into tears. I feel really guilty that I'm making him do this really horrible thing. Not that anything so far has been horrible from his POV, his teachers seem nice and he seemed to have enjoyed his first few days, it's very much my problem.

Has anyone else had a similar experience or have any advice? I want him to have a positive experience of school as possible and not pick up my negativity about it.

You're just going to have to let him get on with it and trust that you're experience won't be his experience because he's not you.

I think this is really normal, I think having a child brings up a lot of stuff generally from a parent's own childhood that they have buried. My child isn't school age yet but I am already overly preoccupied with whether they will be bullied because I was myself. I am really careful to not let it impact on my parenting or show my worries to DD though because it risks making her anxious and becoming a self fulfilling prophecy. I also take care to remember she's not me, in fact she is nothing like me, she's outgoing and makes friends easily where I was extremely shy and sheltered. Just as you wouldn't expect to have exactly the same experiences as your mother because you are not her.

Also a bit random but have you read The Shipping News? It's not the main theme of the book but it covers this exact scenario and I often find myself thinking about it!